How to include my cousin

lfritos

I have a large wedding pary (6 on each side) including my sisters, my brother, fi's sister, and a few close friends. Including family is important. I am very close with my cousins, they are practically siblings. I want to include the male cousins as ushers, but I have one female cousin that is 13 years old, and I can't figure out the best way to include her. I don't want to do the junior bridesmaid thing, because the wp is big enough as is and i don't want her to be more included than her brother. It has been suggested that she man the guest book, but I think a 13 year old would not enjoy it... so any ideas?aside: we are including fi's cousin as a flower girl, and his male cousin as an usher as well

bablingbrooke

Could she do a reading? Bring up the gifts for a nuptial mass? She could also be an usher w/ her brother/cousins--no one says ushers must be male!

megk8oz

Regarding guest book attendant: no, no, and God, please: no. Nobody likes that job, it's not an "age" thing, its a "Who wants to 'work' at somebody's wedding?" thing. If FI's cousin gets to be a FG and her brother is an usher, I really don't see why your cousin can't be a BM if her brother is an usher. Otherwise, I suggest having her do a reading or if there's mass have her bring up gifts.

mikesboo23

She could hand out programs if she wants to.  She'd just get to stand at the entrance looking cute.

duckie1905

Do not give her a crap job like watching the guestbook or handing out programs.  Your guests know to sign the book and pick up a program if they want one.  These "jobs" are not honors, they are busywork.Have her do a reading or if you really are close to her add her as a jr BM because I can't really see how it would make that big a difference.Don't make her your PA either.Other than a reading I don't have any ideas.  Being a guest is an honor too.  Don't give her something to do just to include her.  Either have something special and meaningful for her or just invite her as a guest.

leeshab1982

I have the same cousin situation, except my cousin is 10 years older than I am.  She's going to be an usher (if there's a word for the female version, I don't know it, sorry!).  We talked and she's really excited about it.  I think a 13 year old would be able to handle it, as well.  It's nothing too difficult.  I'm sure she'll be happy that you're including her. 

cherryT87

I have a similar issue with FGS older sisters. The FGs are twins and they are the youngest in their house hold and the family so the older girls sometimes feel left out and jealous . My FMIL also had the same concerns since we feel they are to young to be JR BMs. I know most Brides say not to this but the oldest girl is artistic and Fi and I decided to make them "greeters and ushers" as the guest enter the building and sign the book they will ask if its ok to take some pictures of them and help them to their seats. FMIL really liked this and so did the girls. FMIL said the girls want to make us an album out of the pictures they take. (before and after the ceremony and during the reception) I thought that was cute and nice of them to think of something like that,besides I think letting them take pics also allows us to see our wedding through a child/tweens and just a quests eyes. but thats just us. they love to take pictures and video record stuff, so we used what they like to make a lame boring job fun and exciting.

LarissaAnn

Cherry, you're actually making them ushers, and usher=honor, not job. So that's cool. The fact that they'll be taking photos of guests and making you an album from them is just icing if they feel like they get to make you something special that's just from them.

lfritos

Thanks everyone! I'll definetely talk to her and her mom so see what she might like to do, if anything.