Chit Chat

Just venting and whining

CMGragainCMGragain
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edited September 4 in Chit Chat
Damn, this new chemo has me so dizzy that I can't even walk through the grocery store without fear of fainting and making a scene.  So now I take the little motorized scooters, and I feel ridiculous.  Did you know that it is impossible to open the refrigerator cases while seated in one of those little scooters?  Now I know how people in wheel chairs feel!  I am used to being more independent.

Good thing:  this chemo is so nasty that they give me steroids before each treatment to help my body tolerate it.  The steroids have fixed my bad knee about 90%!!!!!!    Yay!  Thank you, God!  I can walk.  Now if I can only stop being so dizzy.

Bad news:  complication to my abdominal surgery.  Not serious.  There is a pouch of fluid collection just below my rib cage.  It is just beneath the skin and it is harmless.  It is about the size of a fist.  I am told that it will be naturally absorbed by my body -in a few months.  Meanwhile, I feel like I am John Hurt in "Alien" and I have this thing protruding from my stomach.  This sucks.

Good news:  We are flying my daughter and her family to visit us in October.  I get to see my Grandbabies!  My son says he wants to come at a different time, but I will believe that when he appears at the airport.  Maybe this time he will come.  I think he is in denial.

Thanks for listening to me whine.  I am really frustrated.




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Re: Just venting and whining

  • I love that you post with a sense of humor.  

    I have followed your updates and hope that the freezer section makes door opening easier.  

    Many hugs.   Fuck cancer.
    charlotte989875CMGragainILoveBeachMusic
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216
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    Sending you lots of hugs and positive vibes! Yay for reduced knee pain and seeing the grandbabies!
    CMGragain
  • CMGragainCMGragain
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    edited September 4
    One of the doctors had a "Come to Jesus" talk with DH.  She told him that our marriage has permanently changed, and that he cannot continue to expect the same things of me that he is used to having.

    No more waking me up at 5:00 PM after chemo and asking "What's for dinner?  When do we eat?"
    No more "Your cat threw up.  Clean it up!"  (Actually, it is HIS cat.)
    No more "I'm out of underwear.  When are you going to do the laundry?"
    No more "The dishes in the dishwasher are clean.. Put them away."
    He has been told to hire someone to do the hard cleaning (bathrooms and kitchen).  We can afford it, but he is worried about his piles of papers and "stuff" that litter the house.
    He has also been informed that merely pushing the vacuum cleaner around the house is not enough help for me.  He has to do more.

    I want to KISS that doctor!!!
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    OurWildKingdomredwoodoriginal
  • Wow. I hope your DH comes to his senses. I honestly can't believe he was expecting this stuff and that it took a doctor to be clear. 

    Two stops forward; one step back. Keep stepping.
    charlotte989875CMGragain
  • Sounds like you have a great doctor there who's going to advocate for you not just for medical care, but at home too. All the good vibes. 
    CMGragainOurWildKingdom
  • A big hug for you, @CMGragain. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all this, but I really admire your sense of humor and your ability to see the positive. I'm sure seeing your adorable grandkids will be wonderful! 
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    CMGragain
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
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    edited September 4
    Yeah, the look on DH's face was priceless!  That lady doctor was nose to nose with him, and she pulled no punches.  It is the first time I have ever seen him intimidated by a doctor.  He usually wants to be in control. (She told me that her husband stays home with the kids and does the housekeeping, and she is the breadwinner!  Yay, women's lib!)

    The early '70s was a whole different world.  Expectations were very different from today.  I am so pleased when I see how involved my son-in-law is with raising the grandkids and helping with the housekeeping. 

    Thank you for listening, friends.
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    OurWildKingdomcharlotte989875
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
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    CMGragain said:
    Yeah, the look on DH's face was priceless!  That lady doctor was nose to nose with him, and she pulled no punches.  It is the first time I have ever seen him intimidated by a doctor.  He usually wants to be in control. (She told me that her husband stays home with the kids and does the housekeeping, and she is the breadwinner!  Yay, women's lib!)

    The early '70s was a whole different world.  Expectations were very different from today.  I am so pleased when I see how involved my son-in-law is with raising the grandkids and helping with the housekeeping. 

    Thank you for listening, friends.

    I hear you.  We are from the same mold, generationally speaking.  However, things can and should change.

    I am an ironing freak.  F.R.E.A.K.  I run an iron over my t-shirts.  I USED to iron DH's work shirts, khaki's, and anything else necessary.  However, he would pull a shirt out from the bottom of the drawer, and leave the others in a wrinkled wake.  That got old fast for me and smacked of a complete disrespect of my time and effort.  DH does his own ironing now, and has for years. 

    When I worked PT, i did almost everything.  As the kids got older, I did start to work full time.  However, that was with the stipulation that chores became a shared undertaking.  If I cook, he cleans up. (I am the type of cook that cleans as I go, so its hardly a disaster.)  He dusts and vacuums (it's pretty hard to screw that up and I'm not that picky) and I do the scrubbing. 

    My mom had an even more traditional household.  As time went by, even my VERY traditional European dad learned how to do his laundry and shop for groceries and actually enjoyed it. He was a schmoozer, and loved chatting it up with his "regular" people at the deli, bakery, and check out. 

    Let your wallet do the talking.  If DH is worried about his "stuff", then make that room off limits and he can clean it himself!  If he does not want to pitch in, he'll just have to make the wallet shout a little louder.  He'll survive the change, and may actually find one of these new chores cathartic or pleasant!

    OurWildKingdomCMGragaincharlotte989875
  • Ironing?  What is that? :p
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    MobKazILoveBeachMusic
  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl The Cold North
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    CMGragain said:
    Ironing?  What is that? :p
    My Mom used to pay me $0.10 an item to iron for her.  I loved it - I did it in front of the tv and made over $7 one day, which when you're 7/8, makes you rich.  

    I'm sorry you're losing some independence CMGr, though I love that you're also seeing the upside as well.  Make sure your DH does the windows too.  ;)
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    MobKazcharlotte989875OliveOilsMom
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
    5000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
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    edited September 5
    CMGragain said:
    Ironing?  What is that? :p
    My Mom used to pay me $0.10 an item to iron for her.  I loved it - I did it in front of the tv and made over $7 one day, which when you're 7/8, makes you rich.  

    I'm sorry you're losing some independence CMGr, though I love that you're also seeing the upside as well.  Make sure your DH does the windows too.  ;)
    Yes......windows..............


    charlotte989875banana468OliveOilsMom
  • Ha!  He does windows!  We are blessed with a house that has spectacular views of the Colorado National Monument.  He loves the view and cleans the windows regularly.
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    WinstonsGirlOurWildKingdom
  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing Alaska
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    I'm sorry to hear that, but glad your H will be doing more.

    My grandpa was the same way. He never cooked or cleaned or anything like that. When he was old and had dementia and was living with his daughter, his daughter had to tell him "[My husband] doesn't want you to do that," when he would get into stuff because he wouldn't listen to her as a woman! Just a different generation and stuck in his ways.  :|

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