Military Brides

Marriage before basic?

Ok so SO is in th process of joining the Army. We have been together for 5 years, we have a 4 month old daughter, and we have been living together for a little over a year now. SO originally asked me to marry him before we even found out I was pregnant and I know to get most of the benefits you have to be married. We've been together for so long, it would be kind of hard to not be able to live together, especially with a baby.

I don't know I'm just not sure and then my mom is always telling me how she doesn't believe in couples getting married at a young age (I'm 19 and he is 21 btw) and I'm afraid she'll be disappointed, again. I didn't even tell her he asked me to marry him or that he got me a ring because I was so scared.

Re: Marriage before basic?

  • Beachy730Beachy730
    5000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    In Response to Marriage before basic?:
    Ok so SO is in th process of joining the Army. We have been together for 5 years, we have a 4 month old daughter, and we have been living together for a little over a year now. SO originally asked me to marry him before we even found out I was pregnant and I know to get most of the benefits you have to be married. We've been together for so long, it would be kind of hard to not be able to live together, especially with a baby. I don't know I'm just not sure and then my mom is always telling me how she doesn't believe in couples getting married at a young age (I'm 19 and he is 21 btw) and I'm afraid she'll be disappointed, again. I didn't even tell her he asked me to marry him or that he got me a ring because I was so scared.
    Posted by jazmynalex
    Don't get married until after he has completed basic training, and gone through a deployment.  Stay at home near your mom for help with the baby if you need it.  But no matter how long you've been together or how great your relationship is right now, there is no telling what the military life could do to that.  Get some experience with it before rushing into the marriage just because he is leaving.

    Now, that advice is for anyone, regardless of age.  Now, as for your age, definitely wait to get married.  Read the thread a few down from this about the girl wanting to get married a year after high school.  All that advice is valid for you as well.  You are way too young, and you both have a lot of devleoping and maturing to do before you should enter into marriage.
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  • kara811kara811
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary
    member
    edited December 2011
    I agree with everything dnbeach said. Also the post right before this asks about being married young, so you should check that out as well.

    You shouldn't get married after basic training. Everything will be different once your SO is in the military,and you should experience that. Being away from your SO and going through deployments can be difficult, so it's good to know how everything is before you actually get married. Your baby will still be covered by benefits, and live close to your family. Good Luck. 
  • edited December 2011
    i agree with dnbeach. I mean, I'm young and getting married. I'll be 19 when I get married. Me and SO are waiting until after he is done with his basic training and tech school. You should too especially with the baby. It gives you time to spend with your mom and help with the baby. If your relationship can get through the distance and you both love eachother just as much, if not more, you shouldnt have much to worry about!... besides telling your mom or course
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  • edited December 2011
    Thank you everyone! :)
  • edited December 2011
    Def try to get with base legal after he goes thru basic to get your bambino covered. That'll be nice with all the baby shots and stuff.
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