Where Do I start?

meggiemae85

This is my second wedding. The first one was taken care of by my awesome family in a month and a half. This one I am doing all by myself and I have no idea what I am doing. My fiance is in the military and we are planning on getting married after he gets back from being deployed because they get a month of block leave after that (that way all our friends can come). I am looking ta venues but I also have a million other things to do as well. I know what I want for a theme and it is very specific so those venues that take care of everything make me nervous. My first wedding cake was a disaster with fake plants coming out of it and it was a pukey shade of green. So I am not so sure about using a cake that the venue provides. I was thinking about doing the  small things first and then booking the venue, worrying about decorations, etc when we book the venue. Any advice?

Muffin'sMom

Hopelessly confused.....

kimp67

Hmmmm  I would say pick a date & venue first.  Then depending on what the venue provides go from there.  Next would be your officiant, your dress, caterer, photographer, wedding party & their attire, flowers, music, cake, invitations, decorations, favors.......
The knot has a "my checklist" thing that's very helpful.  Take a deep breath, relax & enjoy!
Good Luck!

Lisa50

Keep things simple and, I agree, once you've determined your budget, start with your date ... then, go find a place.  Officiant for sure.  To minimize stress, downsize the wedding party (one on each side is enough).  Try not to get caught up in things anyone other than you and your fiance want.  If you don't care about a fancy dress, don't get one.  If the thought of DIY makes you crazy, don't succumb to the temptation. 

Real Simple Weddings Magazine has a great guide to wedding planning.  You can pick it up in a book store's section.  Also, take a look at wedding websites, for instance stylemepretty.com, which may provide much needed inspiration.

Good luck and have fun!!

red1115

First up - Congrats!
Second - stay flexible.  When dealing with the military, anything can change so be sure to spell out any clauses in your contracts with vendors.  We rescheduled our wedding 3 times in six months, but thankfully our vendors understood the military component and worked with us to find dates that worked.  Also ask about military discounts - it can't hurt.
Third - Don't get so attached to your theme that you forget the meaning of the day!
Fourth - Set a budget before you start looking at venues & such.  If you dont set a budget- you'll go over it!

Good Luck!!

Lilaclover88

Spend some time reflecting on things you really love. This will inspire your creativity and make the ideas start flowing! 

Also knowing the time of year your wedding will take place can be a starting point for gaining inspiration.

Imagine different venues for your ceremony. Where do you envision saying " I do"...indoors at a church? outdoors in a garden?  something traditional or something unique to reflect your lives? Choose what feels right  and comfortable for you both.

After dreaming about your ideal wedding, go out and visit locations. Tour possible venues. Talk about what you can really afford...not what you hope you can spend.

I often get overwhelmed by all the beautiful possibilities when I look at other bride's photos and DIY projects. Sometimes I begin to question my own ideas and plans and start wishing that I could somehow add another project to improve my wedding...but then reality slaps me awake! LOL!

I agree that you need to relax and enjoy the journey! Best wishes!

thealphabride

The pp gave great advice! Congrats and welcome to the board!

ichellemay1

Another thing that might help is to check your local board for vendor reviews, etc.  That may help in narrowing down the venue decision.

meggiemae85

Thanks for all the advice!

Sue-n-Kevin

A bit late here, but I think the advice provided is very helpful. Also, welcome!

We found a venue that allowed us to bring in our own caterer, alcohol, items, etc. In all honesty, I've had over a year of planning already, with another 9 months to go. If I'd known that finding all the right vendors (food, alcohol, linens, rentals) just for the reception, without the rest (DJ, photographer, officiant) wouldn't save me as much as I'd thought, I would have gone with an all-inclusive venue, ie banquet hall.

But you will get a LOT of advice on your local board from brides who have posted their vendors (if they do that), or you can ask them. Word of caution, narrow down your choices to 1-3 before asking, many of the brides on other boards (not this one) get "testy" with a lot of questions of new members. Always read the posted notes at the top first to get a feel for your particular board.

Looking forward to hearing all your plans as they develop.