How to ask girls to be your bridesmaid

julieacs17

 I am getting married in may 2013.   I already have my maid of honor and matron of honor.  I am having a hard time figuring out how to ask the other girls I would like to stand up in my wedding.

I have a hard time with friendships with women.  The girls I want to ask are people I really care about and always have a good time with, but we do not talk on a regular basis.  They also were close with my fiancé. 

I know there are a lot of obligations with accepting to be a bridesmaid, but really all I want these girls to do is buy a dress and be there for me on that day, which, I think, they would have no problem with.  I already have a make up artist and hair stylists that will take care of them on that day.

Where the difficulty lies is I do not want them to feel obligated to have me in their wedding parties when they get married.  I am afraid they will say no to me because of this fact.  I know they have sisters and other close girlfriends, and I do no feel like if I have them in mine, that they would have to ask me.  I wouldn't expect them to.  I just want them there for us on our day.

What would be the best way to ask them and to assure them that I do not expect them to return the gesture (unless they really want to) in the future?  Thanks for the help!

LDubHawksFan

Don't worry about that.  They won't have to have you in their WP, and their responsibilities really are just to show up and buy the dress.  Most women realize that it isn't tit for tat.  And for how to ask them, call. 

EK2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_how-to-ask-girls-to-be-your-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:96ba80aa-19a2-4be5-be7a-212410ed1a36Post:35aa1a86-353d-4723-8dcf-7615a3987344">How to ask girls to be your bridesmaid</a>:
[QUOTE] I am getting married in may 2013.   I already have my maid of honor and matron of honor.  I am having a hard time figuring out how to ask the other girls I would like to stand up in my wedding. I have a hard time with friendships with women.  The girls I want to ask are people I really care about and always have a good time with, but we do not talk on a regular basis.  They also were close with my fiancé.  I know there are a lot of obligations with accepting to be a bridesmaid, but really all I want these girls to do is buy a dress and be there for me on that day, which, I think, they would have no problem with.  I already have a make up artist and hair stylists that will take care of them on that day. Where the difficulty lies is I do not want them to feel obligated to have me in their wedding parties when they get married.  I am afraid they will say no to me because of this fact.  I know they have sisters and other close girlfriends, and I do no feel like if I have them in mine, that they would have to ask me.  I wouldn't expect them to.  I just want them there for us on our day. What would be the best way to ask them and to assure them that I do not expect them to return the gesture (unless they really want to) in the future?  Thanks for the help!
Posted by julieacs17[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>If you want them, ask them. Just tell them why you would like them in particular to be in your wedding party. <em>Don't </em>even a little bit mention their (potential) future weddings! </div>