Save The Dates - With TWO receptions....

lparker1023

Hi!!!!

My fiance and I are from two different states and we feel it's only right to have two receptions.  Our wedding is in one state at the end of July with another reception in his hometown a week later.  Of course everyone is invited to both .... even though it is halfway across the country.  We do already have a few that will be attending both.  Anyway, any suggestions on how to word the save the dates??  I want people to know of both dates.   Thank you SO much for any help you can give!  

duckie1905

It is silly to have two receptions and even more ridiculous to invite everyone to both.  Have one in one location.  Those that can't/won't travel simply won't attend.  You can try a halfway location to cut down on some travel but it is an incredible waste of time and money to try to include everyone.

There is no need to plan your wedding to ensure that EVERYONE can attend.  Figure out who your VIPs are and make sure they can attend.

I don't have any suggestions for save the dates.  I would decline both invites because two receptions with the same guestlist would look incredibly gift-grabby and AWish to me.  There is no need for it.

megk8oz

Ditto the PPs, 2 receptions seems incredibly excessive and expensive. Have one. People can either attend your wedding or they can't.

But your wedding is not a rock band, it shouldn't go on tour.

lparker1023

Haha, I LOVE all your responses!!  Thank you so much.  I should have clarified that it is my Finaces family that wants to have a second reception in their state.  They want to pay for it.  We just want to have a party out there.... who wants to plan TWO weddings!   Maybe I should just send this thread to her?    Haha, probably not a good idea.   Thanks again!

lparker1023

Whoops.... I meant fiance not finances.  Finances are what comes AFTER I get the fiance!  

trix1223

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_save-dates-two-receptions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:079c913a-ffe1-4703-80ee-364f69c0b594Post:c4c4f65e-167e-4e80-91a8-60204540bc1d">Re: Save The Dates - With TWO receptions....</a>:
[QUOTE]Haha, I LOVE all your responses!!  Thank you so much.  I should have clarified that it is my Finaces family that wants to have a second reception in their state.  They want to pay for it.  We just want to have a party out there.... who wants to plan TWO weddings!   Maybe I should just send this thread to her?  ;)  Haha, probably not a good idea.   Thanks again!
Posted by lparker1023[/QUOTE]

You're allowed to decline you know.

duckie1905

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_save-dates-two-receptions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:079c913a-ffe1-4703-80ee-364f69c0b594Post:c4c4f65e-167e-4e80-91a8-60204540bc1d">Re: Save The Dates - With TWO receptions....</a>:
[QUOTE]Haha, I LOVE all your responses!!  Thank you so much.  I should have clarified that it is my Finaces family that wants to have a second reception in their state.  They want to pay for it.  We just want to have a party out there.... who wants to plan TWO weddings!   Maybe I should just send this thread to her?  ;)  Haha, probably not a good idea.   Thanks again!
Posted by lparker1023[/QUOTE]

It doesn't matter who is planning and paying for it.  You and your FI will be the ones that look bad because it will appear to all your guests that you are throwing two weddings.

It is okay to decline, especially when you have such a huge chance of coming off like an AW.

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I'm from one state, my fiance is from another, we live in yet a third, and I think having more than one reception is ridiculous. Invite everyone to your wedding and leave it at that. You can decline the second party.

That said, if you must do this - invite everyone to the actual wedding. See who can't come and if it ends up being a TON of people, take up your IL's offer and have a BBQ or something.