last name

rebeccahyannis

Hi ladies -
My FI comes from a very old school family - where when you get married you drop your middle name and move your maiden name to your middle name and take his last name. my problem with this is i have three older brothers and my mom had my name (first and middle) picked out for her first pregnancy and my mother passed away in 1995 so I feel like my name is something that meant a lot to her and dont want to change it. which FI is ok with but just curious if people still do this?

bethsmiles

My first and middle name is the same as my aunts, as well as my grandmothers. My last name is very common. So Im not going to drop my middle name because its important to me. Im just going to change my last name. This is a personal decision and no one else should get to dictate what you do except for you.

amwilli5

The rules on this aren't hard and fast as some may think.  Some grooms are actually taking the brides last name instead of vice versa.  I will be taking my FH last name and losing mine altogether because well everyone on the planet has it and it's not important to me what so ever.  Some people hyphenate or don't take the FH last name at all because they have already established themselves in the professional world with maiden name.  You could hyphenate your last names, or have 2 middle names, only you can decide what you would like.  

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

I'm just keeping all three of my names.

What do YOU want to do? That's all that matters. Not his family.

MyNameIsNot

It's your name and it's your decision.  It doesn't matter what your FI's family or your family or anyone else thinks.  Do what is comfortable for you.

It is common to keep your name as is, to change your middle to your maiden and add his name, to keep the three you have and add a fourth, to add his name and hyphenate, to drop your maiden and add his.  Some other people decide to do non-traditional things, like both H&W hyphenate or change to a new name or a blended name.

Whatever you decide to do is fine, as long as you are happy with it.  No one else's opinion matters.  

rebeccahyannis

thanks ladies - I feel better about keeping my middle name, dropping my maiden name and taking his last name. sometimes you just need a little back up to make you feel right about your decision.

heather_shadow

Agreed. Seems for you two middle names is a great solution!