pre-wedding parties...

lucyloo1002

is it rude of me to suggest ideas for my pre-wedding parties (bacholorette party, bridal showers)?  i know that my mom is throwing a bridal shower, but its going to be for her side of the family only.  i'm not looking to have a bunch of showers/parties just to get gifts, but i would definalty like to spend time with FI's family and celebrate with my friends prewedding.  i guess i'm asking if it would be rude of me to suggest to FMIL to have a bridal shower for her family, and to MOH to have one for my friends?  or should i just plan one?  in no way am i looking to get more gifts, so don't even think that...

banana468

Yes it would be rude to suggest.

If they ask  for suggestions then it's fine to offer, but it's not for you to mention or plan.

quotequeen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_pre-wedding-parties?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:aa94aafd-a185-418e-b1e7-ccea1c56b052Post:969fd60f-b783-4604-9c9e-a26f967c5089">pre-wedding parties...</a>:
[QUOTE]is it rude of me to suggest ideas for my pre-wedding parties (bacholorette party, bridal showers)?  i know that my mom is throwing a bridal shower, but its going to be for her side of the family only.  i'm not looking to have a bunch of showers/parties just to get gifts, but i would definalty like to spend time with FI's family and celebrate with my friends prewedding.  i guess i'm asking if it would be rude of me to suggest to FMIL to have a bridal shower for her family, and to MOH to have one for my friends?  or should i just plan one?  in no way am i looking to get more gifts, so don't even think that...
Posted by lucyloo1002[/QUOTE]


Suggesting <em>ideas</em> is borderline, but that's not actually what you're talking about.  You're asking if you can suggest that somebody throw you a party.  That's a huge no-no.

SuMmErKuTiE

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_pre-wedding-parties?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:aa94aafd-a185-418e-b1e7-ccea1c56b052Post:e4df5a02-7b66-4ae6-9d0d-85fe4aaeea35">Re: pre-wedding parties...</a>:
[QUOTE]Yes it would be rude to suggest. If they ask  for suggestions then it's fine to offer, but it's not for you to mention or plan.
Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

Ditto this exactly. My mom and MOH asked me what I would want for a bridal shower theme, and I said a tea party would be fun. They ended up throwing me a mad hatter tea party since they know I love Alice and Wonderland. They took my suggestion (after asking me for it) and kicked it up a notch. It was a wondeful shower.

trix1223

Yes, it's rude.  You CAN hang out with FI's family and your friends, and your family, you know.  Have a BBQ.  Have a picnic.  Have a party.  Have several.  Have them at your place.  Just don't make them wedding related.

The fact that you're engaged doesn't mean that every get together has to be about or even related to your wedding.

lucyloo1002

kay.. thanks ya'll..