Military Brides

where do we have the wedding!

 My FI and I are newly engaged, and are planning an Oct. wedding but the problem is he is the Air Force and his family is from Ga, and my Family is from Ky. I want to have it in KY but he wants it in either TN, NC,SC..but I have looked at those places and the money starts to add up..and suggestions?

Re: where do we have the wedding!

  • calindicalindi
    5000 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Why does he want it in one of those 3 states?  What's his reasoning?

    Your options are to have it where your family is from, his family is from, you both live, or a destination wedding.  If it's closer to one family than the other, chances are the guests who attend will be a little skewed towards that family.  If it's closer to you, it's easier to plan.

    What do you both want?  Do you want a small, medium, or large wedding (how many guests invited)?  Do you want a casual or fancy wedding?  Indoors/outdoors?  Religious or secular?  What's your budget?  These things are important, and will help establish where you want to get married.

    If he wants a wedding "in the middle" so everyone has to travel, then EVERYONE has to get a hotel, too.  It might be more fair, but it's not necessarily cheaper.

    Anyway, once you figure out what you want, you can check out the local boards for those areas to chat with ladies to find out where the good deals are and the affordable vendors.  Good luck!



  • edited December 2011
    Traditionally, the wedding occurs in the area the bride is from since it was usually the bride's parents footing the bill.  Obviously things are a lot different these days with the bride and groom paying for their own wedding or both sets of parents contributing.  Your situation is similar to mine, my FI's family is across the country but my family is local.  No matter what you do, someone is going to be travelling and if you try to have it in between then EVERYONE will be travelling including you (making it a destination wedding).  Are you currently living in KY?  If you are, it'll probably be easiest to plan something near you since you'll be able to meet with vendors more easily.  Just sit down with you FI (if he isn't deployed) and discuss the logistics of having it in each location.  If there's a location that has special meaning to him then it is something to consider, but don't break the bank trying to please everyone with the "halfway-in-between" option.  Good luck!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    Thanks, Ladies. Yes, I do currently live in KY and he wants the places to be in between for each family. But, it will be easier for me to plan from here. I think I am going to have to just be stern and tell him we are having it here. So, I will keep ya updated.
  • edited December 2011
    I found that it was easier to plan in the state I was living in, but an option that might appeal to both you and your FI is looking into a resort or somewhere (especially on the Coast of the Carolinas) Alot of hotels/resorts offer wedding packages. Mine did, and even though we didn't go with a specific package, it provided us the contact for the wedding planner. Having a resort/hotel wedding or reception in one of the locations your FI is suggesting is a good idea because, while I loved everyone and everything about my wedding, due to the location(WA) My southern family didn't have the means or want to travel that close to Christmas. Our wedding had my immediate family, a few friends, but it was mostly my Hubby's family. Just a warning that if you have the wedding where you live, you run the risk of the sides of the wedding being seriously uneven. Hubby and I didn't care, because the people most important to us were there. I know it's closer and easier to plan where you live, but you run the risk of an uneven guest list. It doesn't hurt to check out the Carolinas!! (I'm kind of a Carolina Girl, Carolina by way of Alabama) Just check it out!!
  • kara811kara811
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I would also have it in the state you live in. We were in the same situation, our families live in different states. I chose to plan it here where I leave, that way it's equal on both sides of the family to travel and the planning is just easier that way. Especially since I'm planning it all on my own. Good Luck! 
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