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What should I do? I need help!

thyangthyang
First Comment
in Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
Maybe this should be posted to other boards. But I love DFW board and read every post here. So hopefully I could get some advice from you guys. :-)

I am planning my wedding and looking at date around Feb/Mar 2011. My dress arrives end of Jan. One of my good friend is pregnant and due at middle of April. She lives out of town. She really want to come to my wedding but she couldn't travel from March to May.

I know June is really popular and don't think I could get anything nice since I am just planning now. And I don't want to wait to get married in summer of Texas but also really prefer to get the wedding done by September. (I am those impatient type...)

So now what left me is Feb. But FI and I are moving in Feb and I couldn't find any month that works for this situation. What should I do?

I love her and am willing to wait for her for ~4 months but deep down, I am frustrated about the situation. Please please give me your advice.

Thanks sincerely.
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Re: What should I do? I need help!

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    serlaceserlace
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Is your good friend supposed to be in your wedding?  If not, then I wouldn't change my date for her.  Trying to move and do the final wedding details all in one month seems like a great big ball of stress waiting to happen.  Also, if you wait until after she has the baby - she honestly might not be able to come.  My BM had an emergency last minute C-section and wasn't released to travel or go back to work until 8 weeks after she had the baby.  Plus, if you ask my BM right now (3 months later) if she wants to travel with her new born - she will tell you there is no way.  And there is no way my BM would leave new baby to travel somewhere overnight.  How pissed would you be if you waiting until June and she didn't attend?

    This, of course, is just my opinion.  The other knotties may have other opinions.  :)
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    carmen9311carmen9311 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    i agree with PP. don't change the date that you like for your friend (i would only change the date if immediate family would be unable to make it). you never know what comes up for people. 
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    thyangthyang
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    She is not in my wedding party. I am planning to have only one bridesmaid who is family. But I was her maid of honor. I don't know why this wedding thing never works well between us. She changed her wedding last minute onto one of my trips and I have to cancel my ticket and hotel to be at her wedding....
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    SoonToBeMrsHozSoonToBeMrsHoz member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Things change in life that you can't predict.. so  don't move your wedding date for your friend.

    I was supposed to be in a friend's wedding coming in March but she pulled a horrible stunt at my wedding and I haven't spoken to her since.. not saying something like would happen to you , but I am just saying you never know what might happen to so don't plan the most important day of your life (thus far) based on a friend's availability.
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    bsn1752bsn1752 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If she's not in your wedding (well, even if she was)... don't change your date for someone.  She'll more than likely be there... even if she's pregnant!
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    fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Do what is best for you and your FI.  The people that are meant to be there will be.
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    JennaV26JennaV26
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Do not plan your wedding around your friend. I had originally planned my wedding for August but had to unexpectedly move it forward three weeks into July when we found out DH's school schedule. I had a friend who was overseas for grad school who really wanted to be a BM and she was really upset with me for moving my wedding back as she wasn't sure if she would still be able to attend (she was). The truth is that I had to tell her that there are only two people who I could plan my wedding around: DH and myself. The only people I would even consider moving my wedding for would be my parents or my sister.

    Also - Our wedding was July 24th. We moved three hours away on July 15th, came back for the week of the wedding and then came back down here the day after the wedding. Moving the wedding month sucks but it's definitely doable. It's all about planning and time management.

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    MissAngelMissAngel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I agree with pp.  I honestly would not change my date for anyone except FI, myself, and our parents.  I didn't include our siblings in there because he has 4 and I have 4 and I can't change things just for 1.  I also have  MOH that wanted TTC and would have ended up giving birth the month of my wedding, but we all decided to just deal with it when/if it happens. 

    You are marrying your FI and this is the first day of the rest of your lives.  It is a big day and to move for a friend doesn't seem logically to me.  Did she ask you to move it?  And I agree with serlace about newborns... your friend will be exhausted and will most likely not want to to leave her child or take the child to a wedding.
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    mralphamralpha
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yes I agree with StephieHall.  Do what is best for you and your FI.  It is your day. You might be surprised who will show up.
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