Snarky Brides

mama drama

So I just got engaged a couple weeks ago and my mother is freaking out. I don't mind her being excited but she is already buying things. I don't even have the reception venue yet. She keeps asking me ?s about the wedding and I tell her I haven't thought about it. I told her I was THINKING about purple for one of my colors, so she goes out and buys thank you cards (seriously the LAST thing you worry about!) and a rehearsal dress for my niece (FG) because it's purple.
She is a very diy and crafty lady so she goes to all kinds of stores and buys stuff without even consulting with me. I confronted her about it and how I want her to be a part of everything but I want to be the one that makes the decisions- (I am paying for 95% of everything, she will help a little) it is MY wedding right? She got all sad and defensive and said "well I don't know why I even try to help then."
After a few days of sulking she said she was sorry and if there was anything that she bought that I didn't like I need to tell her and she would either return it or sell it. I appreciate her apology and helpfulness but she just doesn't get it! I want to be there and pick the stuff out, whether she is with me or not. I plan on this being my only wedding so I want it the way I want it, not her way.
What can I say to her that doesn't upset her but makes her understand? Or am I just being a brat?
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