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Wishing to Uninvite... (yeah - drama & vent)

dianaslikdianaslik member
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in Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
Ugh - so we had invited one of FI's co-workers and her husband to our reception (they have worked together for almost 10 years, they also have been friends).  They've visited our house, FI painted motorcycle parts for the husband, I'm friends with her on FB (well until about 3 min ago), etc.

Well, FI just let me know that she just royally screwed him at work - reporting him for "suspicious behavior" which the boss - another friend of theirs - shrugged off, knowing better (some items stolen in the last few months).  She then took it upon herself to approach another employee (ironically, a guy FI has known for around 20 years) to mention to keep an eye on FI... that guy went and told his boss (because this made him uncomfortable) who is another buddy of FI's and called FI to tell him what was going on.
FI's boss doen't have any suspicions about him - and this chick is acting all normal and cheerful to FI's face...

Now, obviously, he doesn't want her at our reception... I haven't gotten an RSVP yet, but invitations were mailed weeks ago.
I guess we are just stuck.
(FI is really upset  - feels totally betrayed).
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Re: Wishing to Uninvite... (yeah - drama & vent)

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    bsn1752bsn1752 member
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    edited December 2011
    Yuck!  Hopefully she doesn't end up coming since obviously the air is going to be tense... sorry that you're going through that.  People suck sometimes!
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    [Deleted User][Deleted User]
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    edited December 2011
    Ugh I agree, people do suck. Hang in there, it will all work out. And if she does show up to the wedding, you can deal with it then. Otherwise, no stressing out about it now- you have enough to worry about! :) Enjoy the weekend and sorry you guys are going through this!
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    Tiffany618Tiffany618
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    edited December 2011
    Ugh - Etiquette doesn't have to apply to backstabbers, right?  I vote un-invite.

    Seriously, if the bosses and co-workers didn't know your FI well then she could have seriously gotten him in trouble or even fired.
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    DFWIndianDFWIndian
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    edited December 2011
    I agree with Tiffany! I vote uninvite if she RSVPs yes. I'm sorry you have to deal with this, but there must be something going on for her to turn on him like this. Did something with you guys?? Why would she have it out for him?
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    NathanandJordanNathanandJordan
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    edited December 2011
    Yuck, sounds like a sticky situation!  If it were me I would be passive aggressive  b!tchy and seat her in the kitchen or somewhere equally awful ;)

    ETA:  Just to let everyone know, I wouldn't actually do this.  Wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea about me!
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    KendallandAlbertKendallandAlbert member
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    edited December 2011
    Ouch, tough situation.  :( Personally, I would have FI talk to her and figure out where this came from.  From there, he can decide how he wants to proceed.  I personally would ask her to not attend :P
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    juliebug1997juliebug1997 member
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    edited December 2011
    That's a really tough situation, Diana!  Maybe they'll decide not to come after all.
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    dianaslikdianaslik member
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    edited December 2011

    Thanks, y'all.

    I think FI is going to talk to her next week (when he's not so pissed and can retain some level of professionalism).  Even if it gets resolved to his comfort level for the workplace, I still doubt he'll want her to come/consider her a friend again.

    @Deepthi: He really doesn't know!  Heck, she was thanking him this morning for painting some motorcycle parts for her husband this morning (and all this started yesterday).  It's VERY bizarre.

    I guess we shall just wait & see...
    Maybe a diplomatic: "after what transpired at work, we'd prefer you did not attend our reception" will work.  Hoping they will just understand that after this crap, they probably shouldn't come.

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    meghanttu08meghanttu08
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    edited December 2011
    That sounds awful! Good thing that your FI's bosses are cool about it though. I would just wait and see what she RSVP's. If she doesn't reply, don't bother contacting her. I think you are on the right track...well your FI is on the right track...for going to go talk to her professionally. Just wait it out and see what happens. If worst comes to worst and she/they do show up, there will be plenty of other family and friends there you can talk to more.
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    TexanTreasure08TexanTreasure08 member
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    edited December 2011
    I would wait and see if they even RSVP yes. If they do, I would have FI say what you said, "after what transpired at work, we'd prefer that you not attend our reception." I don't think you should follow etiquette so closely that it makes you extremely uncomfortable on your wedding day.
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    manellomanello
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh, that just sucks!  I have had to deal with backstabbing (and nice to your face) people like that before and know how it is not fun!

    Good luck and let us know what happens next week when he talks to her!
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