FMIL Invited??

kjreed

Need advice, my FI's cousin from out of state is coming down and I invited her to my bach party, she then asked me if it was okay for her Mom to come to bach party (they are very close) I said I didn't have a problem with it if she wanted to.  Her Mom is my FMIL's sister, she then asked if my FMIL and my FI's grandmother were coming too (not a typical grandma) I said I didn't know I hadn't asked them..... so here is my question am I totally out of the loop because I didn't know my FMIL and FI's Grandmother were supposed to be invited to my bach. party??  They are from a small town, maybe this is a regional tradition... please help!

loop0406

I'm from Houston and it's not typical to invite grandmas to bachelorette parties. I would invite FMIL and his grandma to bridal shower, not bachelorette fiesta

trix1223

In our circle, moms and/or grandmas are not included in b-parties.  I didn't attend either my DD's nor my DIL's b-parties, and I didn't expect to be asked.

MairePoppy

I'm an MOB, who does not expect to be invited to my DD's bachelorette, if she has one.  I think of that as a night out for my DD and her friends.

If you're inviting FMIL's sister, though, I think your going to have to include the moms and probably the grandmothers.

PenelopeSnuz

Where I'm from, Moms & Grandmas sometimes come to the dinner/gifts beginning part of bachelorette parties and not the crazy bar part.

We're going to a lakehouse in Michigan for a weekend for my bachelorette party.  Moms and Grandmas are coming, we are going to play bunko, go to the beach, and go wine tasting at a local winery.

Manwaithiel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_fmil-invited?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:2d3eae9d-206d-468a-9cd4-248e79ee5255Post:eb31a371-9c18-4f76-abb6-27066bfebb27">Re: FMIL Invited??</a>:
[QUOTE]Where I'm from, Moms & Grandmas sometimes come to the dinner/gifts beginning part of bachelorette parties and not the crazy bar part. We're going to a lakehouse in Michigan for a weekend for my bachelorette party.  Moms and Grandmas are coming, we are going to play bunko, go to the beach, and go wine tasting at a local winery.
Posted by PenelopeSnuz[/QUOTE]

Oh my gosh you play bunko??

I thought that was something only my mom and her friends did. Sorry for that out of nowhere moment =)

Moving on...

Is it just me, or am I the only one who thinks it's kind of weird that she's inviting people to the bachelorette party? Isn't that mostly up to the host of the party?

kjreed

Thanks for letting me know I haven't been rude by not inviting them already, I don't have a problem with them coming I guess I just didn't think it was their scene at all!  Yes, I was a little surprised she was asking if her Mom could come....

beamer84

I don't think it's weird that the bride is "inviting" people to the b-party. My MOH asked me for the invitee list, and she came back to me a few times about people I may have forgotten about. She didn't want to invite anyone I didn't want to celebrate with. I def wanted my party to be a "friends only" thing (no MOB or MOG)

My mother was totally cool with not being invited to the b-party. the MOG kept asking if she was invited, and I kept saying that no, I wanted just me and my friends. I told her my own mother wasn't invited. I think she may have been a little disappointed by this, but I would have felt awkward hanging out with her like that. I just wanted a comfortable and chill night with my girls (which they delivered, and it was an awesome party).

deb84

In my area/group of friends the Mother's usually attend the dinner/gift part of the party but then head home and we head out to the bar(s).  One friend had her mom and FMIL join back up with us at the after party at a freind's house but most mother's wouldn't want to come to an after hours party I wouldn't think.    I could be wrong though.  I agree with whoever posted that if you invite your/his Aunt then you kind of have to invite the mother's.  (It would be rude not to.)  So if I were you I could very kindly explain to the Aunt that you want it to be a "friend" only outing.  If that is impossible suck it up and invite the mother's.  Hope they don't attend or that they at least call it a night early.

emmagfunk03

I think it depends on the kind of b-party you're planning to have. If it's a wine tasting kind of affair, like above, then I think it would be fine. But if you're wanting to get pretty wild and get intimate gifts, I think it's weird. I went to a b-party where the MOB bought her daughter lingerie, talking p*nis toys, and all sorts of sexually related garb. It was super awkward for us girlfriends -- even if she has a close enough relationship with her mother, we don't. We kind of thought we'd get to enjoy the p*nis cake and other games with just us girls, not the MOB. 

Maybe I'm wrong, but I thought it was weird. I told my mom about it and she informed me that under no circumstances does she want to be invited to my b-party, that it's something for me and my friends to do. But I guess it depends.