"No Box" Gift Registry

fritzm731

My fiancé and I live in Wisconsin but are getting married in my hometown in Florida. Right from the wedding we leave on a 10 cruise and then leave the ship and head directly to the airport to fly home. If guests bring gifts to the wedding we will not be able to get them home with us. My parents would need to ship them after the wedding but with the cost of shipping these days it does not seem worth it to ship a toaster. Any thoughts on how to tastefully say no box gifts? Or to say if you wish to purchase something off the registry to have it shipped direct to our house? We are only going to include this information on our wedding website but I still am not sure how to convey our message. We don’t really need anything for our home so my fiancé suggested just registering for large items so people won’t want to bring them with them anyways, such as lawn furniture, but I don’t think that is really the answer to our problem.

jagore08

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_registering-gifts_no-box-gift-registry?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:34Discussion:e96ec93d-4498-48cc-9669-057bc8e133c5Post:f72111fd-50f9-4068-a74b-ff08338a3ca2">"No Box" Gift Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]My fiancé and I live in Wisconsin but are getting married in my hometown in Florida. Right from the wedding we leave on a 10 cruise and then leave the ship and head directly to the airport to fly home. If guests bring gifts to the wedding we will not be able to get them home with us. My parents would need to ship them after the wedding but with the cost of shipping these days it does not seem worth it to ship a toaster. Any thoughts on how to tastefully say no box gifts? Or to say if you wish to purchase something off the registry to have it shipped direct to our house? We are only going to include this information on our wedding website but I still am not sure how to convey our message. We don’t really need anything for our home so my fiancé suggested just registering for large items so people won’t want to bring them with them anyways, such as lawn furniture, but I don’t think that is really the answer to our problem.
Posted by fritzm731[/QUOTE]
This question is asked daily on the knot. <div>
</div><div>It is rude to mention gifts at all to your guests.  Make a registry of what you need.  Most guests know to ship gifts to your home especially if they do online shipping.  If they happen to bring anything to your ceremony then it's your responsibility to figure out how to get them to your home.  Shipping isn't that expensive if you do ground.  If your guests are going to be nice enough to get you a gift, you can find a way to accept if gracefully and get it to your home.</div><div>
</div><div>For the record, DH and I lived together for over 7 years before we were married so we had the necessities.  We found things to upgrade and little things that could make our daily lives easier.  We also live in California but were married in our hometown in Florida.  Most of our guests gave us a monetary gift or had the gift shipped to our home.  For the few that actually brought gifts to our home, we arranged with our parents to have the gifts sent to our home in Cali and reimbursed them for shipping.  </div>

AdeleDazeem

I really have a problem with "Well, WE don't want to pay to ship stuff to our home, so YOU, GUEST, need to pay for it."  I know you don't mean it that way, but that is how it comes across.

Make a super small registry.  People will get the hint that you don't want gifts and most will give cash.  Any gifts you do get, you can ship home with some of the money you recieve.  That's the most tasteful way to go about this.

amymaysa

In Response to Re: "No Box" Gift Registry:
[QUOTE]I really have a problem with "Well, WE don't want to pay to ship stuff to our home, so YOU, GUEST, need to pay for it."  I know you don't mean it that way, but that is how it comes across. Make a super small registry.  People will get the hint that you don't want gifts and most will give cash.  Any gifts you do get, you can ship home with some of the money you recieve.  That's the most tasteful way to go about this.
Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]


I couldn't agree more with the bolded statement. People may give you a boxed gift, so pay a few bucks to ship it. Shipping isn't that expensive and I doubt anyone will buy you a 10 pound gift

Simply Fated

"I couldn't agree more with the bolded statement. People may give you a boxed gift, so pay a few bucks to ship it. Shipping isn't that expensive and I doubt anyone will buy you a 10 pound gift"

Just don't register for things like a refrigerator.

I agree, too. Not wanting to pay for shipping, so suggesting that the guests should pay for shipping sounds strange to me.

I would just make a small registry or none at all. Maybe registering for small or light things might help?

If you want to go through with it, maybe you could hint at the bottom of the registry by putting your address on it or something?
BBB's shipping costs are based on how much the item costs and not by weight, if I remember correctly.
I think Amazon has free shipping, if it's over a certain price. $25, I think. Target's is over $50 and Macy's uses has free shipping promotions.

Otherwise, UPS, the USPS and that other one, really do have decent shipping deals. So if all else fails, you can ship the items to your home. It'll cost you some money, but that's the choice you made by planning out your itinerary the way you did.

pkontk

Spread the word that you're leaving on your honeymoon directly after the wedding.  I'm sure most of the guests already know that you live far away from the wedding site and will be mindful of that when purchasing wedding gifts.

meganb1977

Also, someone in your hometown in Florida could return the boxed gifts that can be easily returned and get you a store credit to spend in the store where you live, on the same items or on items you wanted more.  Shipping costs avoided except to send an envelope containing the gift cards!

mbuckley85

For some reason, I don't think only registering for only large items is the answer to your problem...

Avion22

If a guest buys you a gift online, then they are going to pay to ship it one way or the other -- it costs no more for them to ship it to the address you specify on your registry than it would cost them to ship it to themselves (then they would have to lug it to the reception).   

We live in the UK and got married in Virginia.  Only one person brought a gift to the wedding, and it was a family heirloom that they wanted to pass directly to us.  Almost everyone else shipped gifts to our APO address, which was the one listed on the registry (we're military -- shipping to APO costs the same as shipping domestically).  A few people sent things to my parent's address (the one on the invitations), and we paid to have those shipped to the UK or stored in the US until the end of our overseas tour (neither is expensive).  

divinemsbee

I moved almost all of my clothes and a few other items from MS to UT and then from UT to FL parcel post through USPS. Nothing broke, it got to its destination within about 10 days. You can even put insurance or delivery confirmation on it. Easy-peasy. It's really not that expensive. My mom just mailed me a computer printer for about $30. Really, for just a few gifts it's no big deal. Also, if it can fit into one of the Priority Mail boxes it ships for a flat rate and gets there in 2 days. It's how I do almost all Christmas presents and how my mom send Christmas and Easter stuff to my and my siblings. 

swanrat

Could you return gifts to the store in FL and repurchase them once you are home in WI?

kmmssg

Please don't return them only to repurchase them.  This is why a lot of stores have such stiff requirements when it comes to returns - it costs them money for you to do this.

You guys don't get married until next spring so you need to put some money from the budget aside to ship them if you get any.

You never mention gifts in any way except the registry info that is sometimes in the shower invitation.  "No box gifts" is incredibly rude and it would probably make me decline attending because I would be THAT offended.  If I did come, you'd get a boxed gift.

My  DD came home to MI from UT for her bridal shower.  She knew that if she accepted the shower, she accepted the responsibility of getting her gifts home.  She and FI had them at Fed EX that evening.

If there is an option on your registries to ask that gifts be shipped to your home that is great!  If there is not, you put your most gracious smile on, warmly accept any gift brought to your wedding, and ship it home.  NO gift is unworthy of getting it home.