Moms and Maids

2 sets of inlaws... what do i do????

My fiance and I have been together for 2 years now and I love him more than anything. When he was young his parents got divorced and since then have been in different relationships... His mother remarried last years and her husband has been in my fiance's life for over five years now and we all have a great relationship. His father has been with the same woman for 13 years now (great relationship as well). NOW... what do I do for the head table. We wont be having bridemaids or groomsmen all we wanted to do were our parents with us at the head table... where do I place who. If I place my parents next to me and then his next to eachother (they are very civilized by the way) it will make the table really un even... now i dont want to seperate the couples... what do i do... any suggestions????

Re: 2 sets of inlaws... what do i do????

  • noodle_oonoodle_oo member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You can NOT break up the couples!  (I know you didn't say you would, but to even suggest it is ridiculous!).  Worrying about the head table being even is silly.  What do you care more about, it looking symmetrical or your in laws feelings?  I would say, sit them where they want to be seated.  If they want to be at the head table, do that (since they are civil, doesn't sound like a problem).  If they would rather sit with their respective friends, do that.  I personally think head tables are outdated and most weddings I've been to they either do a sweetheart table for the couple or the B&G sit at a round banquet with their parents (that would be a nice option for you since it won't be "uneven" at a round table for the 8 of you).

    Good luck!
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You hve a sweetheart table for the two of you.  Then you let your parents host a table, his dad and SM host a table, his mom and SD host a table.  That way everyone will be comfortable with those they'd like to sit with, and you have some private time with your new DH.

    FWIW:  I was MOB last July.  I don't particularly care for my DD's in-laws.  I can be cordial when we have to be together, but we'll never, ever be friends.  It would have distinctly clouded my DD's reception had I been forced to sit with them for dinner. 

    Letting the families all host their own tables is your easiest solution.  GL
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  • duckie1905duckie1905 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It would be incredibly rude to split parents from their spouses.  Either include everyone a the table or just sit with your new husband at a sweetheart table and let them each host their own table.  As horrible as I think it is to separate your WP from their dates I think it is ten times worse to treat your parents this way.

    But, since you never said you were doing that.  Just sayin'
  • bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Don't have a head table.  Sit at a sweetheart table.  All couples stay together.  Done and done.

    All your posts involve putting form over substance.  Stop it.  Focus on what's really important, not this silly tertiary stuff that matters to NO ONE.
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  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Seeing as your wedding is over a year a way, I think you are worrying for no reason. You are way overthinking this. WAY overthinking.
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  • edited December 2011
    If you want to sit with all the parents, do it at a round table rather than a head table.  Head tables are not as popular as they were years ago, most couples today choose not to have one.  Your father would be to your right, then your mom to his right.  Continuing around the table would be your mom, the FOG, the FOG's lady, the SFOG, then the MOG seated next to her son who will be on your left.

    If you don't want all eight of you at one table, you and your FI can sit at a sweet-heart table, and each of the three sets of parents can host a table for their friends/family.
  • Kristin789Kristin789 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I'm going to answer your exact question, although I agree more with the other posters who are suggested a sweetheart table for you and FI, and then have your parents host Table 1, FI's mother + stepdad host Table 2, and FI's father + girlfriend host Table 3.


    Here is a balanced Head Table, as if you are the photographer standing in front of the table taking a photo of the people - this is who the photographer sees from LEFT to RIGHT:


    FOG's girlfriend
    FOG
    MOG's husband
    MOG
    Groom
    Bride
    FOB
    MOB
    Officiant
    Officiant's wife

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