I'll keep this as short as I can manage.
I'm from a really small family so I very much wanted a small wedding.
FMIL is paying for the majority of it.
The wedding is in FI's (and FMIL's) hometown in his church in his religion (of which I do not belong.)
FI and FMIL invited everyone in their family, even the ppl the FI had originally protested because he doesn't know who they are.
Out of 165 people (including plus ones) on the guestlist, 75% are from his family. Realistically, only 8 people are going to show up for me alone that aren't mutual friends of ours.
FMIL offered to send out the invitations. I know she's sneaked invitations before at FI's brother's wedding but I had told her how apprehensive I am of the big wedding and so many people. I needed the help so I let her do it.
It turns out that she took the extra invitations and mailed them to coworkers, a total of 20 extra people (including plus ones), without telling us.
I flipped out. I feel like I've been quite accomodating and I finally got comfortable with the guestlist as big as it was. She knew my concerns and worries and still thought "it wouldn't be a big deal." Yes, she is paying for the majority (not all) of the wedding, but we still have a very well-defined budget where we all run out of money. Now I have to cut corners to get the things I want. (And I've been pretty damn crafty and thrifty up to this point!)
Am I being an ungrateful bridezilla or is she being a MomZilla? All of our feelings are hurt and I don't know how to fix this in less than two months!