Destination Weddings

Destination Disaster!! ADVICE PLEASE !!

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Re: Destination Disaster!! ADVICE PLEASE !!

  • WOW most of you are being ridiculous and catty. This woman came here for advice, not to be shat on. Orange cat-lady: do you seriously expect brides/grooms to pay for every single person who wants to attend a destination wedding? That is ludicrous. If people want to attend your DW - they will make it there and pay for their week-long vacation themselves. If they don't want to come or can't afford it, they don't have to and there are no expectations! That's part of the beauty of having a DW, and that includes cruises.

    While I personally would not have an at home reception/shower that hosts people who are not going to be attending the wedding - people showed up to yours, so they must not be that offended. If you're that butt-hurt about not being able to attend the wedding. Don't go to the shower. If you're not a total ass and still want to celebrate your friends/family, then go to the shower & have a good time. Simple as that.

    When we booked our destination wedding (which is coming up this December) we had family on my fiances side that were upset about the date and the fact that it is so much more expensive this time of year, and that they'd not be able to afford it. I just told them sorry this is when we want to do it. They're not coming, and I'm indifferent. If they really wanted to be there, they would make it work. You don't need that kind of negativity anyway, planning a wedding is stressful enough! This is YOUR day. You do what YOU want and have no regrets. 

    I hope you guys have an amazing trip & it turns out exactly the way you want it to. xo.
  • "Kitty! Please!" - Jane Bennet, Pride & Prejudice
    "Marriage is so disruptive to one's social circle." - Mr. Woodhouse
    missJeanLouiseTrixieJesscharlotte989875SP29
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited October 8
    Hmmmm!   This is Knottieeb04ff5c79554528 's first post, and she comes here just to criticize just this thread.  Sounds very suspicious, to me.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    MobKazshort+sassy
  • WOW most of you are being ridiculous and catty. This woman came here for advice, not to be shat on. Orange cat-lady: do you seriously expect brides/grooms to pay for every single person who wants to attend a destination wedding? That is ludicrous. If people want to attend your DW - they will make it there and pay for their week-long vacation themselves. If they don't want to come or can't afford it, they don't have to and there are no expectations! That's part of the beauty of having a DW, and that includes cruises.

    While I personally would not have an at home reception/shower that hosts people who are not going to be attending the wedding - people showed up to yours, so they must not be that offended. If you're that butt-hurt about not being able to attend the wedding. Don't go to the shower. If you're not a total ass and still want to celebrate your friends/family, then go to the shower & have a good time. Simple as that.

    When we booked our destination wedding (which is coming up this December) we had family on my fiances side that were upset about the date and the fact that it is so much more expensive this time of year, and that they'd not be able to afford it. I just told them sorry this is when we want to do it. They're not coming, and I'm indifferent. If they really wanted to be there, they would make it work. You don't need that kind of negativity anyway, planning a wedding is stressful enough! This is YOUR day. You do what YOU want and have no regrets. 

    I hope you guys have an amazing trip & it turns out exactly the way you want it to. xo.
    .....and your attitude ISN'T ridiculous and catty? I would say it's actually worse. What a nice way to start a relationship with your new family. I'm sure they're thrilled to have you.
    InLoveInQueens
  • Now I want to change my username to OrangeCatLady.  I hope knottie#'s fiance knows how little she thinks of his family.
    ahoyweddingSP29
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom South Jersey
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member
    So glad I stumbled into this thread.  Had to stifle my loud chuckle at work when Knottie# referred to CMG as OrangeCatLady!  Its almost as good as the time a different Knottie# tried to accuse CMG of using curse words against her by changing a quoted post!
    MobKazahoyweddingcharlotte989875
  • It's YOUR wedding do what you and your fiancé will want. You should look back at this as a happy time not a misery fest. We are DW and considered the cruise but have decided to elope. We thought about the cruise but we don't want to be forced to be around guests the entire stay when we want mostly alone time on our honeymoon. For us that wouldn't work. I can picture myself sitting w my mom complain about the heat right now in my head. And my sister fighting. And my brother twisted wasted lol
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs
    5000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member
    It's YOUR wedding do what you and your fiancé will want. You should look back at this as a happy time not a misery fest. We are DW and considered the cruise but have decided to elope. We thought about the cruise but we don't want to be forced to be around guests the entire stay when we want mostly alone time on our honeymoon. For us that wouldn't work. I can picture myself sitting w my mom complain about the heat right now in my head. And my sister fighting. And my brother twisted wasted lol
    Good news!  If you and your BF have decided to elope than you no longer have to "feel weird" about telling everyone you're getting married but your BF has not proposed yet.  If you have decided to elope then, by definition, you ARE supposed to keep that information to yourself.

    As to your "advice", however, the ONLY time it is appropriate to tell a couple to "do what they want" is when they choose to elope. 

    CMGragainSP29charlotte989875InLoveInQueens
  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    member
    edited October 10
    My niece eloped two weeks ago.  She was from a very wealthy family, and she could have had any wedding she wanted, but they decided that they didn't want the stress of a big wedding, so they went to the NYC Courthouse and were married there.  If she had the big wedding, she would have had to worry about all the guests, and with our family drama, she decided to elope.  Her choice.  She got to do it her way.  Otherwise, there would have been lots of pressure from both families.  I sent her a card of congratulations.

    @MobKatz is right!  Once you invite guests, the day is no longer all about you!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    SP29
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