Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed

ricksang

Okay we think one of my sister's friends is collecting money and other donations for my mom and sister and then keeping the donations for herself. I want to confront her and so does my sister but my mom says we can't because we don't have solid proof. I want to beat the b!tch with the butt of my gun to be honest but of course I won't. Who profits from other people's suffering?

So can I put a FB status on the Columbian Progress where this girl is collecting donations and say something to the effect of

"If you have donated money or other items to anyone other than (My mom's Name), My mom's bank's name, or Me and feel that your donations were improperly managed or used for something other than the hurricane fund,  please message me through my facebook page, my mom's bank, or my mom's phone number so that we can take the proper leagal action.


OR WHAT SHOULD I DO??

ewhiteman06

That is so incredibly skeezy I'm sorry I'm not really sure what you should do from a legal standpoint. 

ricksang

I know E.

ewhiteman06

What information do you have that she's collecting money? Have you confronted her about it? (I'm not doubting you, just gathering information)

NicoleSahara

Could you give a friend that you trust a small amount of money and tell them to donate it? You should then be able to tell if your sis' friend kept it or not, right?

ewhiteman06

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-advice-preferably-law-but-whoever-am-pissed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d3a01a30-7b58-4e04-8a4f-7d32c6a364a1Post:df74449f-6e34-45cf-962d-327ebd66fa00">Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed</a>:
[QUOTE]Could you give a friend that you trust a small amount of money and tell them to donate it? You should then be able to tell if your sis' friend kept it or not, right?
Posted by NicoleSahara[/QUOTE]

<div>Very smart.</div>

ricksang

Not a lot of information. My mom told me that people have been telling my sister they have givwn donations to this girl and she says no one has given her anything. That's a little hard to beileve seeing that everyone other person/place that is taking donations for my mom have recieved something. I haven't confronted her b/c I am two hours away.

ricksang

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-advice-preferably-law-but-whoever-am-pissed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d3a01a30-7b58-4e04-8a4f-7d32c6a364a1Post:df74449f-6e34-45cf-962d-327ebd66fa00">Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed</a>:
[QUOTE]Could you give a friend that you trust a small amount of money and tell them to donate it? You should then be able to tell if your sis' friend kept it or not, right?
Posted by NicoleSahara[/QUOTE]
Whoa, that's a very good idea.

cheeseandrice

I like Nicole's idea... want me to send like $10-$20? Is she pretending to collect money on their behalf or what?  skeezy for sure. 

NicoleSahara

I just think if you posted on FB or something public like that, it might get back to the girl and she could cover her ass. But if you just let one person know what's up, you could catch her and then there's two of you who could vouch for that. What a terrible person btw, I hope you bust her.

ewhiteman06

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-advice-preferably-law-but-whoever-am-pissed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d3a01a30-7b58-4e04-8a4f-7d32c6a364a1Post:30a43ec5-6555-441b-8374-4c8f5d896a20">Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed</a>:
[QUOTE]Not a lot of information. My mom told me that people have been telling my sister they have givwn donations to this girl and she says no one has given her anything. That's a little hard to beileve seeing that everyone other person/place that is taking donations for my mom have recieved something. I haven't confronted her b/c I am two hours away.
Posted by ricksang[/QUOTE]

<div>If she's a friend of your sister's, maybe your sister should call and just say "hey I heard you've been collecting money on behalf of myself and my mom and I wanted to say thank you. There are others who are doing so as well and what's worked best for that is they make a weekly deposit in XXX bank account so no money is misplaced. I wanted to give you that information and say thank you."</div><div>
</div><div>ETA: Kill her with kindness. Instead of bashing her on FB and having no recourse, maybe give her the benefit of the doubt and guilt her into doing the right thing.</div>

ricksang

Aww Steph nahh, I am going to get my SIL to do it since she lives close to there.

Nicole you make very good points. I am going to go with your idea.

chelseamb11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-advice-preferably-law-but-whoever-am-pissed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:d3a01a30-7b58-4e04-8a4f-7d32c6a364a1Post:df74449f-6e34-45cf-962d-327ebd66fa00">Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed</a>:
[QUOTE]Could you give a friend that you trust a small amount of money and tell them to donate it? You should then be able to tell if your sis' friend kept it or not, right?
Posted by NicoleSahara[/QUOTE]

This is a good idea. 
Do you have any idea who possibly could have paid her and it didn't get to you?  If so, maybe contact them and ask them if they gave her money?

ricksang

Should I get receipt from her for proof or something?

ricksang

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-advice-preferably-law-but-whoever-am-pissed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d3a01a30-7b58-4e04-8a4f-7d32c6a364a1Post:1aa06271-ecbe-48b5-ac2e-86d5c0cd06f6">Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed : This is a good idea.  Do you have any idea who possibly could have paid her and it didn't get to you?  If so, maybe contact them and ask them if they gave her money?
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]
No. I don't. It's all people who live in my mom's town. :(

chelseamb11

Have any of these people paid with checks?  I'd contact them and see if the have. Then the money trail shows that they wrote her a check and she never wrote you one in return.

NicoleSahara

I would have your SIL ask about getting a receipt from the girl, see if she'd give her one. That would be helpful.

Ash2985

You could maybe have your SIL ask for a receipt for proof of donation for tax deduction purposes, I would think.

LeenieLane

I think I get the jist of what you're saying....but can you give more information so we can help you to make her slip up or help to point out where she may be slipping up? If not I understand because you won't want to give up too much in case someone lurking knows her and can tip her off. I would most definitely keep it off of Facebook. 

LeenieLane

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-advice-preferably-law-but-whoever-am-pissed?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:d3a01a30-7b58-4e04-8a4f-7d32c6a364a1Post:df74449f-6e34-45cf-962d-327ebd66fa00">Re: Need Advice Preferably from that know about law but whoever I am pissed</a>:
[QUOTE]Could you give a friend that you trust a small amount of money and tell them to donate it? You should then be able to tell if your sis' friend kept it or not, right?
Posted by NicoleSahara[/QUOTE]

<div>This is incredibly genius. Good work, Detective!</div><div>
</div><div>PS - beautiful signature photo!!! I thought it was Jessica Simpson for a second there!</div>

chelseamb11

There must be a special place for people like that.. who steal from both victims AND from people trying to help those victims.  Horrible.

ricksang

I agree Chels.

StephBeanWed61502

I love Nicole's idea.  Also, once you have proof from your test donation, contact the district attorney office local to this girl and let them know what she's up to.  This is criminal fraud, and they should be able to advise you of next steps.

ricksang

Thanks Steph.

LittleMissCutiePie

Please update us when you find out for sure! I want to see this girl get slammed with a huge suit!

ricksang

I will LMC.

tiffad

Uhm, don't have them donate cash. Make sure the donation is made in check form and CLEARLY marked as a donation and who should be receiving this donation and what is it for. Then go to the police and file a report with the evidence.

ricksang

Umm if we give her a check she has no choice but to give it to my mom because the check wold be in my mom's name. Why would I give the girl a check in her name? But thanks for the passive aggressive comment.

tiffad

That is not a passive aggressive comment. That is a way to legally track the money. The check does not have to be written out to your mom, pay to the order of, but the notation, called the memo, needs to say what/who is is for. There is no way to track cash. It becomes a he said she said situation and it is extremely difficult to build a case from that.