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Celebration of Love

My husband and I got eloped and never did a wedding. We understand that it would not make sense to have one, now that we are married. However, we would still like to have a sort of celebration for our marriage. (We had to go without the wedding due to certain situations that will be left unsaid.) Neither of our families were there with us, we had two people for our witnesses and that is it. We want to do something small so we can not only celebrate us getting married, but also have our families together as they would be in an actual wedding.
    We thought of doing a pot luck type of thing. The attire would be Sunday best, so there isn't a huge wedding gown, or the maids or grooms men.
We will have music and a couples dance with some karaoke. A "Battle of the sex's" sort of game "Family Bingo." We are thinking of doing a toast with speeches but haven't made our mind up on that yet.

Is there anything else we should do? I want it to last a good amount of time. How should we word the invitations? Any ideas? Thoughts? Please help us!! (NO NEGATIVITY PLEASE. I see a lot of people bashing others for getting eloped and not having a wedding till later on. REMEMBER THIS IS NOT A WEDDING!) 

Also, not many people knew of us getting married some of them are a little hurt that we didn't tell them about it until after wards.

Re: Celebration of Love

  • CMGragainCMGragain
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited September 23
    You already posted this on another board.  Please change your title to include XP so we know we have already read your question.
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut
    Moderator Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited September 23
    I have never seen anyone get bashed for eloping. It's perfectly fine way to get married. People get bashed for hiding the fact that their married and deceiving their guests with a fake wedding ceremony. But that's not what you have in mind, right?

    You can have a party to celebrate your marriage. If you are hosting it, you must provide the refreshments. They can be simple and appropriate for the time of day. Finger foods, coffee, tea punch in the mid afternoon or dessert party after 8 p.m. An ice cream social would be fun. If you have your party at meal time, you must provide the meal - pizza, beer, wine or whatever your budget allows. No pot luck.

    Karaoke and dancing sound like fun. I think you may be planning too many activities. If you plan to have a dj and dancing, the games are probably going to detract from that. You should let your guests have time to socialize.

    Some of the community members are strict about there being no wedding elements at celebrations of marriage. But I don't see anything wrong with having a fancy tiered cake that you cut and serve each other and your guests or toasting each other with champagne or wine. Your outfits should be consistent with the formality of your venue and your hosting. 

    How long ago were you married? I would consider having this event on your anniversary and calling it an anniversary party. 

  • levioosalevioosa Southern California
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Go ahead and have the party, but you need to host it. No potluck. 

  • A wedding is a marriage ceremony- which you had, you just eloped- which is totally cool! People get "negativity" not about eloping or having a celebration of marriage party, but because they are trying to lie to their guests and have a wedding re-enactment later (but their gets think they are getting married). Two totally different scenarios.

    People may be upset that you eloped, but you didn't do anything wrong by doing that.

    A celebration of marriage or anniversary party is awesome! But you do need to host it. You could host it at a venue (a Veteran's Hall, Knights of Columbus or cultural hall would be cheapest) and bring in the karaoke set up, or try to find a karaoke bar to rent out for the evening. You can get a catered meal, go to a restaurant and cover the cost of a pre-selected menu (i.e. you pick 2-5 entree items you would be comfortable covering the cost of, + drinks), or bring in pizza, or as said, have the party at a non-meal time and provide snack/apps/desserts and drinks.

    You can't ask your guests to dress in Sunday best, but the formality of your invitation and venue will let your guests know how formal to dress.

    I agree that having a DJ + karaoke + games is a bit much. You really don't have to entertain your guests (beyond providing appropriate food and drink with a place to sit), so don't worry about having to fill the time- guests will socialize.

    Enjoy your party!
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