Wedding Woes

Weird dog story for the morning

Dear Prudence: 
Recently, my family lost our beloved dog Pauliver. Paulie lived to the ripe old age of 12 and had to be put down due to a terminal illness. I loved Paulie and miss him dearly. I am glad I was able to be there for the last moments of his life. My sister was also there—but she wanted to take Paulie’s body home and spend one last night with him! He used to sleep in bed with her and she wanted to say goodbye. The vet told us that the body could attract flies and “get messy” soon, and I suggested that we should take him home and bury him right away instead. My sister agreed. We said our goodbyes, buried him, each tossed a handful of dirt on his grave, and planted flowers. Two days later I saw something she posted online that said she had dug up our dog, taken him to a crematorium, and had another funeral, all without telling me. She wrote at length about how we “did it all wrong.” I feel like she blames me. I thought we were doing the right thing, but I’ll admit I’ve never handled a dead body before. Whenever a loved one of mine passed we always let the funeral home take care of it. Was I wrong? Should I have let her take the body home? Am I a monster for not feeling connected to a loved one’s body after they die? —Pet Sematary

Re: Weird dog story for the morning

  • why didn't they just have the vet cremate the dog? when we had to put Rogue down, they made a cast of her paw for us and then sent her to be cremated. we picked up her ashes and paw print a week or so later.
  • I have to say that we've had all of our pet deaths in the winter, but, in every case, the body came home with us and waited overnight to be buried--and wasn't supremely gross (it was wrapped up very carefully and kept in the garage.  After the kiddo got a chance to see it, because we were trying to help her deal w/ that).
    But I also live in the frigid northland where, if y'all remember, we had to start a bonfire to melt enough earth to be able to dig a grave.  

    I wouldn't keep it in the house, or sleep with it (because South Park is somewhat accurate) but, wanting some time isn't out of the question, IMO.  But the 'please let me do this burial ASAP' is just as valid a coping mech.

    But digging it up is all sorts of WTFery.
  • @gbck - yeah, i can understand your reasoning - i just don't get carting the dog home and then exhuming it to take it to the vet and get it cremated. 
  • Am I the only one who wonders "Didn't she notice the ground looked different?" after the sister dug the dog up...  js...  And creepy sister - SNS...
  • Everyone deals with loss different - pet or otherwise. LW shouldn't feel bad, but sister is a bit odd for doing that and IMHO that was kinda rude to do.

    Like @*Barbie* said, why didn't they ask to cremate the dog?
  • There is so much weird in this I almost can't even. Sister is obviously a few sandwiches short of a picnic for wanting to sleep with a dog corpse, so idk that I'm taking her FB rant seriously anyway. 

    But these two obviously have deeper communications issues. Before they get another dog, they need to discuss canine advanced directives and maybe even make a will (I feel ridiculous typing that). 
    This is going to be my new favourite saying :')
  • There is so much weird in this I almost can't even. Sister is obviously a few sandwiches short of a picnic for wanting to sleep with a dog corpse, so idk that I'm taking her FB rant seriously anyway. 

    But these two obviously have deeper communications issues. Before they get another dog, they need to discuss canine advanced directives and maybe even make a will (I feel ridiculous typing that). 
    So I interpreted from the letter that this was a family dog - and that they (and I assume) their parents got this dog together when the LW and the sister were minors. 

    Hopefully now that they are adults, and now knowing that the LW's sister wanted to sleep with the dog corpse (I CANNOT believe I just typed that - seriously WTELF) the LW will get their own dog independent from the sister.
  • I'm with @southernbelle0915.

    I would find it REALLY hard to take anyone seriously who wanted to take home a dead dog to sleep with it one more time.   To then find out that she exhumed the dead dog from ground to have it cremated elicits thoughts of both anger and confusion that the sister herself was incredibly self-centered to desecrate the dog's grave and body.  

    I don't think the LW did anything wrong and I think the sister herself did.    I probably would not seek any kind of discussion with my sister on this.   I would hope that those who see her on social media posting would also scratch their heads rather than think that the LW did something wrong.

    I can tell you that I'd hesitate to put my sister in any kind of position of authority in my life if that's how she behaves.     


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