What to wear to an orthodox wedding?

JoBell123

One of FI's friends is getting married this August in an orthodox ceremony up in Toronto.  It's on a Sunday, so I'm assuming it's a daytime wedding.  I've never been to an orthodox wedding, so I'm just curious what would be appropriate to wear?

artisticjewishbride2013

Do not assume it is  a day wedding becouse it is a Mitvah to get married under the stars and a god portion of jewish weddings are at dusk.  In an Orthedox wedding , the day is a personal Yom Kipper ( day of atonement) for the couple where they create a new being and all the sins of the past are erased.  The Jewish calander and the rest of the worlds calander is different which sometimes is a blessing in disguise.

As to what to wear a few guidelines
from the collar bone to 2 inchs past the knee must be covered
arms must be covered down to 2 inchs past the elbow ( 3/4 sleeves)
women should not dress like men so no pants
If your married hair should be covered- I love hats personally sadl im not married yet

jessicabessica

You should dress modestly, but there can be a lot of variation in the ways that Orthodox women dress, so I would try to get a little more info about where it will be and how traditional the friends are. 

I would probably wear a skirt below the knee and a three-quarter length shirt, or maybe a dress that's below the knee and a cardigan.  Definitely something lightweight so I wouldn't be uncomfortable keeping the cardigan on if it was warm weather. 

I don't know how others feel about this, but I am not Orthodox, and I am not going to cover my hair once I'm married in day-to-day or in shul.  I don't think that I would do it to go to an Orthodox wedding. 

JoBell123

Thanks.  My FI barely knows what time WE'LL be married, so he has no idea if this is a day or nighttime wedding.  I'm sure we'll get more info soon.  And I'll defeinitely ask the bride when I see her what to wear.  She's traditional but still stylish, so she'll be able to give me a better idea.  But thanks for the info on what needs to be covered.  I may do a tea length or long dress and lightweight long-sleeve or 3/4 sleeve cardigan, unless I find a dress that covers me up.  There's a few stores near me that cater to the orthodox community, so I'll poke my head in there.

I'll be about 2 months out from my wedding, so I don't need to cover my hair.

smilygrl17

My friend joked for her wedding, Sleeves no Cleave. 3/4 sleeves, skirt down to your knee. Depending how modern the families are, you may be able to wear something a little below your collarbone or may need to be covered up.
I mentioned this another time on a post, a lot of people do a dress with a shirt (onesie, yes a onesie-with sleeves) underneath. I know some people mentioned that they didn't like that look.
Where in NJ are you? Lakewood and Highland Park, as well as Teaneck and Fairlawn area, may have stores that you would be able to find something.

JoBell123

I was thinking of going to Teaneck.  But a shirt under a dress could work too.

smilygrl17

If you're going to wear a shirt underneath I would recommend a onesie only because then you don't have to deal with the line of your shirt showing or having to keep pulling down your shirt. If you look at my picture, I'm wearing a onesie (snapped at the bottom just like a baby onesie!) underneath my pink shirt. Most Jewish stores carry them and I think even regular stores that have special undergarments (like spanx) have them too.

tenofcups4me

Definitely talk with the couple. I've only attended one orthodox wedding, but I didn't see anything remotely like that idea of a shirt under a dress (which I think is incredibly unattractive). I saw a lot of women very stylishly, though modestly, dressed for a black tie optional Sunday night wedding. They looked like women dressed for any other formal wedding. The bride had described herself and FI as "modern" orthodox so I don't know if that makes a difference.

I spoke with the bride before the wedding I attended and asked her what would typically be expected. She was very clear that the orthodox women would be in dresses below their knees with their arms covered, but that I should feel free to dress how I was comfortable. Still, I wanted to be respectful.

It was actually quite easy -- I wore a long black skirt (floor length) and a black velvet long-sleeve top that had a pretty high round neck.

I would think today's fashions would actually make it pretty easy to work with something already in your closet -- a maxi with a high neck and a sweater or a wrap. If it's more formal, a shift dress with a high neck and matching wrap, sweater or coat (like most of the women were wearing for the royal wedding). Or a long flowy skirt, a sleeveless top with high neck and matching sweater. I know I have plenty of things in my own closet that I could mix and match that would be perfectly appropriate.

Danaz1

I went to a very orthodox wedding recently and I just made sure my shoulders were covered and the dress went to my knees. I wore a shall to cover my arms but I took it off and it was fine. 

october010bride

I think you've received some great ideas on clothing but I just wanted to add that we have a Sunday ceremony which started in the late afternoon and went until 10 pm.... def not daytime.