Pre-wedding Parties

Rehersal Dinner

So when my fiance's sister got married a year ago her father gave her $10,000 for the wedding plus a nice wedding gift.  Now that me and her brother are getting married in Feb - we've gotten nothing.  My fiance thinks his father will give us a generous gift since we are registered for our honeymoon.  But my question is this - would it be terribly rude to bring up his father contributing towards a rehersal dinner?  Etiquette says that "Father pays for the wedding (which he did for the sister) and that Father of the Groom pays for rehersal dinner.  

Any thoughts?  Since we are three months out and he hasn't offered to we just go ahead and foot the bill?  

Both my FSIL and FI get along the same with their father.  Its not like there is a favored child I just think that she had the guts to ask for help and we haven't.  And he is very, very well off by the way.  

I'm not trying to be greedy either its just that without some help, our rehersal dinner will literally have to be at our place home cooked or a local pizza joint.    

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Re: Rehersal Dinner

  • edited December 2011
    You should never ask someone for money for your wedding unless they have already specified something like, "Hey, I'm paying; just let me know how much!"
    imageDaisypath Wedding tickers
  • ViczaesarViczaesar member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    It would be extremely rude to ask someone to pay for your rehearsal dinner.  If no one offers, you pay for it yourself.  And no, etiquette does not dictate that anyone pay for your rehearsal - that's tradition, which is not the same thing.  No one owes you paying anything for your wedding, so plan with that in mind and if someone offers money or to host the rehearsal dinner, consider that a bonus.



  • RailWayWifeRailWayWife member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Do not ask him to pay for the wedding, you risk seriously offending him
  • blush64blush64 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My RD will be something simple like at home or a pizza place. I'm ok with that because that's what I can afford.

    Do NOT ask for money no matter how much he has. It's rude.
  • edited December 2011
    You can't ask anyone to host it. If no one offers you need to host. 
  • edited December 2011
    Our RD will probably end up at my mom's house... We're paying for 99% of the wedding ourselves... so we're on a budget.
    I did ask my mom if we could use her house for the RD, but I didn't ask her to pay for anything.
    So our plan is to save by having it at my moms and then having some friends of ours (professional caterers) do the cooking. But we'll pay for all the food and drinks and everything.
    So we're just doing it our own way.
    Your dinner can be whatever you want it to be! :)
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