Military Brides

Planning troubles

So, my FI is in the Army. We're newly engaged and looking to get married in the Spring. Around the end of May early June. You all already know the colors for ARMY. I thought that I wanted my girls to be in DK Purple, but I got to talking to one of my bridesmaids and she wasn't happy with the color and suggested Black. Now He will be in his Class A's and the guys will be in the original Army BDU's. So now I'm just kind of clueless. Plus It's an outside wedding, and I'm getting a bit frustrated over the shoes.....Flip Flops? Wedges are almost out bc I can't find any that are cute and solid color under like 45.00. So Idk. I really need help! Any type of suggestions would be VERY helpful and appreciated!
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Re: Planning troubles

  • edited December 2011
    I'm not sure about your color situation, but if it were me, I'd just pick a color and say that's what you want and leave it at that.

    For the shoes, could you go with ballet flats? I'm personally against flip-flops for a wedding because 1) They cause women to waddle, and 2) They seem a bit too casual for a wedding where everyone is dressed up. At the very most, flip-flops should be reserved for the reception.
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  • Sammy0709Sammy0709
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    edited December 2011
    Flip flops also make noise when you walk.  Granted there will be music playing but depending on the volume you may still hear them.
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  • calindicalindi
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    edited December 2011
    I'd say just tell the women you'd like them to wear shoes in X color.  Otherwise, leave it up to them to pick out shoes.  They'll each pay what they feel comfortable, and will hopefully pick out shoes that they'll actually be able to wear again.  It's just an additional stress that you don't need, and no one will really notice what's on their feet.

    Also, your colors don't have to "match" the uniform.  Uniforms are meant to go with everything, and I think it would be a shame to put all that effort into trying to match it, as military uniforms aren't exactly in flattering colors for a wedding.  Personally, I like shades of yellow or red with most of the uniforms, but you really don't have to match them at all.  Figure out what colors YOU want, then go with that.  I think yellow and purple could be beautiful colors in the springtime - you could pick a color you like at David's Bridal and a fabric, and just have your girls pick out their own dresses and their own shoes.  I guarantee you that it'll look beautiful, and matchy matchy dresses with matching shoes and accessories seems to be going out of style anyway.

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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    Thanks girls. I really appreciate it. I'm just kinda stuck on the purple. My FI and I both really like the color. Yea, I don't want to be matchy matchy. It's not us lol. I guess my biggest thing is on shoes is that well, I wanted Purple shoes. All the shoes that I find that I like are heels. And it's getting aggrivating. It's giong to be outside and I'm so afraid of my heels sinking. I might bring flats or something for the reception. Idk.
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  • calindicalindi
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    edited December 2011
    I'd honestly stick with a neutral for shoes.  It's easier to find, the girls can find something that's comfortable for them (one shoe that might be comfortable for one girl can cut into another's foot), and they're MUCH more likely to wear them again.  Plus you won't have to worry about it clashing with the dress.

    Or you could have them all wear black dresses, and tell them to pick out purple shoes of their choosing.  They'd likely come up with different shades and styles that will look pretty cool!  That's another alternative.

    If I were you, I'd do silver or gold or white or black, depending on your wedding colors.  Those are much easier colors to find in shoes.

    And I definitely think having comfy dancing shoes for the reception is totally a good idea!  My aunt took a pair of Keds (you know the white sneakers?) and bedazzled them with white sequins and bows and stuff.  It was super cute - not high-class or expensive looking, but totally perfect for her personality since we knew she hated to be in high heels for any length of time.

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  • LuluP82LuluP82
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    edited December 2011
    THe issue with flats for the reception is your dress will drag...if you're wearing heels for the ceremony, your dress will the altered for that height, and if you shrink for the reception your dress will be dragging.

    I ended up going with wedge flip flops since that way my dress was (mostly) off the floor.
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  • calindicalindi
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    edited December 2011
    Also, you can wear high heels on the grass while using these:

    http://thesolemates.com/

    I haven't used them myself, but I've been told by other brides on here that they really do work in keeping your heel from sinking in.

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  • edited December 2011
    Are you sure you mean "BDU"?  BDU is no longer authorized by the Army.  It's a version of "camo", google an image of it; it was replaced by the ACU digital pattern.  Both are combat uniforms.  The "Class A" uniform is the traditional "dress" uniform for the Army.
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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    Yes, I ment 'BDU" as in 'battle dress uniform'. I know what it was replaced with. We wanted something a bit off key. More than likely the groomsmen will be his brothers, in which are civillians. I don't believe it would be right for a Civillian to wear the actual 'now' ACU or Army Combat Uniform.  We're not doing tradition just because of that. I believe it may be a bit disrespectful for a civillian to wear the 'ACU's. So thats why we agreed on the old 'BDU's. :)
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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    lol @ calindi. At least she was comfortable! I'll have to check out the solemates. Because I want cute shoes as well as for the girls. I also think I figured out the colors. After hours of looking at color palates and playing around on davidsbridal.com I believe what I'll do for the bridesmaids (2 Bridesmaids and 1 maid of honor), They will wear black with Silver sash & shoes. My maid of honor will wear Purple w/ black sash & shoes. The flower girl (my 2 yr old daughter) a white dress with purple accents.

    It all seemed to come together. With the help of 'solemates' hopefully our walking experience will not be ruined. Unless it rains :( I'm praying that it doesn't.

    Ladies I definantly appreciate the responses. They are so helpful. To think this is only the beginning. I have a feeling I will be posting alot more later lol.

    If you have any other helpful info then please feel free to PM or post :)

    Thanks again
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  • Sammy0709Sammy0709
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    edited December 2011

    It's just as inappropriate to have a civillian where a BDU.  Just because it is out-dated doesn't mean that makes it acceptable.  FIL is a vet who wore that uniform and I am 100% positive he would be extremely offended if he knew civillians were donning it for a wedding.  Regardless of whether the uniform is current or not people earned the right to wear it and fought and died in it.  That's my opinion on that matter.

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  • iluvmytxrgriluvmytxrgr
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    edited December 2011

    Actually, the BDU is not totally out of date.  There are Army and AF units who still use it.  I broke myself earning that uniform.  I have friends and family memebers who have died in that uniform.  I find it just as tacky and offensive for you to have your civilian groomsmen wear it as I would if they were wearing ACUs. 



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  • AlouetteBeansAlouetteBeans
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: Planning troubles:
    Yes, I ment 'BDU" as in 'battle dress uniform'. I know what it was replaced with. We wanted something a bit off key. More than likely the groomsmen will be his brothers, in which are civillians. I don't believe it would be right for a Civillian to wear the actual 'now' ACU or Army Combat Uniform.  We're not doing tradition just because of that. I believe it may be a bit disrespectful for a civillian to wear the 'ACU's. So thats why we agreed on the old 'BDU's. :)
    Posted by NSizemore2011
     If you really believe that, then you wouldn't have them wear the other uniform either. I agree with the other girls who said people still use that uniform, even if they didn't,  it is still disrespecting the uniform. You're treating it like a costume when it is supposed to be an honor to wear. Just because they have updated things doesn't make the old uniform less honorable, and it shouldn't be treated with any less respect.

    Good luck planning things.  
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  • edited December 2011

    WOW.  Way to be disrespectful the people who have actually earned the right to wear that uniform.  Your FI actually agreed to this idea as well?  Nice. Undecided

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  • Beachy730Beachy730
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    edited December 2011
    Ditto all PP's about how disrespectful it is to have civilians wear that uniform for your wedding.  A wedding is not a costume party, and people shouldn't wear that uniform just to make your pictures look better.  If you want people to wear the uniform, have your FI ask other people in his command who have earned the right to wear it to be his GMs.  I truly can't believe that someone who has earned and fought to wear that uniform would be okay with people playing dress up in it for their wedding.
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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    Thats exactly what was going to originally be. The guys he had in mind are going to be deployed by the time we get married.

    What would you suggest?
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  • Beachy730Beachy730
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: Planning troubles:
    Thats exactly what was going to originally be. The guys he had in mind are going to be deployed by the time we get married. What would you suggest?
    Posted by NSizemore2011
    I suggest asking the people who are nearest and dearest to him to stand up for him, not just who will make the pictures look nice.  If that is civilian friends, then have them wear a tux or whatever matches the formality of your wedding.  But please don't disrespect anyone that has fought and died in that uniform by making it a costume.  
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  • iluvmytxrgriluvmytxrgr
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    edited December 2011
    You have them wear a tux or a suit.  Niether BDUs nor ACUs were ever regulated to be worn to weddings.  The Class B, Class A or dress uniform are better choices. 
    If you would like to acknowledge and honor the people who can not be at your wedding due to deployment, you can mention them in the program or play a song at the reception in their honor. 


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  • AlouetteBeansAlouetteBeans
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: Planning troubles:
    Thats exactly what was going to originally be. The guys he had in mind are going to be deployed by the time we get married. What would you suggest?
    Posted by NSizemore2011
    either getting someone who has the right to wear the uniform, if thats what you want represented in your WP (active duty, reservists) or have your civilian friends wear a suit or tux.

    Personally, I would rather choose my WP based on who is important to me rather than what they could wear. FWIW, DH did have some AD members as GM, but since they weren't all SMs he had them all wear tuxes, he wore his uniform, and it was still definitely a military wedding.
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  • edited December 2011
    flip flops are not cute at all. It is ok to embrace the military thing but that is way over board. The only thing you will see military is my finace is his white navy chief uniform. So your grace beyond military girl.
  • Sammy0709Sammy0709
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: Planning troubles:
    You have them wear a tux or a suit.  Niether BDUs nor ACUs were ever regulated to be worn to weddings.  The Class B, Class A or dress uniform are better choices.  If you would like to acknowledge and honor the people who can not be at your wedding due to deployment, you can mention them in the program or play a song at the reception in their honor. 
    Posted by iluvmytxrgr
    This.
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  • kyrgyzstankyrgyzstan
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    edited December 2011
    You can be offbeat and different all you want, but your FI wears that uniform, and he better do it in accordance with regulations. If he wants to be offbeat too, than he needs to wear civilian attire.

    http://www.tacticalgearcommand.com/acu/regulations.html

    This is for the ACUs, but it applies here as well.



    THE ACU IS NOT NORMALLY CONSIDERED APPROPRIATE FOR SOCIAL OR OFFICIAL FUNCTIONS OFF THE INSTALLATION, SUCH AS MEMORIAL SERVICES, FUNERALS, WEDDINGS, INAUGURALS, PATRIOTIC CEREMONIES, ETC. THE ACU IS ISSUED AS A COMBAT UNIFORM AND IS NOT INTENDED FOR WEAR AS AN ALL-PURPOSE UNIFORM WHEN OTHER UNIFORMS (CLASS A OR B, DRESS, AND MESS UNIFORM) ARE MORE APPROPRIATE.



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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    Okay thanks girls.  :)
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  • calindicalindi
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    edited December 2011
    It's also perfectly fine to have some members of the wedding party in uniform (when they've earned the right to wear that uniform) and some in civilian attire.  It would be far more strange (and offensive) for civilians to wear uniforms than to have bridal party members in different outfits.

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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    Okay so I think I might have come up with an alternate route.

    Tell me what you think you guys please........

    Put them in suite like attire....

    But i found vests and ties with a camo print.
    not the exact pattern of the BDUs but similar.
    They're hand made. I only wanted the camo bc of the colors. I hope this would be a good alternate.....if not I'll have to rethink it.

    Thanks
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  • Beachy730Beachy730
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    edited December 2011
    If you want them in camo ties that's fine.  Personally, I don't think camo works with ties so I wouldn't do it, but there is a reg on E whose H and WP wore camo vests because he is a big hunter and it suited their personal style so it was cute.  

    Another option, which is probably what i would do if I wanted the colors, would be to find solid ties in the 2 colors you really want (green and brown?) and have the GMs alternate colors.
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  • calindicalindi
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: Planning troubles:
    Okay so I think I might have come up with an alternate route. Tell me what you think you guys please........ Put them in suite like attire.... But i found vests and ties with a camo print. not the exact pattern of the BDUs but similar. They're hand made. I only wanted the camo bc of the colors. I hope this would be a good alternate.....if not I'll have to rethink it. Thanks
    Posted by NSizemore2011
    That's not an offensive thing at all.  I personally wouldn't choose to do that as it's not at all my style, but if it's what you want to do, it shouldn't offend anyone or be disrespectful at all, so feel free to do this.

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  • NSizemore2011NSizemore2011
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    edited December 2011
    well we're kind of out doorsy people anyways.
    He's big into hunting and all the things that a country boy enjoys.

    I like camo pattern myself personally. When I found then I was so excited!

    Just wanted to see what you guys thought :)

    thanx
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