I Need A "Snarky Parents" Board...

kaos16

Why is everyone so entitled?  It's actually pretty horrifying.  If you choose to have a child, choose to provide for it, it's not that difficult of a concept.

DH and I are financially secure.  As we stand presently, if we were to have a female child I could buy that child new clothes, shoes, stroller, etc.  That hasn't stopped me from thinking twice with almost everything I buy for my male child.  He has a gray and white themed room with pops of blue, easy enough to grab some pink accents if need be.  New sneaker time. . . . these lime green chucks would look adorable on a little girl too.   Need an umbrella stroller for traveling? Gray and red looks good.  There's no rule that everything needs to be "girl" or "boy" to have a happy, healthy child!

*Barbie*

MesmrEwe said:

missJeanLouise said:

I really don't understand why these parents can't just buy their own things for their child. If you are stressed about not having anything, then acquire them. Is my logic flawed?

Think about it this way - Couple has finite amount of time to go shopping for all things new baby to hit the seasonal sales (all big ticket items even for essentials) - MIL promises a shower "Great - I won't need to purchase as many things..." so set a reasonable date to not have to go shopping in a rush with time after to do an inventory... Then MIL starts flaking out on the planning and hormones kick in because she's past the half-way mark in the PG and "any time after 29 weeks!" (though not likely until closer to 38 weeks, but anyway)...   And who knows - with her first she could have had health issues that she was on bed rest and didn't get to do anything the final 12 weeks so planning for that.  

Still - LW needs to take a breath and go pick out a car seat, some newborn size outfits, couple packs of different brand diapers (I had one kid sensitive to one brand and the other sensitive to the other one - buying in advance would have been a BAD idea!), a new diaper bag, and GTF over the whole shower thing.  

I'd like to point out that LW is married, presumably to her baby daddy. I would hope he's an adult who is capable of buying some baby successories. Even if LW ended up on bed rest or in the hospital, her H should be capable of taking care of stuff. 

I ended up on hospital bed rest at 33 weeks, and DK took care of all of the nesting stuff. 

TrixieJess

MRDCle said:

Wait, so should I not have used a purple hand-me-down bumbo for my son? Is this why he won't potty-train?! I didn't realize there was gender specificity to something my kid is just going to drool/pee/pooh on. 

Lol, yes exactly. 

Most of my start-ups were hand-me-downs and we were so grateful. FTR, my son was a surprise, but I had several people who wanted to throw me a shower and my only stipulations were that it hadto be coed and no games.

flantastic

short+sassy said:

flantastic said:

I'm in a FB pregnancy group that's a spinoff of another. With DD, I was in an analogous group (for that time frame), and I had to leave the group eventually because people were not having my (gentle) suggestion of "No, you don't throw your own shower, people will take it not well even if you don't mean it to be about getting gifts for yourself." Instead, "You do you! You deserve it, mama!"

PREGNANCY IS NOT A MAGICAL GATEWAY TO DESERVING PARTIES AND FREE STUFF.

Alternately, there was the "go for it because every baby deserves to be celebrated" BS. 1) Baby neither knows nor cares; 2) That can be done without a shower, oddly enough.

Luckily for me, this go-round the people are much more reasonable. Even still, there was the one person with the "you do you and screw the haters" response, which of course got the love from the OP.

I don't get this either.  Babies ARE celebrated!!!  By pretty much everyone.  Shoot, bring a baby to a friend/family gathering and most people are clamoring to hold, snuggle, and make happy faces at the little one.  There are also lots of congratulations to the parents.

Ummm...that is the essence of celebrating.  Why is that word being confused with "gifts"?

And, like other PPs have mentioned, people will typically give new parents gifts anyway.  Whether there is a shower or not.  I gave a coworker a small gift for his new baby.  Someone I was friendly with, but didn't socialize with outside of work.  I certainly wasn't invited to their shower, that would have been weird.  But I can still give a gift that says, "I'm excited for and thinking of you, your wife, and the new baby."

That was my other argument to the get across that it's really okay if you don't have a baby shower, even with the first baby (DO NOT THROW YOUR OWN) - if people really want to give the new parents gifts, they'll find a way.

People at church were handing me things they found at the thrift store. It may not be exactly what you registered for, but people will "oh what you really need is this, not this" in their infinite baby wisdom anyway. If you really want something specific, buy it yourself - you may have to even if you have a shower.

lovesclimbing

mrsconn23 said:

missJeanLouise said:

I really don't understand why these parents can't just buy their own things for their child. If you are stressed about not having anything, then acquire them. Is my logic flawed?

Here's another thing, babies really don't  *need* that much stuff.  A place to sleep, a car seat, diapers, and clothes.  Oh and if you breastfeed exclusively, you don't even need to buy them food for several months. 

People think the wedding industry is bad, but the baby shit industry is WORSE.  My mom works in a baby store and she marvels at how we didn't die even though she didn't have all.the.stuff that is shoved on new parents as something that is necessary to having a baby.  I mean she'll sell the shit out of a Bugaboo stroller, but her stories about people's insanity over what they think they need are hilarious. 

Bolded, italicized AND underlined because it's so true! 

My daughter is three months old. I'm a first-time mom, so someone who is 'supposed to' be "OMG, get all the things!"

My H and I didn't find out the gender so guess what! We registered for and bought gender-neutral stuff! What a concept! And even if we had found out, we still would have gone for gender neutral because we plan to have more children.

About 10% of her clothes are new (all gifted). The rest were bought second hand or gifted handmedowns. 

She slept with us part of the time and on a small mattress on the floor the rest of the time (and now sleeps on it all the time). She doesn't need toys, and won't for another month or so. And I'm also not the kind of person who buys tons of toys. A few good ones and simple ones and lots of books. She doesn't need the latest light-up, moving part, singing, talking toy that's out. Her nails are clipped with our fingernail clippers. She was bathed in the sink the first few weeks and now in the tub in shallow water - no dedicated baby tub or sponge to lay her on needed. 

Would I like to have had more things? Definitely! I wish I had some seats or something to put her in in the living room and kitchen. I want a higher quality baby carrier But it's not necessary. We were broke. She is loved and cared for and has everything she needs. 

And to be clear, all of this, I'm willing to do myself. I buy lots of my clothes at consignment shops. H and I have slept on mattresses on the floor multiple times when we've been broke. 

TrixieJess

lovesclimbing said:

mrsconn23 said:

missJeanLouise said:

I really don't understand why these parents can't just buy their own things for their child. If you are stressed about not having anything, then acquire them. Is my logic flawed?

Here's another thing, babies really don't  *need* that much stuff.  A place to sleep, a car seat, diapers, and clothes.  Oh and if you breastfeed exclusively, you don't even need to buy them food for several months. 

People think the wedding industry is bad, but the baby shit industry is WORSE.  My mom works in a baby store and she marvels at how we didn't die even though she didn't have all.the.stuff that is shoved on new parents as something that is necessary to having a baby.  I mean she'll sell the shit out of a Bugaboo stroller, but her stories about people's insanity over what they think they need are hilarious. 

Bolded, italicized AND underlined because it's so true! 

My daughter is three months old. I'm a first-time mom, so someone who is 'supposed to' be "OMG, get all the things!"

My H and I didn't find out the gender so guess what! We registered for and bought gender-neutral stuff! What a concept! And even if we had found out, we still would have gone for gender neutral because we plan to have more children.

About 10% of her clothes are new (all gifted). The rest were bought second hand or gifted handmedowns. 

She slept with us part of the time and on a small mattress on the floor the rest of the time (and now sleeps on it all the time). She doesn't need toys, and won't for another month or so. And I'm also not the kind of person who buys tons of toys. A few good ones and simple ones and lots of books. She doesn't need the latest light-up, moving part, singing, talking toy that's out. Her nails are clipped with our fingernail clippers. She was bathed in the sink the first few weeks and now in the tub in shallow water - no dedicated baby tub or sponge to lay her on needed. 

Would I like to have had more things? Definitely! I wish I had some seats or something to put her in in the living room and kitchen. I want a higher quality baby carrier But it's not necessary. We were broke. She is loved and cared for and has everything she needs. 

And to be clear, all of this, I'm willing to do myself. I buy lots of my clothes at consignment shops. H and I have slept on mattresses on the floor multiple times when we've been broke. 

I spend less than $50 a year on clothes and shoes thanks to having a friend who has a son who is a couple of years older. As for toys, we buy one toy a year at Christmas, grandparents on the other hand show up with crap all the time as do Aunties. 

kvruns

The funny thing with the shower is, at least in my experience, most people bought things not on the registry. We got a few things similar to some things registered for but for the most part the stuff we really did want/need we didn't get anyway so a shower isn't a guarantee you'll get what you want anyway. 

southernbelle0915

#adultplanning

The actual worst reason for a second shower that is the "well I'm having a boy/girl (whatever is the opposite of #1) this time!" Awful on so many levels: wastefulness, entitlement, genderizing little humans, consumed by consumerism...just ugh.

IDGAF whether you had a boy, a girl, or an armadillo the first time around... if you chose to buy things that you could not imagine anyone but another little girl/boy/armadillo using and OH MY GOD now you're pregnant with something else....this does not = other people tricking out your baby or your nursery. You know what it equals? YOU making the adult choice that comes with adult planning and adult parenting: 1) the boy wears pink or 2) YOU go buy whatever you think only little boys should wear. 

MissKittyDanger

southernbelle0915 said:

#adultplanning

The actual worst reason for a second shower that is the "well I'm having a boy/girl (whatever is the opposite of #1) this time!" Awful on so many levels: wastefulness, entitlement, genderizing little humans, consumed by consumerism...just ugh.

IDGAF whether you had a boy, a girl, or an armadillo the first time around... if you chose to buy things that you could not imagine anyone but another little girl/boy/armadillo using and OH MY GOD now you're pregnant with something else....this does not = other people tricking out your baby or your nursery. You know what it equals? YOU making the adult choice that comes with adult planning and adult parenting: 1) the boy wears pink or 2) YOU go buy whatever you think only little boys should wear. 

*gigglesnort*

missfrodo

short+sassy said:

kwiksilver said:

 
She added that last bit after myself and another woman *politely* pointed out that she isn't really entitled to a shower and shouldn't be involved in planning beyond providing a guest list.

Haha, I couldn't bold the actual part in the person's letter.  But, in reference to "I don't care how rich you are" and "getting new baby things is always nice"...let me give an analogy.

Do you know what else is really expensive...no matter how rich you are?  Buying a house.  But people manage to do that just fine by themselves.  Because there isn't (usually) this expectation that other people need to buy all the NEW furniture and appliances or whatever else they need.

BUY YOUR OWN STUFF!!!  Yeah, sorrynotsorry.  That's life.  People make adult decisions...all by themselves...that they alone (or with their partner) are responsible for.  Nothing hard about this concept.

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

ei34

In H's family the parents-to-be host their own baby shower. It's still strange to me.  They also have a baby shower for each baby.  They were shocked that we didn't have a shower for our twins (older DD was 14 mos when they were born).

Although my biggest cringe IL-baby shower memory is that I was invited to my SIL's baby shower for her second son as "and Guest" when H and I had already been dating two years and we'd met several times 

lovesclimbing

kvruns said:

The funny thing with the shower is, at least in my experience, most people bought things not on the registry. We got a few things similar to some things registered for but for the most part the stuff we really did want/need we didn't get anyway so a shower isn't a guarantee you'll get what you want anyway. 

Agreed. I received the car seat, diaper sprayer (we cloth diaper), high chair seat, and one diaper cover off my registry. I didn't receive the other diaper covers, baby carrier, bouncy seat, changing table, nursing cover, etc. I received mostly clothes and blankets. All of which we needed, but we received more than we needed of. 

flantastic

lovesclimbing said:

kvruns said:

The funny thing with the shower is, at least in my experience, most people bought things not on the registry. We got a few things similar to some things registered for but for the most part the stuff we really did want/need we didn't get anyway so a shower isn't a guarantee you'll get what you want anyway. 

Agreed. I received the car seat, diaper sprayer (we cloth diaper), high chair seat, and one diaper cover off my registry. I didn't receive the other diaper covers, baby carrier, bouncy seat, changing table, nursing cover, etc. I received mostly clothes and blankets. All of which we needed, but we received more than we needed of. 

Oh my gosh so many blankets. When we moved I dropped like 6 off at Goodwill, and we knew we were pregnant with #2 at that point.

banana468

flantastic said:

lovesclimbing said:

kvruns said:

The funny thing with the shower is, at least in my experience, most people bought things not on the registry. We got a few things similar to some things registered for but for the most part the stuff we really did want/need we didn't get anyway so a shower isn't a guarantee you'll get what you want anyway. 

Agreed. I received the car seat, diaper sprayer (we cloth diaper), high chair seat, and one diaper cover off my registry. I didn't receive the other diaper covers, baby carrier, bouncy seat, changing table, nursing cover, etc. I received mostly clothes and blankets. All of which we needed, but we received more than we needed of. 

Oh my gosh so many blankets. When we moved I dropped like 6 off at Goodwill, and we knew we were pregnant with #2 at that point.

SOOOO many towels and blankets.   I have receiving blankets that were washed and folded 7 years ago and haven't been used since. 

ahoywedding

southernbelle0915 said:

#adultplanning

The actual worst reason for a second shower that is the "well I'm having a boy/girl (whatever is the opposite of #1) this time!" Awful on so many levels: wastefulness, entitlement, genderizing little humans, consumed by consumerism...just ugh.

IDGAF whether you had a boy, a girl, or an armadillo the first time around... if you chose to buy things that you could not imagine anyone but another little girl/boy/armadillo using and OH MY GOD now you're pregnant with something else....this does not = other people tricking out your baby or your nursery. You know what it equals? YOU making the adult choice that comes with adult planning and adult parenting: 1) the boy wears pink or 2) YOU go buy whatever you think only little boys should wear. 

 To be fair, armadillos might have different dietary needs than human babies and probably can't fit in the same clothes, so maybe a shower would be justified?   

MissKittyDanger

ahoywedding said:

southernbelle0915 said:

#adultplanning

The actual worst reason for a second shower that is the "well I'm having a boy/girl (whatever is the opposite of #1) this time!" Awful on so many levels: wastefulness, entitlement, genderizing little humans, consumed by consumerism...just ugh.

IDGAF whether you had a boy, a girl, or an armadillo the first time around... if you chose to buy things that you could not imagine anyone but another little girl/boy/armadillo using and OH MY GOD now you're pregnant with something else....this does not = other people tricking out your baby or your nursery. You know what it equals? YOU making the adult choice that comes with adult planning and adult parenting: 1) the boy wears pink or 2) YOU go buy whatever you think only little boys should wear. 

 To be fair, armadillos might have different dietary needs than human babies and probably can't fit in the same clothes, so maybe a shower would be justified?   

#babyarmadilloshowers

jh715

TrixieJess said:

I spend less than $50 a year on clothes and shoes thanks to having a friend who has a son who is a couple of years older. As for toys, we buy one toy a year at Christmas, grandparents on the other hand show up with crap all the time as do Aunties. 

I seem to have found myself in hand me down heaven with my DD.  A) I don't mind putting her in some "boy" clothes, cause they're adorable and we like space, monsters, plaid, sharks and camping.  My niece is 9 months older than my daughter, so for a while we had a good supply of hand me downs from her, and now that DD is a behemoth and catching up in size I'm getting offers from friends.

I still buy my daughter clothes, but I'm super lucky to be able to get cute stuff that I want for he rather than having to buy staples.

In terms of toys, we're the cheapest.  Birthdays and Christmas gifts are generally 2nd hand.  This year we bought skis and boots, so the cost was higher than normal, but we'll save on rentals when we take our daughter to the hill once a week.

short+sassy

missfrodo said:

short+sassy said:

Haha, I couldn't bold the actual part in the person's letter.  But, in reference to "I don't care how rich you are" and "getting new baby things is always nice"...let me give an analogy.

Do you know what else is really expensive...no matter how rich you are?  Buying a house.  But people manage to do that just fine by themselves.  Because there isn't (usually) this expectation that other people need to buy all the NEW furniture and appliances or whatever else they need.

BUY YOUR OWN STUFF!!!  Yeah, sorrynotsorry.  That's life.  People make adult decisions...all by themselves...that they alone (or with their partner) are responsible for.  Nothing hard about this concept.

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

A house shower is a brilliant idea, lol.  Just don't forget the inserts for the invites that list the exact paint color/finish you want and any other measurements/sizes needed for your guests to buy the perfect gifts.

Make sure to spread by word of mouth that, of course, the $10K Tempurpedic mattress with the adjustable base is too much for any one person to buy.  But if some guests pooled their money tooooggeetttherrr (wink, wink).

kwiksilver

Jesus Christ. I can't even

TrixieJess

kwiksilver said:

Jesus Christ. I can't even

How do you plan a child at 17? I was planning which bush party or kegger I'd be attending. AND I was on the pill "just in case".

short+sassy

kwiksilver said:

Jesus Christ. I can't even

OMG, you actually planned to get pregnant at 17 and still in high school?!?  So, neither one of you really thought it through (eye roll).

And, how old is this guy that he is already engaged?

Here's what's happening, LW, some of it is my assumptions:

• This older guy took advantage of your youth and inexperience.
• He's either been engaged or was at least dating his current FI the whole time he's been with you.
• And lied to you and her about it.
• Don't expect him to be in your child's life at all.  But DO expect him to pay child support.  F**k him and his "I'll throw you Pampers, once in awhile".
• Take him to court after the baby is born for an order of support and get his wages garnished, if need be.
• Don't have the slightest concern if his fiancée finds out or not.  Seriously.  That's his problem.  Why would you even care?  If anything, use that as leverage.
  

OliveOilsMom

What website are you on that they are asking such crazy cakes questions???  I feel bad for the 17 year old.  I hope it is MUD!

MissKittyDanger

missfrodo said:

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

We had a house warming and deliberately told people "no gifts" because it wasn't that kind of thing.
Only 'gift' we essentially got was that my aunt and uncle said they had a lot of doubles in tools, and since we now had a house we were open to going through their tool stock and get what we needed.

TrixieJess

@kwiksilver - are you on the American Babycenter? The women on the Canadian Babycenter used to talk about the entertainment value of the American one all the time. 

short+sassy

MissKittyDanger said:

missfrodo said:

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

We had a house warming and deliberately told people "no gifts" because it wasn't that kind of thing.
Only 'gift' we essentially got was that my aunt and uncle said they had a lot of doubles in tools, and since we now had a house we were open to going through their tool stock and get what we needed.

I read a fantastic article years ago that was basically all the expenses you have for your first home that no one tells you about.  It was written in a comedic, "tongue in cheek" style.  But was so true!

"I love that this house has so many windows!  So bright and airy!"  After closing, "Huh.  This house has a lot of windows.  Excuse me while I go spend my next paycheck on curtain rods and window treatments."

And TOOLS.  OMG.  All the tools.  @MissKittyDanger, your aunt and uncle are the best ever, lol.

On, I swear, our 100th visit to Home Depot the same month we bought my house, I said to my H, "I've always disliked going to hardware stores.  But I really hate it now."  He told me that, over time, I'd be surprised to find that I love it.

6 months later.  Browsing the aisles at HD for the 1,000th time.  I said, "You told me I was eventually going to love coming to HD.  I still hate it."  He said, "I know.  I lied.  I was trying to soften the blow."  LMAO.

MissKittyDanger

short+sassy said:

MissKittyDanger said:

missfrodo said:

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

We had a house warming and deliberately told people "no gifts" because it wasn't that kind of thing.
Only 'gift' we essentially got was that my aunt and uncle said they had a lot of doubles in tools, and since we now had a house we were open to going through their tool stock and get what we needed.

I read a fantastic article years ago that was basically all the expenses you have for your first home that no one tells you about.  It was written in a comedic, "tongue in cheek" style.  But was so true!

"I love that this house has so many windows!  So bright and airy!"  After closing, "Huh.  This house has a lot of windows.  Excuse me while I go spend my next paycheck on curtain rods and window treatments."

And TOOLS.  OMG.  All the tools.  @MissKittyDanger, your aunt and uncle are the best ever, lol.

On, I swear, our 100th visit to Home Depot the same month we bought my house, I said to my H, "I've always disliked going to hardware stores.  But I really hate it now."  He told me that, over time, I'd be surprised to find that I love it.

6 months later.  Browsing the aisles at HD for the 1,000th time.  I said, "You told me I was eventually going to love coming to HD.  I still hate it."  He said, "I know.  I lied.  I was trying to soften the blow."  LMAO.

I have never been to Home Depot so much in my friggen life. M's been building a work bench.
We walk in and it's typically a Saturday, so we know who's working. I'm pretty sure the cashier we seem to always get is wondering what we're doing

short+sassy

MissKittyDanger said:

short+sassy said:

I read a fantastic article years ago that was basically all the expenses you have for your first home that no one tells you about.  It was written in a comedic, "tongue in cheek" style.  But was so true!

"I love that this house has so many windows!  So bright and airy!"  After closing, "Huh.  This house has a lot of windows.  Excuse me while I go spend my next paycheck on curtain rods and window treatments."

And TOOLS.  OMG.  All the tools.  @MissKittyDanger, your aunt and uncle are the best ever, lol.

On, I swear, our 100th visit to Home Depot the same month we bought my house, I said to my H, "I've always disliked going to hardware stores.  But I really hate it now."  He told me that, over time, I'd be surprised to find that I love it.

6 months later.  Browsing the aisles at HD for the 1,000th time.  I said, "You told me I was eventually going to love coming to HD.  I still hate it."  He said, "I know.  I lied.  I was trying to soften the blow."  LMAO.

I have never been to Home Depot so much in my friggen life. M's been building a work bench.
We walk in and it's typically a Saturday, so we know who's working. I'm pretty sure the cashier we seem to always get is wondering what we're doing

I'm going to let you in on my secret strategy.  Though I think know he's on to me.  My H is an avid gardener.  So there is almost always something on the list in the garden center.  I volunteer to go get those items.  Maybe 5 minutes and done.  Then I camp out at one of the display patio sets and play on my phone until he is FINALLY done, lol.

I do have an admittedly weird obsession with refrigerators and will occasionally peruse that area.  Because I need a $3K black slate, ginormous fridge that you can write your grocery list on and look at it, at the store!!!!!  Because I always forget my list or go unexpectedly.  So I NEED it.  Until next month, when some even better feature catches my eye that I have to have, lol. 

MissKittyDanger

short+sassy said:

MissKittyDanger said:

short+sassy said:

I read a fantastic article years ago that was basically all the expenses you have for your first home that no one tells you about.  It was written in a comedic, "tongue in cheek" style.  But was so true!

"I love that this house has so many windows!  So bright and airy!"  After closing, "Huh.  This house has a lot of windows.  Excuse me while I go spend my next paycheck on curtain rods and window treatments."

And TOOLS.  OMG.  All the tools.  @MissKittyDanger, your aunt and uncle are the best ever, lol.

On, I swear, our 100th visit to Home Depot the same month we bought my house, I said to my H, "I've always disliked going to hardware stores.  But I really hate it now."  He told me that, over time, I'd be surprised to find that I love it.

6 months later.  Browsing the aisles at HD for the 1,000th time.  I said, "You told me I was eventually going to love coming to HD.  I still hate it."  He said, "I know.  I lied.  I was trying to soften the blow."  LMAO.

I have never been to Home Depot so much in my friggen life. M's been building a work bench.
We walk in and it's typically a Saturday, so we know who's working. I'm pretty sure the cashier we seem to always get is wondering what we're doing

I'm going to let you in on my secret strategy.  Though I think know he's on to me.  My H is an avid gardener.  So there is almost always something on the list in the garden center.  I volunteer to go get those items.  Maybe 5 minutes and done.  Then I camp out at one of the display patio sets and play on my phone until he is FINALLY done, lol.

I do have an admittedly weird obsession with refrigerators and will occasionally peruse that area.  Because I need a $3K black slate, ginormous fridge that you can write your grocery list on and look at it, at the store!!!!!  Because I always forget my list or go unexpectedly.  So I NEED it.  Until next month, when some even better feature catches my eye that I have to have, lol. 

We've been going to the lumber area typically .... but since we're there, I look at the patio stones. We're doing are yard next year so I neeeeed to price them

And paint. Always look at paint.

Fridge cheat - buy plank of wood. Paint with chalkboard paint. Attached to current fridge {or beside if you have space} Use that to write lists

levioosa

short+sassy said:

MissKittyDanger said:

missfrodo said:

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

We had a house warming and deliberately told people "no gifts" because it wasn't that kind of thing.
Only 'gift' we essentially got was that my aunt and uncle said they had a lot of doubles in tools, and since we now had a house we were open to going through their tool stock and get what we needed.

I read a fantastic article years ago that was basically all the expenses you have for your first home that no one tells you about.  It was written in a comedic, "tongue in cheek" style.  But was so true!

"I love that this house has so many windows!  So bright and airy!"  After closing, "Huh.  This house has a lot of windows.  Excuse me while I go spend my next paycheck on curtain rods and window treatments."

And TOOLS.  OMG.  All the tools.  @MissKittyDanger, your aunt and uncle are the best ever, lol.

On, I swear, our 100th visit to Home Depot the same month we bought my house, I said to my H, "I've always disliked going to hardware stores.  But I really hate it now."  He told me that, over time, I'd be surprised to find that I love it.

6 months later.  Browsing the aisles at HD for the 1,000th time.  I said, "You told me I was eventually going to love coming to HD.  I still hate it."  He said, "I know.  I lied.  I was trying to soften the blow."  LMAO.

I feel the bolded on a spiritual level. Our house is a fishbowl. It has windows on almost every fucking wall. Which, is lovely, but I spent like $2000 on window coverings/treatments when we bought the house. 

charlotte989875

levioosa said:

short+sassy said:

MissKittyDanger said:

missfrodo said:

Totally going to start a house registry for when I move, and throw myself a "house shower."  People can buy me little bottles of oil for the furnace, cans of paint to fix up the rooms, and 2x4 planks for when I put my foot through the deck.  Housewarmings? A housewarming is for schmucks that don't know how to mooch off their friends!  We need house showers!  (end sarcasm font.)  (also I would be ecstatic if I gave birth to an armadillo, other than the fear of leprosy.)

We had a house warming and deliberately told people "no gifts" because it wasn't that kind of thing.
Only 'gift' we essentially got was that my aunt and uncle said they had a lot of doubles in tools, and since we now had a house we were open to going through their tool stock and get what we needed.

I read a fantastic article years ago that was basically all the expenses you have for your first home that no one tells you about.  It was written in a comedic, "tongue in cheek" style.  But was so true!

"I love that this house has so many windows!  So bright and airy!"  After closing, "Huh.  This house has a lot of windows.  Excuse me while I go spend my next paycheck on curtain rods and window treatments."

And TOOLS.  OMG.  All the tools.  @MissKittyDanger, your aunt and uncle are the best ever, lol.

On, I swear, our 100th visit to Home Depot the same month we bought my house, I said to my H, "I've always disliked going to hardware stores.  But I really hate it now."  He told me that, over time, I'd be surprised to find that I love it.

6 months later.  Browsing the aisles at HD for the 1,000th time.  I said, "You told me I was eventually going to love coming to HD.  I still hate it."  He said, "I know.  I lied.  I was trying to soften the blow."  LMAO.

I feel the bolded on a spiritual level. Our house is a fishbowl. It has windows on almost every fucking wall. Which, is lovely, but I spent like $2000 on window coverings/treatments when we bought the house. 

We got to the point with windows that we said eff it there's no one living in the house on one side where our dining room and guest room on the second floor faced that we just didn't put up curtains there. Too much work and no one was looking in anyway.