Military Brides

Re: .

  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    member
    edited December 2011
    10 grand on a honeymoon (or 15-20 k on a wedding) using the tax free money from an enlisted deployment makes me want to cry. I would halve that (or at least reduce it) and toss the rest into a retirement fund or other investment. But, that's not what you asked. As for the actual questions, I would figure out what city/area you want to get married in and post on the local board for beach recommendations. Your other question can be answered by the County Clerk http://www.stateofflorida.com/Portal/DesktopDefault.aspx?tabid=51.


    I hate Dave Ramsey
  • edited December 2011
    Wow. Stan's right, thats a huge chunk of change to spend on a honeymoon. And you can do nice weddings really cheap. My wedding was everything I wanted and it was in the 5 grand window, plus we got to share our big day with our familes and that means so much to me.. Did you know that most Military couples don't even get a honeymoon? How long will your 10 grand honeymoon be? I would hope like a month for that kind of money. I would put some serious thought to all of that. 10 grand could be the down payment on a house. You could buy a car, just think of all the things you could do with 10 grand that would last much longer than a honeymoon. Anyway.
    Check out the local florida boards, also google (I am a huge fan of Google). You might be able to find a resort that offers an elopement package. The hotel that I got married at had an elopement package for $1,000, and it included the officiant, a cake, $200 to spend in the restaurant or spa and a room for the night. Check that out. Also, look at officiants in Florida and tell them what you want to do and I'm sure they can help make it happen. GL
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Florida wedding?:
    But we both decided that we'd rather spend 10 grand on a luxurious honeymoon for us rather than 15-20 on a huge wedding for everyone else. The only way we could afford it was with the deployment money. I think my love deserves this... ;) 
    Posted by HaleyC2012
     
    Also, and maybe I'm the only person that was/will be confused by this, but what do you mean Your Love deserves this? Please clarify this... It sounds to me like you mean that YOU deserve for your FI to spend the 10 grand he will make for being deployed on you. Tell me, if that is what you mean, why do you deserve that? or is it you that is being deployed? I guess I'm just confused on what you mean. Perhaps you just mean that HE deserves this vacay after being deployed. Maybe I'm just having a ditzy moment, but I wanted to ask you to clarify this before I got the wrong impression... Thanks!
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  • HaleyC2012HaleyC2012
    First Comment
    member
    edited December 2011
    Uhm wow okay. SInce i guess your confused right? 
    My honeymoon will last 4 days longer than a wedding... You spent 5 thousand on your wedding right, that lasted what, 6 or 7 hours? That already seems like a better investment to me. excuse the attitude i just dont really appreciate the snarky remarks and i dont remember asking for approval on my budget. The 10 grand is not just a number i came up with. My Fiance looked and found a resort that he loves in a place he's always wanted to go...so to answer your question... Yes, this is his vacation. He was the one who wanted to  spend the money on a get away for US then a bunch of money on a wedding where after 7 hours it will be over. I dont recall asking any questions about my honeymoon.. The subject line was florida in case you missed it. As for buying a car or house or whatever... I have a car thanks. :) And it would be so stupid for us to buy a house.... Uhm active duty... We will be gone in a matter of 2 year.  Correct me if im wrong but are you just upset that im having a honeymoon because thats what im gathering from this... I dont know how "most military couples not having a honeymoon"  has anything to do with me. Did you not have one? Thats what it seems like. I'm sorry you couldnt afford it but we can so i'd appreciate it if you would lose the judgement. 
    You can spend your money on a wedding but because i'd rather have a nice honeymoon, I'm wrong? 
    Did you think of all the things you could have bought with your 5 grand? You could have just went to the court house & used the money on a car.... Thats pretty much what your saying to me right. I dont think you thought about what you wrote. i'd appreciate it if you saved the conspiracy theories for someone else. 
    Congrats on your dream wedding for 5 grand tho. Sounds like you got a steal. I couldnt even find a descent venue where i live for that. 

    I
  • HaleyC2012HaleyC2012
    First Comment
    member
    edited December 2011
    This is what my honeymoon will include. Just so we're clear, Its not im not going to vegas for the weekend to blow my Fiance's money.
    Maybe you should check it out before you bash me for having this "stupid" idea.




    Accommodation 

    A welcome bottle of Champagne & Chocolates on arrival

    Discover hidden bays by dinghy and indulge in a gourmet picnic

    Two spa treatments up to a maximum of 1 hour per treatment

    A romantic private dinner for two

    Daily gourmet meals, 3 meals per day

    A selected range of premium alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages

    Selected island activities including motorised dinghies, snorkelling, fishing, tennis, self-guided nature walks, gourmet picnic hampers.


    There are other rooms for cheaper but my FH wants his own waterfall. :) So thats what he is gonna get, Because HE DESERVES IT! And with the 20% military discount off of our honeymoon package they are giving him i believe it puts it right under 9. So yes, i choose this over a wedding. 



  • Beachy730Beachy730
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re:.:
    This is what my honeymoon will include. Just so we're clear, Its not im not going to vegas for the weekend to blow my Fiance's money. Maybe you should check it out before you bash me for having this "stupid" idea. http://www.bedarra.com.au/accommodation/the-pavilions/ Accommodation  A welcome bottle of Champagne & Chocolates on arrival Discover hidden bays by dinghy and indulge in a gourmet picnic Two spa treatments up to a maximum of 1 hour per treatment A romantic private dinner for two Daily gourmet meals,  3 meals per day A selected range of premium alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages Selected island activities including motorised dinghies, snorkelling, fishing, tennis, self-guided nature walks, gourmet picnic hampers. There are other rooms for cheaper but my FH wants his own waterfall. :) So thats what he is gonna get, Because HE DESERVES IT! And with the 20% military discount off of our  honeymoon  package they are giving him i believe it puts it right under 9. So yes, i choose this over a wedding. 
    Posted by HaleyC2012

    I don't even know what your original question was since you DD'd it.  Which is very rude by the way.  But when you come around the boards slinging around dollar amounts, it usually doesn't sit well with people.  As Stan said (I think it was Stan, I quoted so I can't see), many military couples don't even get a honeymoon, so to come on here bragging about how much you're going to spend on it is really rude.  There is a honeymoon board will people love to brag about their honeymoons.  

    Since you started mentioning dollar amounts and what you think is wasting money, I'll add in on that.  I never talk about the cost of our wedding, but fine.  Our wedding ended up costing us about $25k.  It was very important to us to have all of our family and friends with us for our wedding day, and it was kind of our last hoorah before we moved cross country and H got deployed.  We passed on a honeymoon for the time being, because while we could have easily said screw everyone that we love and who would love to see us get married lets engorge ourselves on our honeymoon, that would have been a selfish thing to do.  I don't regret for a second how we spent our wedding money, and that we didn't have a honeymoon yet.  We plan on taking one between deployments this year, and we won't even come close to hitting $10k.  

    And just for the record, the quality of your honeymoon, the cost you spend on it, or if you even have one has no bearing on the success or greatness of your marriage.  If you want to blow $10k for 6 days, then so be it.  Hopefully you have great memories from it.  But I bet they can never beat the memories I have of sharing my wedding day with everyone I love and cherish.
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  • HaleyC2012HaleyC2012
    First Comment
    member
    edited December 2011
    Honestly i deleted it because i was just gonna say the hell with it all. and get rid of the account. but i decided to just say what i thought because it was completely rude. I wasnt trying to offend anyone i was just stating what i was doing. the girl accused me of using my finace for his money when i said he deserved this trip so yes i did get a little upset. I felt attacked on the sole reason of me wanting a honeymoon instead. My fiance was the one who wated this so i dont understand why its so bad... I said we would rather spend 10 on a honeymoon than on a wedding. thats just our preferance. I didnt ask anything about my honeymoon i asked about beaches and marriage licenses.  But i got attacked for trying to make my fiance happy. Im happy you loved your wedding but if i was to have a wedding it would have been for the guest more than us. I was told to use the money on a car or house.. would it have been different if i wanted to spend 10 thousand on a wedding? And she was the one who said something about people not having a honeymoon. i dont see how that is in any way my fault. trying to bash me for wanting a honeymoon is ridiculous... i still dont see why its so wrong for us to spend our money on a honeymoon instead of a wedding. whats the difference? 
  • HaleyC2012HaleyC2012
    First Comment
    member
    edited December 2011
    and the family thing.... he has literally has maybe 10 family members... in florida where we are going. my parents and my sister are going to go too... so its not selfish. but its something my fiance wants so thats what we are doing... im happy you all have family to spend it with but we really dont have any. so we're going to florida to marry on a beach on then going on our honeymoon. I dont see whats so wrong with it.
  • Beachy730Beachy730
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    If that's what you both want to do, then fine.  Personally do I think it's ridiculous to spend that on a vacation?  Yes.  But there are many people who think the amount we spend on our wedding is ridiculous, but that was our choice.  And if you only have a small family, then it's more understandable.  My immediate family alone is about 45 people, and even after making lots of cuts our guest list was at 275, so we never could have considered a small wedding.  

    $10k just seems outrageous to most people for a vacation who aren't making absurd amounts of money, and one that isn't weeks or even months long.  And most people have way more things to spend that money on when they are in the military and (I'm assuming) fairly young.  

    I definitely suggest you lurk on some boards before posting.  This is definitely not the type of board where you would want to post about an extravagant honeymoon, especially since most people didn't get one.  Explore the other boards on the knot, and ask about your honeymoon on the honeymoon board and the local board for where you are going.  You are free to post wherever you want, but on a board like this you are likely to get reactions like you did.  I never post about my wedding on this board because I know there are many brides who chose to do very small  weddings, or never got the opportunity to do the big wedding and regret it.  We were fortunate enough with H being on shore duty during our wedding that we could plan an amazing wedding with no fear of deployment and schedule changes (after we changed it once), but most military couples don't have that luxury.  So I feel like talking about it on this board seems like bragging or throwing it in people's faces sometimes.  That's why there are specific boards on here for different things.
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  • calindicalindi
    5000 Comments Second Anniversary Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    Wow.... you'll kill a lot of bees with that vinegar.  Try some sugar instead?  Might get you further.

    Listen, from someone who is most decidedly NOT jealous (just trust me on this - anything more would sound like bragging, which unlike you, I prefer not to do), let me tell you that you can make whatever choices you want for budgeting wedding vs. honeymoon, but using all that deployment money for a honeymoon is a rather immature financial decision.  There's got to be some places you could compromise without missing out on the experience that wouldn't deplete what should be in a savings account.  A waterfall in the room?  Seriously?  That's why you're going to blow $9k?

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  • iluvmytxrgriluvmytxrgr
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    member
    edited December 2011
    I'm seeing an awful lot of wah wah wah me me me I I I wah wah wah bee bee-ness.  Holy cow!


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  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    member
    edited December 2011
    Meh, I wasn't even mean, it's strange for you to get that defensive. I just hate to see an enlisted Soldier and a young bride enter marriage making a rash financial decision like that. Nor did I say you should spend it on a wedding. 15-20k (as you said in your op) on a wedding is a rash decision too. Deployment money is hard earned, and I see poor decisions made all the time with it. I simply said I would invest it so it would appreciate. And then I answered your questions.

    ETA: I believe travel is awesome, I think it's important to do when you're young, I think travel should even be a line item in your budget. I just think that's too much to spend without a much larger salary.
    I hate Dave Ramsey
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to Re:.:
    Honestly i deleted it because i was just gonna say the hell with it all. and get rid of the account. but i decided to just say what i thought because it was completely rude. I wasnt trying to offend anyone i was just stating what i was doing. the girl accused me of using my finace for his money when i said he deserved this trip so yes i did get a little upset. I felt attacked on the sole reason of me wanting a honeymoon instead. My fiance was the one who wated this so i dont understand why its so bad... I said we would rather spend 10 on a honeymoon than on a wedding. thats just our preferance. I didnt ask anything about my honeymoon i asked about beaches and marriage licenses.  But i got attacked for trying to make my fiance happy. Im happy you loved your wedding but if i was to have a wedding it would have been for the guest more than us. I was told to use the money on a car or house.. would it have been different if i wanted to spend 10 thousand on a wedding? And she was the one who said something about people not having a honeymoon. i dont see how that is in any way my fault. trying to bash me for wanting a honeymoon is ridiculous... i still dont see why its so wrong for us to spend our money on a honeymoon instead of a wedding. whats the difference? 
    Posted by HaleyC2012
    I did not "attack" you nor did I "accuse" you of anything. I asked you a question. I asked what you meant by "My Love deserves it". I am sorry that you took what I said as an attack & an accusation, that was not my intent at all.  While I'm on the subject though, yes I did, I had a perfectly wonderful honeymoon. My honeymoon lasted alot longer than 4 days and was alot cheaper than 10k, but I don't like to brag, apparently something we don't have in common. Please don't Ahem me about moving and such, My husband and I are BOTH active duty. I didn't say your honeymoon idea was stupid, so please do not put words in my mouth. Please do us all a favor, and just grow up. I asked you a question and that was it. Get over yourself Drama Queen.
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