Registry and Gift Forum

Registry Update

So a little while back, I posted about my Mom complaining that I didn't have enough "nice" (read expensive) items on my registry.  I had registered for about 70 items that I really wanted/needed plus some upgrades.  Anyways, needless to say, my Mom invited 60 people to my shower (95% of which are her friends/family - yes they are all invited to the wedding) and from what's being purchased so far has been the more expensive items.  So now I think I need to add to my registry since by my calculations only 10 people have purchased gifts and I'm not going to have anything left for the other 50.

I'm just having a hard time registering for new pots/pans when mine are perfectly fine and crystal when I know I would rarely use it and my Mom & Grandma each have a complete set in the same pattern that services 12 (so that's a service of 24 if I combine them).  I know that I will be inheriting some of it one day.

Any suggestions?  Did anyone else have "registry guilt"?

Re: Registry Update

  • edited January 2013
    There have to be some nice things that you will actually use. If you like to cook, do you already have really high quality pots and pans? Dutch oven? Cast iron skillet? What about appliances, like a crockpot, blender, food processor, juicer, bread machine, stand mixer, etc? Serving pieces and utensils? Barware?

    Don't forget other rooms. Bedding is pricey stuff. Really plush towels, high thread count sheets, duvet and cover, new down pillows, etc. A good quality vacuum cleaner.

    And honestly, no, I didn't feel guilty about making a registry. People want to give gifts for a wedding, and they needed to know what I* would like. That said, a few of my favorite gifts were off-registry, like the awesome pottery soup bowls/mugs we got that are replicas of Civil War era dishes.

    ETA: *I say I mainly because H got bored with registering after 20 minutes in Target. But he did help and we put fun things like board games on there too.
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  • I agree, bedding is expensive and a nice upgrade would be good, and maybe a spare set for your guest room.  H always runs hot, so we registered for a blanket for us to use in the summer since I'm always cold....it was $100 and I never would have spent the money on my own, but I love it!  American's Test Kitchen recipes use dutch ovens often, and those are very expensive too, so we registered for one.  Kitchenaid, I had one before the wedding, but I love it, so if you don't have one, that is pretty standard.  We got a boatload of towels because we still had ones from college.  I registered for enough for us to use in between laundry, plus assuming we had guests.  A quality vacuum is great (no one bought us this), and I really wanted a carpet cleaner because of our dog and it might be my favorite thing!

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  • Ditto artbyallie on not feeling guilty.  It sounds like you have a good variety of lower-priced items, so I don't think you need to worry about looking greedy.  This is the time to get things that will last you a long time, and it's ok to replace something and donate the old item.  

    Some ideas:
    - Throw blankets and blankets you can thrown on your bed (and guest bed) for when it's super cold, like now (I love LL Bean point blankets, the wool ones--you could add those to an Amazon universal registry)
    - Nice bakeware...WS goldtouch?
    - Food processor
    - Blender (I have had the Magic Bullet for years, when we combined our stuff, we donated DH's regular blender, because he likes the Magic Bullet a lot more)
    - Cookbooks (unlikely to be that expensive, but could be combined)
    - Stand mixer and electric hand mixer, if you do a lot of baking
    - Immersion blender
    - Electric teapot
    - Serving pitchers
    - Serving platters (sectional ones for veggies and dip, chips, etc.)
    - Serving bowls that match your dishes or compliment them
    - Wine glasses (if you already have the basics, consider registering for a set of stemless--I use ours a lot for casual get togethers and if I'm just having a glass of wine with dinner)
    - New nonstick skillet (they only last so long, I recommend T-Fal)
    - Tablecloth and cloth napkins (fancy and casual) 
  • So my issue is this - most of what you have listed I either already have and really like what I currently have (amazing vacuum cleaning, Dutch oven, electric teapot, everyday dishes, china, lots of glasses) or I registered for and it's already been purchased off my registry (bedding, 3 sets of sheets, towels, flatware, serving items).

    So I'm now at the point of either I start adding crystal (when I know that I personally probably won't use it and I know that I will be inheriting a set someday from my grandma) or I start upgrading things that I don't really need to upgrade.  For example, I have a good set of cast iron pots & pans that I love.  That's all I use actually.  But they were my great aunt's so they are not new or matching.  I guess I'm just having a hard time justifying putting a $200 frying pan on my registry when mine is perfectly fine.  And then what do I do with what I currently have?  Give it to my sisters who will probably end up doing exactly the same thing some day when they get married?  It just seems wasteful to me and they kinda have sentimental value already because they were from within my family.

    The other piece of it is that FI and I are saving up for a house.  So I purposely had a small registry so people would get the hint that we really would like cash to help with the down payment.  Where I'm from, it's customary for people give cash at the wedding a physical gifts at the shower.  So I'm hoping to have enough just to get through the shower.  I just kinda look at it that if people are going to give X overall, I'd rather get more in cash to use it for a downpayment/future renovations/new furniture than stuff that I don't really need/will use.

    I don't know if that makes sense to anyone but that's where I'm stuck.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_registry-update?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:d85aff2e-bc9c-4a95-a771-7e011e54897ePost:1dcc49ad-15ee-4fdd-8ecd-ab312a830288">Re: Registry Update</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you don't want anymore stuff, don't register for anymore stuff. If people want to spend a lot on a shower gift they can buy several smaller items.
    Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]
    That's what I figured most people would do.  But the problem is that I'm running out of stuff.  I still have about 50 people who haven't purchased gifts (assuming that everyone buys off the registry of course) and I only have 30 smaller items left (pizza stone, kitchen tools, that type of thing).  So I need to add stuff so I don't end up with "pink elephant" gifts that I might not be able to return.

    The throw blankets are a good idea - I can always use more of those.  And even though I registered for 3 sets of sheets, I could always put another set or 2 on there (it's not like I won't use them someday).  Same goes for towels.  I think I'll do some "shopping" and see what else I can come up with.
  • If you want to upgrade your stuff, then register for upgrades.  Remember that you can always have a yard sale, or better yet donate your old items.   

    Even if you don't want crystal glasses, you could look for things like vases, pitchers, candy dishes, serving dishes, etc.    You can also register for "non-traditional" items like camping gear, recreational items (like board games), small elecronics like a digital camera or HD video camera, stuff like that.  
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