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Friday Confessional

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Re: Friday Confessional

  • In Response to Re:Friday Confessional:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional:Becunning im in! If only someone could give us all the right answers. Elle I haven't yet. Im scared. I don't know what to say or where to start. Princess I've told him that he really hurts my feelings and I don't deserve to be treated that way. He says sorry, but I don't feel its sincere. One day he can say sorry and the next day he can be mean all over again. I feel myself slipping away emotionally more and more each time there's a fight. I know people will suggest counseling, but I need to figure out first what I even want.Posted by melmac86That sounds like hes just trying to shake you off, and doesnt want to put in the effort to watch himself and change his behavior. Its really sad that hes treating you this way, and I can understand why you would be slipping away; I would too if the person who is supposed to be my best friend were repeatedly being mean to me.What drew you to him in the first place? What has changed about him?nbsp; Posted by PrincessTinyFeet[/QUOTE]

    I completely agree that he just says what he thinks I want to hear. I've seen no effort on his part to change these negative things. I can't say exactly what drew me to him in the first place. We talked through facebook for a while before our first date. Conversations came really easily. As far as what's changed I feel its a lot of stuff. For starters, I feel like he's really let himself go. Im pretty sure brushing his teeth is not high on his priority list. His teeth are so stained it grosses me out. I have to tell him at 26 to cut his toenails, because it'll be like months in between. I feel like he's lost his zest for life. I want someone who I can wake up with and be spontaneous like if I suggest a festival or new hiking trail, I don't wanna feel like I just asked him to commit a horrendous crime with me. We have no common interests. Not music, movies, an idea of a fun day, etc... I went into it wrongly thinking that someone else will make me happy; I need to find my own happiness, but you still need to be with someone who brings out the best in you. The problem is, our lease isn't up til next May and I want to stay in our apartment and he isn't going to be the one to leave, because he's so unmotivated.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:ded94e29-7148-44a3-a456-2caaebe4a7c7">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional: I completely agree that he just says what he thinks I want to hear. I've seen no effort on his part to change these negative things. I can't say exactly what drew me to him in the first place. We talked through facebook for a while before our first date. Conversations came really easily. As far as what's changed I feel its a lot of stuff. For starters, I feel like he's really let himself go. Im pretty sure brushing his teeth is not high on his priority list. His teeth are so stained it grosses me out. I have to tell him at 26 to cut his toenails, because it'll be like months in between. I feel like he's lost his zest for life. I want someone who I can wake up with and be spontaneous like if I suggest a festival or new hiking trail, I don't wanna feel like I just asked him to commit a horrendous crime with me. We have no common interests. Not music, movies, an idea of a fun day, etc... I went into it wrongly thinking that someone else will make me happy; I need to find my own happiness, but you still need to be with someone who brings out the best in you. The problem is, our lease isn't up til next May and I want to stay in our apartment and he isn't going to be the one to leave, because he's so unmotivated.
    Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

    10 months is a long time to endure grody teeth, toe nails, and apathy about life just for an apartment. Just saying.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:503518d5-e1e7-4361-ae70-fa66a7326dec">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional : I would officially like to apply to be a member of this club. I confess that I am 50/50 on whether to stay with BF.  I also confess that I sway one way or another depending on whether I am with him or alone.  I hate my life right now and wish I could just make a chioce and be sure it was the right one.
    Posted by doubleSS07[/QUOTE]

    *Hugs*

    All I can say is don't pressure yourself to make a decision.  It will become clear in time; don't force it.
  • In other news, I confess that I wouldn't feel the slightest spasm of sadness if my boss were to die in a fiery car crash.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:ded94e29-7148-44a3-a456-2caaebe4a7c7">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional: I completely agree that he just says what he thinks I want to hear. I've seen no effort on his part to change these negative things. I can't say exactly what drew me to him in the first place. We talked through facebook for a while before our first date. Conversations came really easily. As far as what's changed I feel its a lot of stuff. For starters, I feel like he's really let himself go. Im pretty sure brushing his teeth is not high on his priority list. His teeth are so stained it grosses me out. I have to tell him at 26 to cut his toenails, because it'll be like months in between. I feel like he's lost his zest for life. I want someone who I can wake up with and be spontaneous like if I suggest a festival or new hiking trail, I don't wanna feel like I just asked him to commit a horrendous crime with me. We have no common interests. Not music, movies, an idea of a fun day, etc... I went into it wrongly thinking that someone else will make me happy; I need to find my own happiness, but you still need to be with someone who brings out the best in you. The problem is, our lease isn't up til next May and I want to stay in our apartment and he isn't going to be the one to leave, because he's so unmotivated.
    Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

    <div>At 26, I completely agree that he should know to brush his teeth and clip his nails. You deserve a boyfriend, not a child. If you two have been dating over 5 years (based on your ticker) and hes 26, It sounds like you guys have really grown apart. Perhaps it was the zest of a new relationship that was keeping you together and supplementing the lack of common interests in the beginning, but now at 5 years together those common interests are going to be what carries the relationship in the long run.</div><div>
    </div><div>This is just me, but I think a good relationship is when you can enjoy common interests with a person, and still feel comfortable enough to discuss and gush about the interests that arent common. He doesnt sound like he even wants to make the effort to embrace your interests for the good of the relationship. And youre right, you should be able to be happy by yourself, and finding someone who compliments your personality makes it even better.</div><div>
    </div><div>As for the lease problem, that does sound like a pickle...do you have a seperate room that maybe you could make into your own and live as roommates until may? If it gets bad enough, would you consider leaving and finding a better apartment more suited to you?</div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:c6ba102f-a8b7-4c2a-b6cd-e36cb42c761d">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]I confess that I have serious baby fever and want to get KTFU yesterday. We're waiting for a year or so, and definitely until I have a full time job. It sucks, and I want to start trying nowwww. I also confess that I'm missing my old last name. I felt like it was a pretty important part of my identity, especially since it was my mom's maiden name and not the last name I was born with. Even though I'm excited about having H's name, I'm kind of sad.
    Posted by buggle2[/QUOTE]

    Squeee bugglebaby!  You're waiting a whole year?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:8aa977cd-57cd-401e-ab0b-fd3646926b19">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional : *Hugs* All I can say is don't pressure yourself to make a decision.  It will become clear in time; don't force it.
    Posted by Elle1036[/QUOTE]

    Thanks for reminding me.  I am feeling pressured to make a choice.  Mostly by myself but from others in my life that know what happened.  I feel like I'll sorta be outcasted if I choose to forgive and stay.  I've been staying at his siters house this week while they are out of town.  It's been hard..harder than I thought being back on my own.  I hate him for ruining everything.  I hate myself for wanting to stay.


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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:0a98345e-de9f-4f77-9863-f520ce377020">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Friday Confessional : Amazon prime is your friend.
    Posted by dewingedpixie[/QUOTE]

    :) My plan is go to the mall and not leave until everyone has a gift.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:4bd15841-43ec-477b-aded-e665c9393ee5">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional : Thanks for reminding me.  I am feeling pressured to make a choice.  Mostly by myself but from others in my life that know what happened.  I feel like I'll sorta be outcasted if I choose to forgive and stay.  I've been staying at his siters house this week while they are out of town.  It's been hard..harder than I thought being back on my own.  I hate him for ruining everything.  I hate myself for wanting to stay.
    Posted by doubleSS07[/QUOTE]

    Make the decision that's right for you in the time frame that's right for you. <3  I recommend this book to many people, but I really like it:  Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay. C<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Good-Leave-Stay-Step---Step/dp/0452275350/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1343408265&sr=8-1&keywords=too+good+to+leave+too+bad+to+stay" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">licky.</a>
  • Confession: I have no idea what I'm doing right now. I love my grad program but I have a lot of doubts about if this was really the right path. I really want to teach but not getting the TA job has made me wonder if that will ever happen...

    Confession:
    Several people have told me that they think I didn't get the TA job because I look really young. I think that sucks especially because the guy who got it over me is an ass who has made it clear he isn't going to put that much effort into it. I'm a little bitter about the whole thing.

    Confession:
    I'm afraid that even if I lose the weight that I want to I still won't be happy with how I look because I have major body image issues.


  • I confess that I think I need to see a therapist. I am afraid that these really low, depressive feelings are not temporary sadness, and I don't know what to do about it. And I'm scared.

    I confess that I honestly believe that I will always make men disappear. I've been doing it since before I was born... my own biological father didn't want me.

    I confess that I don't really want to confess any of this, and I want to keep up appearances with a smile & a dismissal, but I can't keep doing it for much longer.

    I confess that some of my best friends in LIFE are right here, and I wouldn't change that for the world.



    *******************************************************************************************




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  • I confess that H and I haven't had sex since I was in the ER when everything started and I feel like the biggest piece of crap wife.  He said he completely understands and I have no reason to feel bad, but bleh.

    I confess that I'm feeling really bitter toward BIL even though I really have no reason to.  He graduated college last year, got an amazing job almost right away, worked for a year, and is now moving to India "until he runs out of money."  It doesn't affect my life in any way, but it just irritates me.
    Anniversary
  • <div>Elle - I <3 learning. I'm starting a certificate program in Supply Chain Management in September. Mostly because it's free through work, but also because I just love learning new things. Kudos to you for going back!</div><div>
    </div><div>Lyn - I wish we lived closer... I KNOW we'd be BFFs. </div><div>
    </div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:c6ba102f-a8b7-4c2a-b6cd-e36cb42c761d">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>I confess that I have serious baby fever and want to get KTFU yesterday</strong>. We're waiting for a year or so, and definitely until I have a full time job. It sucks, and I want to start trying nowwww.<strong> I also confess that I'm missing my old last name.</strong> I felt like it was a pretty important part of my identity, especially since it was my mom's maiden name and not the last name I was born with. Even though I'm excited about having H's name, I'm kind of sad.
    Posted by buggle2[/QUOTE]

    <div>This. It's not happening yet, but I'll be so ready for when it does.</div><div>
    </div><div>I don't necessarily miss my last name, but I don't like that my new name still feels weird to me. I constantly have to introduce myself at events, and it hasn't gotten any easier. I still feel like I'm lying. </div><div>
    </div><div>I confess that I absolutely love being married to my DH. I feel like we are just so damn good for each other, and even after 4+ years of being together, I always look forward to spending time with him.</div>
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    "You are made of win." -SopChick
    Still here and still fabulous!

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:76c7a530-597a-4b18-9c67-cb95787a6b40">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]I confess that I think I need to see a therapist. I am afraid that these really low, depressive feelings are not temporary sadness, and I don't know what to do about it. And I'm scared. I confess that I honestly believe that I will always make men disappear. I've been doing it since before I was born... my own biological father didn't want me. I confess that I don't really want to confess any of this, and I want to keep up appearances with a smile & a dismissal, but I can't keep doing it for much longer. I confess that some of my best friends in LIFE are right here, and I wouldn't change that for the world.
    Posted by BriSox81[/QUOTE]

    <div>I <3 you. Get thee to a therapist stat. Everything you're feeling is normal, but you shouldn't HAVE to feel that way. A counselor can give you some exercises to change your line of thinking, and you may benefit from some anti-depressants. </div><div>
    </div><div>PS Your bio dad leaving didn't have an effing thing to do with you. His loss, for sure.</div>
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    "You are made of win." -SopChick
    Still here and still fabulous!

  • I confess that FI and I have had sex once in the past month, because I've been feeling so fat. 

    I confess that I'm letting my parents actions/emotions hurt my feelings. I try really hard to just accept them as they are, love them for who they are but not 'take it personally' when they let me down. Recently its been difficult.

    I confess that I'm feeling guilty for wanting a nice wedding. I feel like after 9 years there are many people who don't see the point in having a big fancy wedding and think we should just go to a JOP. This makes me feel like I am being an entitled b!tch who doesn't deserve to have a 'big day'.

    I confess I'm dreading going wedding dress shopping because I hate the way I look, but I can't even find the motivation to go do ANYTHING...which makes me feel even worse.



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  • I confess I ate Sour Cream & Onion chips for breakfast today.

    I confess that I skipped the gym today and yesterday...and the only reason I care is because I don't want to let me trainer down.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:fb28a07f-6c46-4079-9e75-5b067fed1cbc">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]I confess that FI and I have had sex once in the past month, because I've been feeling so fat.  I confess that I'm letting my parents actions/emotions hurt my feelings. I try really hard to just accept them as they are, love them for who they are but not 'take it personally' when they let me down.<strong> Recently its been difficult. I confess that I'm feeling guilty for wanting a nice wedding. I feel like after 9 years there are many people who don't see the point in having a big fancy wedding and think we should just go to a JOP. This makes me feel like I am being an entitled b!tch who doesn't deserve to have a 'big day'.</strong> I confess I'm dreading going wedding dress shopping because I hate the way I look, but I can't even find the motivation to go do ANYTHING...which makes me feel even worse.
    Posted by lennonkdc[/QUOTE]

    Screw those people. I say after 9 years you totally deserve to throw a kick-ass party to celebrate.


  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:76c7a530-597a-4b18-9c67-cb95787a6b40">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]I confess that I think I need to see a therapist. I am afraid that these really low, depressive feelings are not temporary sadness, and I don't know what to do about it. And I'm scared. I confess that I honestly believe that I will always make men disappear. I've been doing it since before I was born... my own biological father didn't want me. I confess that I don't really want to confess any of this, and I want to keep up appearances with a smile & a dismissal, but I can't keep doing it for much longer. I confess that some of my best friends in LIFE are right here, and I wouldn't change that for the world.
    Posted by BriSox81[/QUOTE]

    I confess that I kind of have a girlcrush on you and the men in your life are crazy because I would never leave you.
  • In Response to Re:Friday Confessional:[QUOTE]Confession: I have no idea what I'm doing right now. I love my grad program but I have a lot of doubts about if this was really the right path. I really want to teach but not getting the TA job has made me wonder if that will ever happen...Confession: Several people have told me that they think I didn't get the TA job because I look really young. I think that sucks especially because the guy who got it over me is an ass who has made it clear he isn't going to put that much effort into it. I'm a little bitter about the whole thing.Confession: I'm afraid that even if I lose the weight that I want to I still won't be happy with how I look because I have major body image issues. Posted by bethsmiles[/QUOTE]

    Sorry for the text, I'm on mobile.
    Beth, you are awesome and they just fear your awesomeness. I'm sorry you didn't get the job, but Im sure you'll find something equally as good.

    Body issues are tough, I often wonder if I'll be happy with myself after weight loss as well. Perhaps you could not focus so much on losing weight, as getting healthy and loving yourself? That way you'll get to wherever you are healthiest, and hopefully be happy with yourself wherever it may be
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:4e574000-7266-4c20-920a-3f66719f8ce8">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Friday Confessional : PS Your bio dad leaving didn't have an effing thing to do with you. His loss, for sure.
    Posted by cu97tiger[/QUOTE]

    This.

    And hugs. Do find someone to talk to. You are awesome and lovely and wonderful. I hope you can find the place where you can see all the wonderful things that everyone else sees.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:e0d944c9-024b-4de7-826a-11e0e87f0687">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional: Sorry for the text, I'm on mobile. Beth, you are awesome and they just fear your awesomeness. I'm sorry you didn't get the job, but Im sure you'll find something equally as good. Body issues are tough, I often wonder if I'll be happy with myself after weight loss as well. Perhaps you could not focus so much on losing weight, as getting healthy and loving yourself? That way you'll get to wherever you are healthiest, and hopefully be happy with yourself wherever it may be
    Posted by PrincessTinyFeet[/QUOTE]

    Aww...thanks. I'm hoping to get a research assistant job but I'm worried that even if I do get it 1) it won't really pay enough for me to get by and 2) it won't be any sort of stepping stone toward my dream job of teaching.

    I was doing really with focusing on getting healthy for awhile. But now I can't seem to get under 160 and I feel like my goals have become impossible. I would anything to get into the 150s and not immediately creep back up into the 160s.

    <span style="font-weight:bold;">Confession</span>: I just thought of another one. I worry way to much about the future. I'll start worrying about finding a job, then I'll worry about BF finding a job after he graduates, then I worry about him getting into his top choice grad. school, and then it spirals out of control from there. But I'm also so excited to get engaged and marry him that I've decided I don't care about any of those worries in regards to us changing the timeline we've discussed.


  • melmac86melmac86 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited July 2012
    becunning and princess - I totally hear you. We do have a 2 bedroom place, so a roommate situation would work in terms of space. I've never navigated something like that before, though and I feel like it would be really tricky. I'd rather just move if it comes down to that...the only problem is that I have zero money saved for anything. I would need a few months to figure things out financially and save for a security deposit.
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  • I confess that I am sick of working on my PhD and just want to be done. I don't care about it anymore.

    I confess that I am not passionate about my work and that the thought of working in a field I'm not passionate about for the next 30+ years makes me sick to my stomach. 

    I confess that I would love to travel the world perpetually with H.
    image
    Married! :) 5/19/12 The Domesticals

  • In Response to Re:Friday Confessional:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional:In Response to Re:Friday Confessional: Sorry for the text, I'm on mobile. Beth, you are awesome and they just fear your awesomeness. I'm sorry you didn't get the job, but Im sure you'll find something equally as good. Body issues are tough, I often wonder if I'll be happy with myself after weight loss as well. Perhaps you could not focus so much on losing weight, as getting healthy and loving yourself? That way you'll get to wherever you are healthiest, and hopefully be happy with yourself wherever it may bePosted by PrincessTinyFeetAww...thanks. I'm hoping to get a research assistant job but I'm worried that even if I do get it 1 it won't really pay enough for me to get by and 2 it won't be any sort of stepping stone toward my dream job of teaching.I was doing really with focusing on getting healthy for awhile. But now I can't seem to get under 160 and I feel like my goals have become impossible. I would anything to get into the 150s and not immediately creep back up into the 160s.Confession: I just thought of another one. I worry way to much about the future. I'll start worrying about finding a job, then I'll worry about BF finding a job after he graduates, then I worry about him getting into his top choice grad. school, and then it spirals out of control from there. But I'm also so excited to get engaged and marry him that I've decided I don't care about any of those worries in regards to us changing the timeline we've discussed. Posted by bethsmiles[/QUOTE]

    Perhaps look into the annual pay of the average research assistant? I know how you feel about the goal aspect though. I sometimes worry that being a vet tech is like being second best to the vet, and I worry that I'll feel like I didn't try hard enough for a higher goal.

    As for the plateau in weight, that's really lame. It can be hard to get past it, maybe you just need to switch up your workout routine? Try something thats always been hard for you, maybe it'll jump start your metabolism!

    I'm so happy that you love YBF, and can find peace knowing that even if the future is unclear, you'll be happy with him by your side. That's an awesome way to look at it. :
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:92f41032-4280-4196-9797-1bdefdebd3d8">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Friday Confessional : Screw those people. I say after 9 years you totally deserve to throw a kick-ass party to celebrate.
    Posted by bethsmiles[/QUOTE]

    <div>Thanks Beth! Most people are truely looking forward to the party, but there are some people who are side eyeing us hard. I know its more their issue then ours, but it still hurts and make me feel like I'm being silly.</div>



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  • I confess that the confessions from the grad students have pretty much validated every single time I thought I was doing the right thing by not getting a PhD.  I do sort of miss my old job (cancer research lab), but I'm starting to hate this one.  I have 4 years experience and an undergrad could do my job.  I know it's time to start looking for a new one in my new field so I can get some decent experience because I finish my MPH, but I have spent so much time job searching in the past 4 years that I can't motivate myself to do it again.

    I confess that I'm not into wedding planning at all, and this doesn't really surprise me.  A two year engagement was a terrible idea, even though it was completely necessary.  

    I confess that I am in a weird, grump mood today.  I don't know why - maybe because I still haven't eaten lunch yet and my breakfast sucked because the banana I tried to eat was way too ripe.  
  • In Response to Re:Friday Confessional:[QUOTE]becunning and princess I totally hear you. We do have a 2 bedroom place, so a roommate situation would work in terms of space. I've never navigated something like that before, though and I feel like it would be really tricky. I'd rather just move if it comes down to that...the only problem is that I have zero money saved for anything. I would need a few months to figure things out financially and save for a security deposit. Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]
    Maybe begin saving your money, so of it comes to it, you can leave, but work on the relationship in the meantime? Perhaps set a timeline for yourself. If you are actively working on saving the relationship, and he hasn't done anything different by the time you have enough saved, maybe you'll have your answer. And if he does change, hopefully you'll find happiness with him.
    Good luck, I really hope you can figure it out. Remember, you're awesome an you deserve happiness!
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:76c7a530-597a-4b18-9c67-cb95787a6b40">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]I confess that I think I need to see a therapist. I am afraid that these really low, depressive feelings are not temporary sadness, and I don't know what to do about it. And I'm scared. I confess that I honestly believe that I will always make men disappear. I've been doing it since before I was born... my own biological father didn't want me. I confess that I don't really want to confess any of this, and I want to keep up appearances with a smile & a dismissal, but I can't keep doing it for much longer. I confess that some of my best friends in LIFE are right here, and I wouldn't change that for the world.
    Posted by BriSox81[/QUOTE]

    Bri please don't feel that way.  You are an awesome lady!  Go talk to someone, it helps.  Also I'm reading this book my new shrink suggested called Getting Love Right by Terrance Gorski.  So far it's been pretty darn enlightening regarding the types of relationships I have been in in the past and how I act in them.  His background is with people with chemical dependancy issues which is probably why this makes sense for me since my mom is a raging alcoholic.  Basically he says if you come from a dysfunctional family that you are a "survivor" and tend to deal with relationships based on what you were <strong>not</strong> taught by your parents.  I'm also going to check out the book that cunning recommended.  

    Also you are NOT the reason your bio dad isn't in your life, HE is the reason.  Abandoment issues are no bueno but you can work on them and be a stronger person for it.  Please don't blame yourself.  We are all pretty effed up in some way so come join our club :)  HUGS!  


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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:88baf5bb-4fee-488e-9c49-335d91bd2c32">Re:Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Friday Confessional: Maybe begin saving your money, so of it comes to it, you can leave, but work on the relationship in the meantime? Perhaps set a timeline for yourself. If you are actively working on saving the relationship, and he hasn't done anything different by the time you have enough saved, maybe you'll have your answer. And if he does change, hopefully you'll find happiness with him. Good luck, I really hope you can figure it out. Remember, you're awesome an you deserve happiness!
    Posted by PrincessTinyFeet[/QUOTE]

    This is a good idea. Thank you!!
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friday-confessional?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:836ce47f-59c3-4288-9f33-aa1ed40321e1Post:9d09e96f-ecb5-4df5-b6e4-bf31c484f081">Re: Friday Confessional</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Friday Confessional : :) My plan is go to the mall and not leave until everyone has a gift.
    Posted by jenjenniferf[/QUOTE]

    The mall makes me twitch I avoid it like the plague.
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