Etiquette

Paying for Guest Parking

Happy New Year knotties!

FI and I are getting married this spring, so I’m starting to think about some of the more logistical details of the day including guest transportation/parking. Our ceremony will be held at our church about 20-25 minutes outside the city and the reception will be downtown where parking options include nearby garages ($5-10) or limited but free street parking. Unfortunately we had not budgeted for any sort of shuttle or valet service because this is something FI’s parents said they would cover. However, after seeing how expensive the rehearsal dinner they wanted to throw would be, they backed out of this. FI has already asked if they could make a couple cuts to the rehersal dinner to help with this as they had originally said, but they’re set in their plans for the dinner. 

So right now the options I’m looking at are: leaving it totally up to guests to find parking but making the options clear on the wedding website (free to us) OR bringing in a valet service for the night and “subsidizing” a few bucks per car so guests would be paying maybe $5 total (would cost us about $500 which is probably doable). 

What are everyone’s thoughts? I would absolutely love to be able to cover transportation or parking for our guests but it’s just not feasible monetarily. 

Thanks for your input!
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Re: Paying for Guest Parking

  • Yes, you should find a way to cover the parking for your guests, because guests shouldn't have to pay for anything at a wedding. Since there's a parking garage, I would first ask your reception venue if they validate parking. Our RD was at a restaurant that usually doesn't validate parking for regular customers but they do for events. We emailed this info to the guests attending the RD but if the parking affects everyone I would put it on your website and maybe also include an information card in the invites. You could also check with the parking company to see what options they have for you. 

    Are the guests staying closer to the church or reception venue? If you hired transportation, it might be more expensive to bring them from hotel to church to reception and back to hotel, and it would also suck for their cars to be at the church and then have to get back to their hotels. 

    Also, let this be a lesson to everyone to not count on money towards anything until it's actually in your hand. It's unfortunate your FILs put you all in this situation.
    short+sassy
  • As long as the venue doesn’t offer parking, I don’t think you need to pay for. I always assume that I’m on the hook for parking and the cost of gas for traveling to a wedding. 
    eileenrobMobKazSP29
  • I agree with the others.  If parking is available at the venue, it just isn't free, then I think you all are on the hook for that.  I even think a cheaper lot that is on the same block or so would also be fine.

    Although a different situation, there is a restaurant inside a hotel that I occasionally mystery shop.  No free parking anywhere and even meters are very hard to come by.  I'm reimbursed up to $15 for parking but the instructions, in bold letters, warn to not use the hotel valet parking because it is a flat day rate of $35.  The instructions suggest and give an address for a parking garage that is half a block away. 

    If parking isn't available at the venue, then it is okay for guests to be on their own for parking.

    Here's another thought.  What if you all scaled way back on the RD or cut it out all together.  If there is no rehearsal, and most people don't need one, then there doesn't need to be a dinner.  And your future IL's can pay for the venue parking.

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • banana468 said:
    Yes, you should find a way to cover the parking for your guests, because guests shouldn't have to pay for anything at a wedding. Since there's a parking garage, I would first ask your reception venue if they validate parking. Our RD was at a restaurant that usually doesn't validate parking for regular customers but they do for events. We emailed this info to the guests attending the RD but if the parking affects everyone I would put it on your website and maybe also include an information card in the invites. You could also check with the parking company to see what options they have for you. 

    Are the guests staying closer to the church or reception venue? If you hired transportation, it might be more expensive to bring them from hotel to church to reception and back to hotel, and it would also suck for their cars to be at the church and then have to get back to their hotels. 

    Also, let this be a lesson to everyone to not count on money towards anything until it's actually in your hand. It's unfortunate your FILs put you all in this situation.
    I agree with this IF the venue has their own parking lot / garage.   Many in cities don't.   They're near a garage but it's not maintained by them and ditto for lots.   In those cases I'm a bit softer on parking especially when there's probably public transportation as an option.

    That's different than having your venue in an area like a park that charges for parking and then your guests have to pay to get in.   It's a fine line IMO...
    Yeah, you're right about this. I guess it's been a while since I've been to a wedding at a place that didn't have their own parking. If a wedding is downtown in a bigger city, I would appreciate some tips on garages or lots that are available, but I guess I would plan on paying for my own parking. It would be super nice to find out parking was validated or covered though. It is kind of a fine line.
  • I don’t think you need to do this. Just  say nothing pay nothing and let them deal with it.
    eileenrobPrettyGirlLost
  • Thanks for the input, everyone. So, for a little more information, the closest garage is about 3 blocks away. Nothing that would bother me personally, but something that I know could be an inconvenience for some, especially those with kids or who are older. 

    I guess my thinking with hiring valet but still having guests pay a portion is that it gives them a second option at the same rate as the garage (when it would otherwise be double the cost), but which is more convenient. I guess I'm thinking that if I were a guest, I would just appreciate that the valet was an option, especially if it would end up costing the same as a garage a few blocks away. 

    Thoughts?
  • Can you talk to your venue to see what they recommend or ask around to other couples?   
  • Thanks for the input, everyone. So, for a little more information, the closest garage is about 3 blocks away. Nothing that would bother me personally, but something that I know could be an inconvenience for some, especially those with kids or who are older. 

    I guess my thinking with hiring valet but still having guests pay a portion is that it gives them a second option at the same rate as the garage (when it would otherwise be double the cost), but which is more convenient. I guess I'm thinking that if I were a guest, I would just appreciate that the valet was an option, especially if it would end up costing the same as a garage a few blocks away. 

    Thoughts?

    I think your intentions are good, but basically going halfway (hiring a valet but not fully paying parking) draws more attention to the issue than just accepting that parking is on the guests and providing info. Like, you don't want people to feel halfway taken care of, you know? It's on guests to get to your wedding however they chose to given no on-site parking, and then when they get there everything's on you. Like, if I were attending your wedding, I would take a lyft or uber, because I always do that if I'm planning on even having one drink (I was hit by a drunk driver when I was younger so I am definitely SUPER strict on that), but I wouldn't expect you to cover that any more than I'd expect you to pay for a garage 3 blocks away. But if I showed up and a valet you hired took my car, I would think it was weird when he then asked for $5. That's my take on the situation.
    I agree with this; either cover it or don't, but the half-paying is a little odd. I think your intention is great, but I'm afraid it's going to read exactly as @KahluaKoala said. 

    Your venue situation sounds pretty similar to ours; we had venue parking available, but it was paid; nearby garages that were cheaper, and free (but limited) street parking. We opted to pay for the valet parking at the venue for all guests (it was pretty reasonable and the venue gave us a discounted rate) since it made things much easier on our guests, but again it's not something you are obligated to do. 
    ahoyweddingshort+sassySTARMOON44
  • What is the total cost for the valet going to be for the night? There has to be something elsewhere you can cut to make up the cost, if you don't want to just let everyone fend for themselves. Honestly, 3 blocks away is pretty far for a wedding. Even as a city person, I don't expect to have to walk 3 blocks in my heels (although, I would be taking an Uber/Lyft from home or the hotel most likely, so it wouldn't matter).
    short+sassy
  • edited January 3
    So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 
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    ahoyweddingInLoveInQueensEvilSockLady
  • So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    Yes, it's on the guests to figure out how to get to a wedding. But usually we advise that couples don't throw weddings on the top of a mountain where there's an hour hike to get to the ceremony site...because it's unreasonable to expect that of your guests. And we often advise guests to get a hotel shuttle, so 100 guests aren't stuck trying to figure out how to get to the venue if everyone is staying in a local hotel. 

    In this situation, if the couple expects that a lot of their guests will be driving to the venue, it's pretty crappy hosting to not have any options other than a 3-block walk. However, if all the guests live in the city, or are from out of town and staying in the city, (and therefore no one is likely to drive) then I don't think you need to worry about parking.

    If you expect the majority of your guests need to drive to your wedding, and the only parking is 3 blocks away (regardless of if it's free or not), that's poor hosting. 
    ahoyweddingMyNameIsNot
  • STARMOON44STARMOON44
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    member
    edited January 3
    MandyMost said:
    So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    Yes, it's on the guests to figure out how to get to a wedding. But usually we advise that couples don't throw weddings on the top of a mountain where there's an hour hike to get to the ceremony site...because it's unreasonable to expect that of your guests. And we often advise guests to get a hotel shuttle, so 100 guests aren't stuck trying to figure out how to get to the venue if everyone is staying in a local hotel. 

    In this situation, if the couple expects that a lot of their guests will be driving to the venue, it's pretty crappy hosting to not have any options other than a 3-block walk. However, if all the guests live in the city, or are from out of town and staying in the city, (and therefore no one is likely to drive) then I don't think you need to worry about parking.

    If you expect the majority of your guests need to drive to your wedding, and the only parking is 3 blocks away (regardless of if it's free or not), that's poor hosting. 
    And they aren’t hosting a mountaintop wedding. They’re hosting a wedding in a city and their guests can figure out many ways to get there. It’s not poor hosting. Same as having a country club wedding in your home town where my only options are driving myself or uber isn’t poor hosting even though I don’t personally like those options. Transporting your guests to the wedding isn’t required and I find it bizarre people are so worked up about this one. 
    thisismynickname2PrettyGirlLosteileenrobcupcait927
  • So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    I think weddings are different because the guest list isn't necessarily local and they're not familiar the local transit system (or it's not available - some cities really lack this infrastructure and there's no indication where OP is from). To someone familiar with well established city life (you being from New York), this is "just how things are".

    What if this was a bride getting married in a Colorado park and the guests had to pay for a park pass (in order to park) and then walk 1/4-1/2 a mile to get to the ceremony site? We would tell that bride absolutely not. I don't really see this as much different.
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    charlotte989875
  • So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    I think weddings are different because the guest list isn't necessarily local and they're not familiar the local transit system (or it's not available - some cities really lack this infrastructure and there's no indication where OP is from). To someone familiar with well established city life (you being from New York), this is "just how things are".

    What if this was a bride getting married in a Colorado park and the guests had to pay for a park pass (in order to park) and then walk 1/4-1/2 a mile to get to the ceremony site? We would tell that bride absolutely not. I don't really see this as much different.
    I see it as completely and totally different, because in your example everyone must pay the charge, there are no other options. And in the actual wedding here, there are plenty of options available. That’s the essential factor. 
    thisismynickname2
  • So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    I think weddings are different because the guest list isn't necessarily local and they're not familiar the local transit system (or it's not available - some cities really lack this infrastructure and there's no indication where OP is from). To someone familiar with well established city life (you being from New York), this is "just how things are".

    What if this was a bride getting married in a Colorado park and the guests had to pay for a park pass (in order to park) and then walk 1/4-1/2 a mile to get to the ceremony site? We would tell that bride absolutely not. I don't really see this as much different.
    All of this. If your guest list is local friends & family who are familiar with the area and public transit/Uber, then it's not probably necessary & they'll figure it out. If a number of people are coming from OOT, then it's a nice gesture and I'd find a way to work it into the budget. My family is mostly from smaller-ish towns and could figure out public transit, but I wouldn't want them trying to figure it out for the first time in a new city while they're trying to get to my wedding.

    Personally, when I'm in a new city having to navigate parking/travel/etc I usually show up either super early or super late, and I'm the type of person that will Google map a place to investigate the parking situation. As part of the couple hosting the wedding, I wouldn't want that for my guests, and it would be stressful to me if people were rolling in late. I'd figure it out ahead of time and find a way to cover it, just as one less thing for everyone to worry about.
    charlotte989875
  • So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    I think weddings are different because the guest list isn't necessarily local and they're not familiar the local transit system (or it's not available - some cities really lack this infrastructure and there's no indication where OP is from). To someone familiar with well established city life (you being from New York), this is "just how things are".

    What if this was a bride getting married in a Colorado park and the guests had to pay for a park pass (in order to park) and then walk 1/4-1/2 a mile to get to the ceremony site? We would tell that bride absolutely not. I don't really see this as much different.
    I see it as completely and totally different, because in your example everyone must pay the charge, there are no other options. And in the actual wedding here, there are plenty of options available. That’s the essential factor. 
    Not necessarily. To someone familiar with that area, they would know that the ranger station might provide this service to elderly/disabled folks. Or they could car pool. The point is, that leaving it to guests to figure out is the problem since they may not be familiar with the area/available options. 

    I think making it easy for guests to arrive at your wedding without incurring a bunch of costs or physical exertion (whether because they're disabled or simply because they don't want to walk 3 blocks in wedding clothes/heels) is just good hosting.
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    ahoywedding
  • And they aren’t hosting a mountaintop wedding. They’re hosting a wedding in a city and their guests can figure out many ways to get there. It’s not poor hosting. Same as having a country club wedding in your home town where my only options are driving myself or uber isn’t poor hosting even though I don’t personally like those options. Transporting your guests to the wedding isn’t required and I find it bizarre people are so worked up about this one. 
    You say "guests can figure out many ways to get there". I guess that's where I disagree. If you, the host, KNOWS that the only reasonable way for guests to get to your wedding is to drive, and the only place to park is 3 blocks away, then that's shitty hosting. The same as if you are having a mountain top wedding that requires a hike to the ceremony.

    My wedding was in a city. We had some out-of-town guests, and some guests who lived in the city, and I wasn't concerned with how they'd get there. Uber, taxi, public transportation, whatever, they had plenty of options. But the majority of our guest list lived about 20-45 minutes away in the suburbs, and I KNEW they would all drive to the wedding. Yes, I suppose they could have figured out a taxi/uber (which most of them had never done before and would have been very expensive), or could have driven to a public transportation stop and then taken public transportation (which most of them had never done in the evening, if they'd ever done it at all, and would have been super inconvenient), so technically they did have options. But they weren't realistic options. So I made sure to pick a venue that had parking options, because that was good hosting.

    ahoywedding
  • MandyMost said:
    So at the heart of this is bad planning. You planned on financial promises that didn't pan out (big shocker there) and now your guests have to pay to park and walk THREE BLOCKS to your venue. It's not fair to ask elderly/disabled/injured/etc guests to pay for parking and walk 3 blocks to your venue. And please do not assume you know who is able vs. not.

    I'm not saying couples always have to have valet. They don't. BUT if your venue doesn't offer onsite parking, the closest parking is 3 blocks away, and it costs money, I do think it's on you to fix it. 

    Instead of asking his parents to take money out of their RD budget to pay for this, you should be taking money out of your budget to foot the bill. Maybe that means returning some of the accessories you bought. Maybe it means doing your own make-up. Maybe it means leveling down your flowers. Maybe it means nixing favors. 

     

    I think this is kinda (completely) ridiculous. It’s a city. Guests have all kinds of options. They can take a taxi there. Uber. Public transit. Get dropped off. NYC is full of venues that don’t have parking because that is how the city is built. It’s on the guest to figure out how to get to the wedding. You look it up and figure out a solution that works for you, and there are many. There is nothing they need to fix here. 
    Yes, it's on the guests to figure out how to get to a wedding. But usually we advise that couples don't throw weddings on the top of a mountain where there's an hour hike to get to the ceremony site...because it's unreasonable to expect that of your guests. And we often advise guests to get a hotel shuttle, so 100 guests aren't stuck trying to figure out how to get to the venue if everyone is staying in a local hotel. 

    In this situation, if the couple expects that a lot of their guests will be driving to the venue, it's pretty crappy hosting to not have any options other than a 3-block walk. However, if all the guests live in the city, or are from out of town and staying in the city, (and therefore no one is likely to drive) then I don't think you need to worry about parking.

    If you expect the majority of your guests need to drive to your wedding, and the only parking is 3 blocks away (regardless of if it's free or not), that's poor hosting. 
    And they aren’t hosting a mountaintop wedding. They’re hosting a wedding in a city and their guests can figure out many ways to get there. It’s not poor hosting. Same as having a country club wedding in your home town where my only options are driving myself or uber isn’t poor hosting even though I don’t personally like those options. Transporting your guests to the wedding isn’t required and I find it bizarre people are so worked up about this one. 
    Also, it's not HOW they're getting to the wedding. It's once they're THERE, do they have to incur any costs? I think the answer should be no. 

    Nobody expects that a couple will pay for everyone's transportation to/from the wedding (e.g. Uber, sending a car, providing prepaid metro tickets, etc.). But I would expect that whether I drive or bike or take my segway to a wedding that I won't need to incur additional costs once I'm at the venue. AND that I won't have to hike in cocktail dress and heels to get there. 
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    charlotte989875MandyMostahoyweddingJen4948
  • Good grief. How is walking 3 blocks in heels not ok, but standing around in heels for cocktail hour or dancing for a few hours in heels IS ok?

    I completely agree that if the venue requires paid parking (i.e. state park), the host should pay it. But if your venue does not require paid parking, all transit costs are on the guest. If they do not like the available transportation format or costs associated, they can choose not to come. 

    If everyone had this thinking that 3 blocks isn't "right" then no venue in any city would ever have business and all weddings would be in banquet halls with massive parking lots. Eye roll. 

    3 blocks isn't "right" when you know most of your guests will be driving AND you had the option, but turned it down, to have valet parking on site.

    I've personally never driven to a city venue and then had to walk 3 blocks to the wedding--I've been to city venues  where I took a taxi/uber from a hotel, was provided transportation from a hotel, valet parked after driving from home, or parked at an onsite or adjacent garage after driving from home. Have you ever had to walk 3 blocks to a wedding?

    Point being: there are plenty of ways that city venues without onsite parking can have weddings without requiring guests to walk 3 blocks. 
  • MandyMost said:
    Good grief. How is walking 3 blocks in heels not ok, but standing around in heels for cocktail hour or dancing for a few hours in heels IS ok?

    I completely agree that if the venue requires paid parking (i.e. state park), the host should pay it. But if your venue does not require paid parking, all transit costs are on the guest. If they do not like the available transportation format or costs associated, they can choose not to come. 

    If everyone had this thinking that 3 blocks isn't "right" then no venue in any city would ever have business and all weddings would be in banquet halls with massive parking lots. Eye roll. 

    3 blocks isn't "right" when you know most of your guests will be driving AND you had the option, but turned it down, to have valet parking on site.

    I've personally never driven to a city venue and then had to walk 3 blocks to the wedding--I've been to city venues  where I took a taxi/uber from a hotel, was provided transportation from a hotel, valet parked after driving from home, or parked at an onsite or adjacent garage after driving from home. Have you ever had to walk 3 blocks to a wedding?

    Point being: there are plenty of ways that city venues without onsite parking can have weddings without requiring guests to walk 3 blocks. 
    Like this one!!! There is no reason why her guests can’t uber or taxi if they don’t want to walk three blocks. 
    PrettyGirlLosteileenrob
  • Good grief. How is walking 3 blocks in heels not ok, but standing around in heels for cocktail hour or dancing for a few hours in heels IS ok?

    I completely agree that if the venue requires paid parking (i.e. state park), the host should pay it. But if your venue does not require paid parking, all transit costs are on the guest. If they do not like the available transportation format or costs associated, they can choose not to come. 

    If everyone had this thinking that 3 blocks isn't "right" then no venue in any city would ever have business and all weddings would be in banquet halls with massive parking lots. Eye roll. 
    Because there should be seats for every guest and they can sit down?
    southernbelle0915ahoyweddingJen4948SP29
  • Good grief. How is walking 3 blocks in heels not ok, but standing around in heels for cocktail hour or dancing for a few hours in heels IS ok? Because elderly/disabled/injured people literally can't. Plusandalso, even able people might choose to not stand or dance for a few hours.

    I completely agree that if the venue requires paid parking (i.e. state park), the host should pay it. But if your venue does not require paid parking, all transit costs are on the guest. If they do not like the available transportation format or costs associated, they can choose not to come. But it's the same thing. The only available parking (in both situations) costs money. So why should they have to pay it at a park but not at a city? 

    If everyone had this thinking that 3 blocks isn't "right" then no venue in any city would ever have business and all weddings would be in banquet halls with massive parking lots. Eye roll. 
    I'm actually really surprised by the responses on here.

    If someone came to the etiquette board and was like "I booked a venue that has no parking and didn't properly budget to host any kind of alternative. My inlaws won't give us more money to pay for it and we can't (read: won't) adjust our budget to pay for it. The only available parking costs $10 and is 1/4-1/2 mile away (depending on the size of the city blocks). Is it ok to ask them to pay for this and to walk to my wedding?"

    We'd be like "Um no. 1) great example on planning on promises, now it's up to you and 2) You should have booked a venue with parking. And if you booked a venue without parking, you should have budgeted for valet or a shuttle."
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    ahoyweddingMyNameIsNot
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    member
    Good grief. How is walking 3 blocks in heels not ok, but standing around in heels for cocktail hour or dancing for a few hours in heels IS ok?

    I completely agree that if the venue requires paid parking (i.e. state park), the host should pay it. But if your venue does not require paid parking, all transit costs are on the guest. If they do not like the available transportation format or costs associated, they can choose not to come. 

    If everyone had this thinking that 3 blocks isn't "right" then no venue in any city would ever have business and all weddings would be in banquet halls with massive parking lots. Eye roll. 
    Because there should be seats for every guest and they can sit down?
    I've literally never been to a wedding where cocktail hour had a seat for every butt. (Except my own because cocktail hour and dinner were in the same room.) And the time it takes to dance to Baby Got Back is longer than a 3 block walk. 

    I'm just saying that someone walking 3 blocks to the venue isn't the end of the world. A good host will pay for valet if valet services are available at all, that I do believe. But making a big deal about the nearest parking lot not being adjacent to the venue is just overblowing here. 
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    STARMOON44PrettyGirlLost
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