Bridesmaid who can't afford dress!!

mandykaye842

Okay so it is 3 weeks before wedding and two of the bridesmaids just informed me they don't have the money to go pick up their dress, first off they already paid for half of the dress the time they ordered them which was in Decemeber.. All they owe is 65.00 left and they have had 5 1/2 months to pay for the rest of the dress!! and they have had a year to prepare for this.  I am so mad because they could have made $10 payments a month if they needed to so that when the dresses came in last week they would have been paid for!! I don't feel like I should feel sorry since me and my fiance already paid for their rooms the entire weekend and we got them all jewerly, personalized robes and other gifts.  What should I DO??? I want them to be in the wedding, but feel like if they can't get their own dress and they are throwing this on me at the last minute why should they be??

GoodLuckBear14

If it's "only" $65 then loan them the money with the understanding that they have to repay it.   I agree that if this dress was within the budget they gave you then they have no excuse.  At this point though, it's not worth getting angry.  This isn't something that needs to be a stressor for you so don't let it.

Maggie0829

I agree with GoodLuckBear.  Since $65 doesn't seem like a lot to you then I would go ahead and pay the remainder for them with the understanding that they must pay you back ASAP.  Yeah it sucks that they couldn't have told you sooner about their predicament but honestly this is an easy fix and certainly does not need to be stressing you out.  Just help out your friends and move on.

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bridesmaid-who-cant-afford-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:d84ecd84-a8d3-4a2e-8563-9b69d39d0a6cPost:308c49c1-e950-462d-8d82-2903b67cd411">Bridesmaid who can't afford dress!!</a>:
[QUOTE]Okay so it is 3 weeks before wedding and two of the bridesmaids just informed me they don't have the money to go pick up their dress, first off they already paid for half of the dress the time they ordered them which was in Decemeber.. All they owe is 65.00 left and they have had 5 1/2 months to pay for the rest of the dress!! and they have had a year to prepare for this.  I am so mad because they could have made $10 payments a month if they needed to so that when the dresses came in last week they would have been paid for!! I don't feel like I should feel sorry since me and my fiance already paid for their rooms the entire weekend and we got them all jewerly, personalized robes and other gifts.  What should I DO??? I want them to be in the wedding, but feel like if they can't get their own dress and they are throwing this on me at the last minute why should they be??
Posted by mandykaye842[/QUOTE]

Pay for the balances owed on the dresses. It's only $130, right?

oneday12

I agree with zitiquieen - pay the balance and move on.  

Kate61487

Ditto PP, except I wouldn't expect them to pay you back (make all the agreements with them you want, but when it comes to lending money you should never lend any amount that you're not comfortable losing, b/c sometimes friends don't come through...)

The only way to gaurantee they'll be there standing up next to you is to pay it yourself.  If you're okay with them maybe not being in the wedding tell them you're sorry but they'll have to figure something out (they probably have other friends who can spare $65 for a few weeks)

jmconley08

I am with the original poster on this one. I would be mad. While paying the $65 might be an easy solution is still isn't right of the bridesmaids to put this on the bride as long as they agreed to a certain price range beforehand.

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bridesmaid-who-cant-afford-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:d84ecd84-a8d3-4a2e-8563-9b69d39d0a6cPost:8c08131f-0876-4e7d-8cb5-362a4429e532">Re: Bridesmaid who can't afford dress!!</a>:
[QUOTE]I am with the original poster on this one. I would be mad. While paying the $65 might be an easy solution is still isn't right of the bridesmaids to put this on the bride as long as they agreed to a certain price range beforehand.
Posted by jmconley08[/QUOTE]

Nobody said she shouldn't be mad. The OP asked what she should do and we all said pay the balance that's owed and move on.

CassieCA

I agree, pay the $130, tell them you're loaning it to them, but realize you're probably never getting it back.  In fact I wouldn't even bring it up again after the wedding with the idea that "what's done is done" and is it really worth the stress and possibly losing the friendships over $130?

And it's ok to be pissed about it (you have every right to be), but at this point let it go, you have other things to think about.

Actually, that goes for the wedding day too.  This will be my 2nd marriage, and I think the best thing I did the day of for the 1st wedding was to realize that things WILL go wrong, nothing is perfect, and if I notice something is wrong just let it go.  I did just that and was really glad I did!