so my MOH and my mom have decided not to have a bridal shower for me, but just a cookout for my fiance and I to celebrate the fact that we are getting married. We have been engaged for over a year, and this cookout seems more like an engagement party to me. They said they decided on the cookout so we could invite people that aren't invited to the wedding. Isn't that tacky? "Hey come to my cookout, but you aren't invited to the wedding...". Other issues I have: the cookout is a month before my wedding so there will only be like 15 people who can make it. Most wedding attendies are not local and it is a lot to ask people to travel to CT then NH within a month. That brings me to my biggest issue: I have to travel to Connecticut for it. I am probably being a bridezilla, but if this is for us shouldn't they come to NH? I know I should be grateful that they are planning something, but I just don't feel like it is a good idea. Should I tell my that I appreciate the effort, but not to have it? I have to decide this weekend, because they want to send out the evites...they aren't even sending out real paper invitations...
What should I do????