Talk to neither

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,
I broke up with my boyfriend of a few years about three months ago. We’ve kept things cordial, and I’ve made it very clear that we are only going to be friends. Recently his mother contacted me and told me that I needed to stop speaking with her son because I was “stringing him along.” She also said that my mother should block him on her social media pages because he “obsesses” over glimpses into my life. I told her I didn’t want to discuss him with her and ended the conversation. She persisted in telling me that she felt I was dismissive of her. I think I should let him know about her meddling, as it has caused problems for him in the past (she was sneaking around buying him alcohol when he was supposed to be cleaning up his act). But I also don’t want to cause any drama. Should I spill the beans? Keep it to myself? Stop talking to him altogether?
—Trying to Keep an Even Keel

GBCK

Fwd the screen shots, ask mom to block him, and block everybody.  

STARMOON44

Become a hermit speak to no one. 

missJeanLouise

Stop talking to him altogether. Delete, if not block, each other on social media. (This is my advice for every recently parted couples and the exact advice I gave my friend earlier tonight) 

MissKittyDanger

An ex and I tried to be friends after a break up - even meeting for coffee a few times - and a few friends did what this mother did and I actually turned around and explained I was trying to be friends. If he was still having problems HE needed to speak up and I would gladly back off.

He never did. We ended up drifting apart because I felt he was acting as if we were back together, so I backed off for him.

CharmedPam

Now she knows it's not as cordial as she thinks it is (he's glimpsing into her life), I agree. Unless his mom is a liar?

Who has parents that are that meddlesome? 

short+sassy

That would greatly irritate me.  Like, "Lady, I'm barely in your son's life anymore (just a friend) and definitely not in yours.  Especially don't tell me, to tell my mom, how to run her FB account, FFS."  I don't control another adult's social media.  And you should take the same hint!

The only take away I would have from that convo is to maybe keep eye on if the ex seems to be still attached and not moving on.

southernbelle0915

LW tried to be nice. No more time for that. "Please don't contact me again." End conversation. Block social media accounts/contact. Block phone number. 

flantastic

short+sassy said:

That would greatly irritate me.  Like, "Lady, I'm barely in your son's life anymore (just a friend) and definitely not in yours.  Especially don't tell me, to tell my mom, how to run her FB account, FFS."  I don't control another adult's social media.  And you should take the same hint!

The only take away I would have from that convo is to maybe keep eye on if the ex seems to be still attached and not moving on.

While I agree with everyone else that it's probably best to stop talking to the ex as well based on some potentially accurate new info, I'd be hesitant to do anything this lady suggested simply because what I do and who I talk to and who my mom has on social media is zero percent her business, and I can be spiteful that way.

judywedding2019

You dont need to spend much time on this. Tell your ex the truth and block him and his mother. End of story. You have your own new life, never waste time and energy on the bullshit.

charlotte989875

Stop talking to him, if you don't want to be with him anymore, let it all go. But also your mother is an adult, so are you so do what you want with your social media.

His mother's concerns should be addressed to him, not you.

banana468

This has bad news written all over it.   Block her # and stop talking to both of them.   He's a mama's boy who is enabled by a mother who isn't letting her son grow up and the LW is too nice to just stop talking.   They're not together anymore and unless there are kids / pets involved, stop linking yourself to him in friendship.