Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Wedding Speeches

So I am thinking I don't want any speeches. My sister's (who is also my MOH) attempt at a speech at my shower was a disaster- she didn't say anything niec about me and then talked about herself. My friends were mortified and ended  up making another speech after her. 
My FBIL (best man) has a drinking problem and while he says he will keep it together for the wedding, I know he won't. I really don't want him getting up bombed and incoherent (because that's what happens to him) to make a speech. What are everyone's thoughts on this?

Re: Wedding Speeches

  • PeavyPeavy member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    I think if you don't want 'em, don't have 'em.  Somebody should say something, though, to toast the bride and groom.  Are you planning on having your parents speak?
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    If you don't want speeches and your fiance agrees, make it so.  You both need to make sure that anyone in a role which might usually have a speaking part (give toast, speech, whatever) knows that they are to keep their lips zipped.  You'll likely need to tell them two or three times before the wedding day and, for good measure, just before the ceremony. 

    Good luck!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_wedding-speeches?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:ae1fcc1a-a5a2-4c01-b76f-b985eccdbc31Post:9bbc5926-ad34-4d42-902d-9918db089dff">Wedding Speeches</a>:
    [QUOTE]So I am thinking I don't want any speeches. My sister's (who is also my MOH) attempt at a speech at my shower was a disaster- she didn't say anything niec about me and then talked about herself. My friends were mortified and ended  up making another speech after her.  My FBIL (best man) has a drinking problem and while he says he will keep it together for the wedding, I know he won't. I really don't want him getting up bombed and incoherent (because that's what happens to him) to make a speech. What are everyone's thoughts on this?
    Posted by MsRo1976[/QUOTE]

    Tell the band leader or DJ exactly who may take the mike at the wedding.

    Traditional:  FOB welcomes their guests
                       Best man toasts the couple
                       Groom toasts his bride


    More current, I have seen the MOHs do toasts as well as FOG. 

    Really, the hosts should be making the toast other than the BM and I think the MOH is okay.

    NO ONE gets the mike after a couple if drinks. That can be a disaster you can prevent.
  • If someone like the Best Man really wants to do a speech and you don't want it at the wedding, maybe you can suggest that they give it at the rehearsal dinner instead, where the crowd will probably be smaller and there might be less opportunity to get drunk.
  • Great question I hadn't thought of! I am sure my FI best man who is great and known him for a long time will give a toast and my Mom is my MOH and MIGHT get up and say something if only just to thank everyone for coming..hmm...gonna have to go over this with FI later

    Cheryl (25) Andy (24) Newlyweds as of 8-17-12 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker pregnancy week by week
  • Thanks for the suggestions- I think I am going to ask my FI and suggest that we make the speech thanking everyone for sharing such a special day with us. My mother wants to make a speech, but I am still not so sure about that. 
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