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Post wedding blues?

hello
so my wedding was just this past September. We had a rustic barn venue and it was the perfect day and everything i had envisioned. A few weeks after returning from our honey moon i was feeling sad it was all over but i think what’s made it harder for me is that we have a had a few engagements in the family just this month on my husbands side. I come from a smaller family so for us our wedding was such a big deal and my family and I still love to talk about it while his side we went right to planning new weddings. We haven’t even gotten our photos back yet and i was looking forward to sharing them with his family and reminiscing This sounds so awful and I’m like what has gotten into me why do i care mines over now it’s someone else’s turn but Im still on my wedding bliss and not ready to stop talking about how wonderful of a day we had. Anyone ever go through something similar? Comparing weddings. I’m not a person who usually cares about stuff like this but i can’t stop this feeling.

Answers

  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold bend over and I'll show ya mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    dh961182 said:
    hello
    so my wedding was just this past September. We had a rustic barn venue and it was the perfect day and everything i had envisioned. A few weeks after returning from our honey moon i was feeling sad it was all over but i think what’s made it harder for me is that we have a had a few engagements in the family just this month on my husbands side. I come from a smaller family so for us our wedding was such a big deal and my family and I still love to talk about it while his side we went right to planning new weddings. We haven’t even gotten our photos back yet and i was looking forward to sharing them with his family and reminiscing This sounds so awful and I’m like what has gotten into me why do i care mines over now it’s someone else’s turn but Im still on my wedding bliss and not ready to stop talking about how wonderful of a day we had. Anyone ever go through something similar? Comparing weddings. I’m not a person who usually cares about stuff like this but i can’t stop this feeling.

    I was definitely sad once our wedding was over. I think it's a common feeling, especially when you've put so much time and effort into it. But just because others are now engaged doesn't mean your "bliss" has to end. Keep talking about the day with your H. Getting the photos back is a lot of fun. You'll probably then be picking out which ones you want for an album (if you've opted to do that). 

    Don't compare your weddings to others. You said yourself that it was a beautiful day. Focus on that, on the good, on what you enjoyed. Also, it helped me to have another project to focus on. Find something else to put your energy into. 
    Yes, yes and yes to the bolded. 

    I felt relieved that our wedding was finally over and done, so I didn't get any post-wedding sadness, but I can see where others would. 

    Definitely find something new to focus on. Generally, I operate much smoother and feel so much more productive when I have a big long-term goal I'm working towards. It's easy to just be stagnant and sad when you've completed this huge thing that encompassed your entire life and now it's just over. 
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
    charlotte989875
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam Chicagoburbs member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    I was sad too.  I'm such a planner and actually enjoyed planning and anticipating the wedding.

    Now, I'm focusing on planning vacations with the H and I.  Just as fun. 

    ernursejcharlotte989875
  • I didn’t personally feel the way you feel, but it’s common and understandable that you do.  As PP have said, receiving the wedding photos should be fun.  I loved the planning piece and all of the hoopla surrounding my own wedding, and I was actually in three more weddings (including MOH in one of my sister’s) within the next eight months.  It was really nice to be throwing pre-wedding parties and going to fittings, etc. without being the center of attention so to speak.  So maybe the cousins of H’s side being engaged can be a fun way to keep some of the wedding spirit alive?
    short+sassy
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I get it. You spend upwards of a year and a whole lot of money on the perfect, for you day, all the while you were looking forward to seeing it all come to fruition. As wonderful as it was, it was over in 6 hours and then what? I remember feeling that way after I recuperated from my daughter's wedding. 

    I feel the same way about vacations. We like to cruise. I book about a year out and spend lots of time shopping for excursions, airfare, hotel and tweaking my cruise wardrobe. Then it's over in a week or two. The day after a cruise, I'm shopping for the next one. It doesn't matter how far out the next one is, as long as we know there is a next one. Maybe you could start researching your next vacation?


                
    eileenrobcharlotte989875short+sassy
  • Thank you ladies so much i love the idea of planning and focusing on the next thing. I’m def a planner and I’m like what do i do now that’s it over!!! I def need to plan something to keep myself busy
    eileenrobMairePoppyshort+sassy
  • dh961182 said:
    hello
    so my wedding was just this past September. We had a rustic barn venue and it was the perfect day and everything i had envisioned. A few weeks after returning from our honey moon i was feeling sad it was all over but i think what’s made it harder for me is that we have a had a few engagements in the family just this month on my husbands side. I come from a smaller family so for us our wedding was such a big deal and my family and I still love to talk about it while his side we went right to planning new weddings. We haven’t even gotten our photos back yet and i was looking forward to sharing them with his family and reminiscing This sounds so awful and I’m like what has gotten into me why do i care mines over now it’s someone else’s turn but Im still on my wedding bliss and not ready to stop talking about how wonderful of a day we had. Anyone ever go through something similar? Comparing weddings. I’m not a person who usually cares about stuff like this but i can’t stop this feeling.

    I wanted to add that I'm sure many of his family members will enjoy this also!  You and your H definitely will.

    Congrats!  I'm glad your all's wedding day went so well and was so happy.

    My H and I celebrated our 5-year anniversary in June and we still sometimes reminisce about what a wonderful and joyful day it was. 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Yep!  You're normal!  It's an interesting void that no one talks about, OTOH, now's the time to plan your next long-term project.  It's the "something to look forward to" project that needs to be done in stages.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • downtondivadowntondiva member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited October 2018
    I found it a little bittersweet when my wedding was over. I was beyond thrilled with how it all went, but it was a little sad not having it to look forward to anymore. But my husband and I still enjoy revisiting our wedding day and how wonderful it was. As more of our friends and relatives get engaged and married, their happiness brings back those happy memories for us too.

    When you say "comparing weddings," do you mean that it's just a bummer that someone else's wedding is getting more attention now, or do you mean that you feel self-conscious about how your wedding may or may not be different from others in your husband's family? 

    If it's the former-sorry to be blunt-you really need to move on. Be happy that your wedding was what you hoped it would be, accept that it's over now, and let other people have their excitement for their own events. If it's the latter, don't do that to yourself. My brother and I had very different weddings, and his was definitely bigger and more elaborate than mine. Neither was the "right" or "wrong" way to have a wedding; they were just different. If your big day was what you wanted, it doesn't matter if someone else is doing something bigger, fancier, whatever. You had the day that made you happy.
    image
    ILoveBeachMusicshort+sassy
  • My daughter got married in August, and I was the one feeling a little sad when it was all over. I think it's natural when you've been focused on the planning for so long, and then the thing you've planned comes to fruition. And then what? I agree with the others that planning another long-term project is helpful.
    MesmrEweshort+sassy
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