MOH vent!

andreamarie77

I love my best friend. Really I do. That's why I asked her to be my MOH. But lately she's getting on my last nerve!

The latest: she texted me today to ask if I wanted to do a "pre-wedding jitters wine party" at a wine club in our city. Sure, since I didn't get to enjoy my bachelorette party (I got sick and couldn't leave the hotel), this sounds great! But I tell her that I want to do it this weekend so others can come and have time to plan.

Her response? "What, I'm not good enough to hang out with alone? But fine, if that's what you want to do."

So she then tells me she'll have to invite a girl that she's not particularly fond of (we'll call her H) because I invited her to the wedding. Yes, I say, I'm aware of that. You're gonna have to deal with her at the wedding, so you might as well just do it.

Then she wants to know what table I have H sitting at. What does she care? She'll be at the head table anyway!! So I tell her "I put her with people she knows" - and then I get a text back saying "why won't you tell me? why are you being vague? what's your deal?"

OMG. I'm at work. I'm covering my job and my co-worker's, who is on vacation. I don't have time to look up where H is sitting and who she is sitting with! Don't freak out about it!!

Last nerve. Seriously.

TiffannieF

Just to clarify you are venting correct?  Not asking a question....

IMHO, I think your MOH does sound like she is being a drama queen.  But at the same time I think you are being a little sensitive.  Maybe the wine thing was just suppose to be you and her.  I don't see why H has to be invited...not every woman invited to the wedding has to be invited to prewedding parties.  Where H sits really is none of her business...my response to her would have been "Dude, seriously chillax.  You are not sitting together so there is no reason why you should care."  I would ignore any retort after that.

andreamarie77

Yep Tiffannie, I was just venting

I'm sure I'm blowing this way out of proportion, and I know that, but I'm just stressed. I'm down to 10 more days and everything is just being thrown at me from everyone!! So when she pitched her little fit about where H was sitting, I just was over it. I need to breathe and have some of that wine!

TiffannieF

lol...oh boy 10 days....I understand, lol. 

sonya+adam

Hmph. Yeah, she had a right to be upset that you wanted to invite other people. She didn't say "Hey, let's have a get together with a bunch of girls!". She obviously meant that she wanted to have a wine night with just the two of you. It should have tipped you off when she sent the text claiming to not be good enough. You should have responded with something like "Oh, I didn't realize you meant just us! No worries!". It wasn't your place to invite other people to something you weren't planning without at least asking. It sounds like you just told her/assumed you could. (Sorry, that's one of my biggest pet peeves) Also, she shouldn't have to invite this girl that she doesn't like just because she's invited to the wedding. It's not really a "pre-wedding event", it's more like a girl's night, that she is planning, not you. If I was planning something, I sure as heck would not want to invite a girl that I didn't even like.

Now, the second part of the vent, I agree with you. It's really none of her business where this girl sits. She doesn't have to deal with her at the wedding, she can just spot her and avoid her. NBD. She shouldn't be bothering you at work about that kind of stuff. But you should also let her know, politely, "Sorry, I don't have a deal or anything, I'm just super swamped at work. Is it okay if I chat with you later?".

caterpillar85

IMO when I hear the term "party" I don't think of just two people sipping wine, and I think technically for it to be a party there needs to be at least 4 people. If that is the word she said then her getting uber upset for you not knowing what she meant was a little uncalled for.
Just call her or something and say "sorry, I'm overly stressed since I have less than 2 weeks left and I didn't mean to make you upset." Personally I think trying to spare her feelings at a time like this is ridiculous and she should already know how stressed you are and can't sit there and fiddle with petty things like where a girl is sitting... but she is your BFF and you don't want to piss her off before she stands next to you so just oblige her.

frogger6673

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_moh-vent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:cdf06d2e-905c-4238-8ef1-f3f738990180Post:f87a6337-3642-4e02-ac7d-7bcdacbb27b1">Re: MOH vent!</a>:
[QUOTE]Hmph. Yeah, she had a right to be upset that you wanted to invite other people. She didn't say "Hey, let's have a get together with a bunch of girls!". She obviously meant that she wanted to have a wine night with just the two of you. It should have tipped you off when she sent the text claiming to not be good enough. You should have responded with something like "Oh, I didn't realize you meant just us! No worries!". It wasn't your place to invite other people to something you weren't planning without at least asking. It sounds like you just told her/assumed you could. (Sorry, that's one of my biggest pet peeves) Also, she shouldn't have to invite this girl that she doesn't like just because she's invited to the wedding. It's not really a "pre-wedding event", it's more like a girl's night, that she is planning, not you. If I was planning something, I sure as heck would not want to invite a girl that I didn't even like.

Now, the second part of the vent, I agree with you. It's really none of her business where this girl sits. She doesn't have to deal with her at the wedding, she can just spot her and avoid her. NBD. She shouldn't be bothering you at work about that kind of stuff. But you should also let her know, politely, "Sorry, I don't have a deal or anything, I'm just super swamped at work. Is it okay if I chat with you later?".
Posted by sonya+adam[/QUOTE]

This.  100% 

Meghannsix

10 days to go!  I'm having my own little wine party in your honor, good luck girl