Alternative to Dollar Dance?

kelseyk23

I don't want to have a dollar dance at our reception because I don't like how it slows the flow of the reception down. Does anyone have any suggestions for another way to get donations from guests? I've heard of auctioning off the garter but I'm not sure how you'd go about that. Any suggestions would be wonderful! Thanks!

mags0607

In my region, dollar dances are popular although we are not doing one because we aren't comfortable with asking our guests for money. In my opinion there is no good way to ask for donations.
 
Your guests are already more than likely giving you gifts, and they are celebrating with you, don't ask them for more. The dollar dance is the only semi-appropriate one (and that is stretching it) anything else is bordeline tacky.

In the end its your wedding and you can do whatever you like, but know that some guests will think its inappropriate.

jeanna85

im confused. why are u trying to get money out of your guests?

skippylouwho

If they are your guests, why are you asking them for money? That doesn't make them guests, that makes them customers or clients.

I really am staying out of my DDs and her FI's wedding choices. I am determined that their day be their day - I am helping when asked, sending the things I find online that I KNOW they are looking for but otherwise I am keeping my mouth shut.

HOWEVER.... if anyone tries to pay my daughter to dance with her I will quietly go in to the restroom and throw up.  I can't even tell you how disgusting I find this tradition. It happens at soe weddings around here but not as many as often as it does in the other parts of our state.

If someone is a GUEST - then they are a guest, they don't pay admission and they don't pay to dance, buy a garter, participate in a raffle, etc.

Sorry about the vent.  I'll try to refrain in the future.

kelseyk23

The dollar dance is a tradition that many couples partake in around my home but I don't like the idea of it so I didn't know if there were any alternatives that anyone had done to the dollar dance.

MyNameIsNot

Asking your guests for money is rude in any form, including a dollar dance.  Just skip it.

If your guests want to give you money, they will put it in the card box.  Asking for more money is just crass.

Pirata13

Dollar dances are popular in Western Pa. too, and back in the day, my mom & dad were one of the first NOT to do one because my mom didn't want to. All you have to do is not do one, and not have anything in it's place.  If people ask, you can simply state that you & FI didn't want to do one. We aren't doing one either, as I don't feel right doing something that is basically asking for more than my guests have already done.  Remember, just because it's common doesn't mean it isn't tacky or that you have to do it.

anna.oskar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_alternative-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:9cdf9639-36b3-4198-9ca5-e42f2aa1f7bdPost:3a33ff17-63e9-4843-a912-223013b6ffc5">Alternative to Dollar Dance?</a>:
[QUOTE]Does anyone have any suggestions for another way to get donations from guests?
Posted by kelseyk23[/QUOTE]

I hate to break it to you, but your wedding is NOT a fund-raising event.

duckie1905

Your wedding isn't a fundraiser.  Don't ask your guests to cough up more money than I'm sure they already have just to attend and buy you presents.

I find it funny that you are a-okay with soliciting donations from your guests but you don't like the way the dollar dance stops the flow of the reception.  Sounds backwards to me, somehow.

Jazzy_belle

I'm not sure why you want donations from your guests.  It is rather tacky.

Brie2010

As a general rule, one should always avoid dancing for money.

Also, the purpose of a reception is to thank guests for attending your wedding.  Not for them to give you "donations."  Don't be a greedy hosebag.

RachNRich

Your wedding isn't a light-the-night walk for leukemia, therefor you are not allowed to ask for donations.

Weddings do not equal fundraisers.

lpstl

I can understand honoring a tradition.

But, you don't seem concerned with the tradition, you seem concerned with getting money. That's tacky no matter how you cut it.

Brie2010

I'd also like to add that selling your underthings is generally never a good thing to do.

anna.oskar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_alternative-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:9cdf9639-36b3-4198-9ca5-e42f2aa1f7bdPost:1c1f5959-1325-42b9-ba10-0bf16d637cbd">Re: Alternative to Dollar Dance?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'd also like to add that selling your underthings is generally never a good thing to do.
Posted by Brie2010[/QUOTE]

but if some perv wanted to buy your panties for $1000., would you do it?

Night_Sprite

Anna, don't talk about how you purchased my undies.

anna.oskar

but they were Rainbow Brite!!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Love it Brie.

You could always just have bouncers make them open their wallets and the door and collect the large bills. Or maybe pass a collection plate at church. That will work really well, especially if it's a traditional ceremony. Do it right before or right after communion.

mocha beans

I'm just going to reiterate that weddings are not fund raising events to bleed your guests dry.  They already bought you a gift, presumably, and showed up, what more do you want?

[Deleted User]

Could you somehow make a credit card machine that is attached to the lock of the door to the reception hall? That way, they would have to donate in order to get in.

Credit card declines and / or those total idiots that can't work the machine might still slow the reception down, though. So, nevermind.

goheels05

[QUOTE]Does anyone have any suggestions for another way to get donations from guests?
Posted by kelseyk23[/QUOTE]

Sure.  Just charge admission at the door.

janedoe1113a

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_alternative-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:9cdf9639-36b3-4198-9ca5-e42f2aa1f7bdPost:591f0414-1c43-49ea-80a8-a2ee021ae7d5">Re: Alternative to Dollar Dance?</a>:
[QUOTE]As a general rule, one should always avoid dancing for money.
Posted by Brie2010[/QUOTE]

Snort

squirrly

So, you find actually dancing with the guests who want to give you money to do so offensive, but not the taking of their money?  Wow.  I'm thankful I'm not a guest at your wedding.

Don't have a dollar dance.  Don't try to find an alternative way to get cash outta your guests.  Just socialize with them, have a good time with them, and then go enjoy your honeymoon.  On your own dime.

OFF

Let me guess you're also having a cash bar.  You could at the end of the meal present your "guests" with a bill.  You could also let people ahem "borrow" your little sis/cousin whomever for the night or by the hour.  

jamiefour

Wow, my thoughts first of all the dollar dance might be the most inappropriate thing I have ever seen in real life.  I went to a wedding over the summer where it lasted for an hour and a half.  It was obnoxious and they "made" like 250 dollars.  It made me want to take money out of my card.  I don't understand why anyone would do any of these things.  Weddings are very expensive to attend.  (Dress, gift,maybe hotel, shower etc..)  To ask for more money is crazy.  IMO.

janedoe1113a

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_alternative-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:9cdf9639-36b3-4198-9ca5-e42f2aa1f7bdPost:6213ba40-9b0a-49eb-ad3d-e216c8ff9f07">Re: Alternative to Dollar Dance?</a>:
[QUOTE]Dress, gift,maybe hotel, shower etc..
Posted by jamiefour[/QUOTE]

I read this and my first thought was wondering where you live that you have to pay to take a shower.  I need some wine.  lol

jamiefour

LOL navy... I meant shower gift.  I was just trying to think of all the costs there are to go to a wedding!

nda_roxybabe

Why do you need donations from your guest? Can't you afford your own wedding?

ReannaL

Maybe instead of a money dance title it different like honeymoon dance and like in the greek culture we have the bride in the center and the men throw the money all over her as for blessings.

handfast4me

As a general rule, one should always avoid dancing for money.

Hmmm.  I'm not sure I'd say that to Barishnikov.  LOL! 

megk8oz

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_alternative-dollar-dance?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:9cdf9639-36b3-4198-9ca5-e42f2aa1f7bdPost:3a33ff17-63e9-4843-a912-223013b6ffc5">Alternative to Dollar Dance?</a>:
[QUOTE]IDoes anyone have any suggestions for another way to get donations from guests?
Posted by kelseyk23[/QUOTE]

Donations go to charity. Unless your reception is also a benefit dinner, I don't see what you'd want "donations" for.

Now if you're just looking to take people's money but don't feel like making the sacrifice of dancing with them for a few minutes, then I would totally recommend having a cash bar, and charging extra so you and your FI can "get a cut". Then make sure you tell your guests that a beer cost $6 because you plan on keeping half, that way they're more inclined to get drunk for your monetary gain. Trust me, you can't go wrong with that.