Ask Match-Maker to be Bridesmaid?

MissyNY82

OK, so my fiance and I met through a set-up.  He works with my cousin's wife and she thought we would make a great couple and she was right :-)  Now I'm not sure whether or not I should ask her to be a bridesmaid.  I already have 6 bridesmaids (including my matron of honor) and it looks like my fiance is only having 4 groomsmen (including his best man).  He is very close with her husband (my cousin) and is having him be a groomsmen and may even ask him to be his best man so I feel really bad not having his wife be a bridesmaid.  My cousin's wife is awesome, not only did she set my fiance and I up but I also hang out with her pretty frequently now that we live around the corner from each other.  I definitely want her to be part of our wedding but I'm just not sure how.  We're having a Rabbi perform the wedding ceremony but we were thinking of asking my cousin's wife to have a part in the ceremony, I'm not sure what but maybe the rabbi can let her do something?  Is that a good idea?  Should I ask her to be a bridesmaid too?  Do you think she'll be hurt if I don't?

AutumnFair

I am unfamiliar with Jewish weddings so you might want to ask your Rabbi if there is anything she can do. Other than that its up to you if you really want her as a BM, it sounds like you guys are just starting to become closer so I not sure. I don't think she would be hurt if she wasn't ask because you guys aren't really close yet. Being match maker doesn't mean she has to be a BM, and neither does her husband being in the WP. The choice is up to you, but you definitely are not required to make her apart of the WP.

orangecrush32

If you want her to be a BM, then make her one. Don't feel obligated to though. Idk how Jewish ceremonies work, but if there are readings maybe she would be able to do one of them. I'm not familiar with them at all though so hat might not be possible. Discuss it with for FI and Rabbi and see what the 3 of you can come up with.

kimp67

Ditto pps.  Someone also was a match-maker for FI & I.  I asked her to be a bm because if it wasn't for her we might have never met!

jerseydevil

Agree with PPs. From what you wrote in your post it sounds like she is very special to you and you have a close relationship. I would probably make her BM.

ambermorley

If you decide she won't be a bridesmaid, I think it would be a great idea to have her give a special toast at the reception. Introduce her as the match maker and have her say some words about why she thought to set you up. I think it would be a very special way to include her, and add something special to the celebration.

nyema_83

Re: Ask Match-Maker to be Bridesmaid? posted at 11/23/2010 1:45 PM CST on theknot.com

ambermorley Joined on 12-31-2008 DC AREA 4316662924180294 Total posts: 71 First: 8/15/2010 Last: 11/24/2010

If you decide she won't be a bridesmaid, I think it would be a great idea to have her give a special toast at the reception. Introduce her as the match maker and have her say some words about why she thought to set you up. I think it would be a very special way to include her, and add something special to the celebration.

Ditto!