Adult Ring Bearer?

gnkz8412

we are planning a very low budget, low key, relaxed wedding. We aren't having a bridal party because I don't want to deal with the drama and added worries I've seen so many of my friends go through. But I have 2 sisters I want to try to include in our ceremony somehow... My older sister is very, very tomboyish. Like it's going to be hard to get her to wear something besides jeans and a t shirt!!! So I was thinking of making her my ring bearer? She wouldn't walk down the isle with a flower girl. She would just hold our rings and give them to us in the ceremony. Is that weird? Or I was thinking of making her an usher so she feels included. THoughts? 

evalentine1

I don't think its that weird. I've heard and seen pictures of a wedding with an adult male flower girl, so I don't think an adult female ring bearer is that out there. A great way to include family without having a bridal party, I think!

cschuma2

I'm not sure why calling her a bridesmaid and having her stand beside you with a bouquet of flowers is such drama.  Also, Let her wear pants if she wants. 

Personally, I would not agree to be someone's ring bearer.  What does she feel comfortable doing?

em01092

I mean, usually the child RB carries fake rings on the pillow, and the MOH and BM hold the real rings. So no, I don't think it would be weird for your sister to have your ring(s). 

naomikb

What I think is weird about this is that since she is tomboyish you think she should have a "boy's role" (ring bearer, usher).  Do you want her to be in your wedding party (bridesmaid)?  I think you should ask her to be in the role you really want to be in, regardless of her tomboy-nature and ask her what she would like to wear.  If it is pants, then so be it.

If she is a bridesmaid and part of the WP, then I don't think it's weird to have her carry the rings.

tehlilone

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_adult-ring-bearer?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:8771f984-1fad-4e58-b01a-58046e32e32aPost:da0cfb1f-8cad-4196-ba83-989d9a5ae9ff">Adult Ring Bearer?</a>:
[QUOTE]we are planning a very low budget, low key, relaxed wedding. We aren't having a bridal party because I don't want to deal with the drama and added worries I've seen so many of my friends go through. But I have 2 sisters I want to try to include in our ceremony somehow... My older sister is very, very tomboyish. Like it's going to be hard to get her to wear something besides jeans and a t shirt!!! So I was thinking of making her my ring bearer? She wouldn't walk down the isle with a flower girl. She would just hold our rings and give them to us in the ceremony. Is that weird? Or I was thinking of making her an usher so she feels included. THoughts? 
Posted by gnkz8412[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Since you are having a flower girl in your wedding party, I'm assuming you just aren't having bridesmaids and groomsmen instead. I don't see anything wrong with just having your sisters as your bridesmaids and not have to deal with drama friends include, but if you want to steer completely clear of that then it's alright.</div><div>
</div><div>I personally don't see anything wrong with your sister being the ringbearer but I think some people would view it as comical rather than sentimental. Unless the flower girl is your other sister, then I'd think that's just plain adorable. On that note, what is your other sister doing? It'd be nice if they were doing something of similar importance if possible, although that's not necessary. Being an usher is perfectly fine too. If you're worried about what she'll wear don't think that's as important. Many women wear slacks to weddings nowadays and it's not weird.</div>

erinandken2013

I think it's fine, so long as she's comfortable with it.

My daughter is 19, and I wanted her to be a bridesmaid. She wasn't really feeling that, so she is going to be our RING MAIDEN. We haven't worked out all of the details yet (exactly what she'll do -- I think it'll be weird to have her walk down the aisle w/ fake rings on a mini pillow), but it's a great way for her to be included AND feel comfortable. And, our "flower girl" is a FLOWER MATRON -- my 80-yr.-old grandmother! How adorable is that going to be?!