A disguise is the best you can come up with?

mrsconn23

Dear Prudence,

I used to work at a restaurant. I loved it but left when my dream job opened up. I used to visit there frequently to eat. I told an old co-worker, Mike, that I was selling my house, and he put in an offer, which I accepted. It seemed perfect, but things soured quickly. Mike called and texted me constantly about issues with the sale rather than talking to my realtor. Negotiations got heated and personal, and I told Mike not to contact me again. He turned icy. While I’m glad I stuck up for myself, I feel anxious about ever going back to the restaurant. It’s a small place with a small staff, so the odds of seeing Mike are high. I wish I was the kind of person who could flounce in and relish watching him serve me after being a jerk, but I’m leaning more toward investing in a good disguise. What else can I do that doesn’t involve spirit gum prosthetics?

—Can’t Go Home Again

ShesSoCold

Two options - get a backbone, or order carry out.

charlotte989875

If Mike is a professional he'll treat you like he would any other customer. If not, then it's going to be super awkward and you can leave. 

Either you let a potentially awkward situation keep you from going to a restaurant you like, or you suck it up and act like an adult. If Mike is rude, ignore him and move on. 

banana468

I don't know -  you could be direct?   You could ask for a different waiter?   You could tell Mike that you didn't appreciate his tactics? 

But I suppose if  you don't want to get into prosthetics then consider this:

mrsconn23

If Mike was really that nasty, it's possible he's poisoned the well at the restaurant with regard to LW?  

Also, this goes to show that if you want to do a business deal with a friend or family member, dealing with it professionally is the way to go.  LW should have referred Mike to their realtor for ev-ery-thing.  

Honestly, LW sounds really immature since they literally cannot come up with any other scenario to go back besides a disguise and that they don't think they were an asshole at all in this situation.  

VarunaTT

In my head, Mike is the chef and there is no way in hell I would go to any restaurant where I knew the chef could maybe might possibly have a personal vendetta against me.  Mike's past behavior sounds unprofessional AF, so I wouldn't put it past him at all.

Time to find a new favorite restaurant.

MyNameIsNot

4 restaurants? Eat someplace else if you don't want to see Mike. 

FWIW, I don't eat at any of the 3 restaurants that I worked at in my 20's anymore. Not because there's bad blood, it's just annoying and awkward when people you vaguely remember but weren't close enough to talk to outside of work keep coming up to talk to you while you're just trying to eat. 

short+sassy

MyNameIsNot said:

4 restaurants? Eat someplace else if you don't want to see Mike. 

FWIW, I don't eat at any of the 3 restaurants that I worked at in my 20's anymore. Not because there's bad blood, it's just annoying and awkward when people you vaguely remember but weren't close enough to talk to outside of work keep coming up to talk to you while you're just trying to eat. 

This is EXACTLY what I was thinking, lol.

I am curious what is SO special about this restaurant that the LW apparently can't fathom giving it up.

A former coworker told me a funny story.  She was (at the time) young, naïve, and buying her first house.  She bought it from a coworker at her first job out of college (not where we were working).  Her and her H excitedly went to their new house after closing and found a disaster.

Get this!  Apparently, the last time her coworker had painted the interior, they hadn't bothered to move anything away from the walls.  So the walls were two different colors, with the old color being an outline of all the furniture.  Even the stereo and tv hadn't been removed.  They had an outline also, lol.

Telling me the story many years later, she thought it was hilarious.  But, at the time, she said she just stood in the living room and burst into tears.  She mentioned she had to make a concerted effort for awhile to not let her anger at this coworker effect their work.