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Open bar / booze at reception

SonaliPopSonaliPop member
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in South Asian Weddings
My future In-laws to be (when that happens!) don't drink. Their oldest daughter had a very simple wedding without a modern reception about ten years ago. Their youngest daughter is set to get married in India ...also in a traditional way, without a reception.

My BF and I are the more modern couple. We like the idea of having a big party to celebrate being man and wife.

I'm not sure how to bring up any drinks at the reception. I certainly do not want anybody to pay for an open bar all night because my wedding reception isn't Tao nightclub in Vegas and my family and future family members are not the rich friends who foot the bill. I also don't want a dry reception. How did you guys bring this up to your family members who don't drink? He and I both drink and both of our parents are aware of that. My parents are a lot more understanding...especially considering my Dad doesn't mind a drink here and there.
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Re: Open bar / booze at reception

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    HinajHinaj member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If they are against an open bar and don't want to pay for it, then maybe you two can pitch in for the bar tab.  Some ways to keep cost low would be to just open the bar for a couple of hours instead of all night long or just serve beer and wine and a signature drink or something.  We are not having alcohol at the wedding, so I really didn't think much on it. 

    Also, if they are uncomfortable with people drinking at the reception, then maybe your FI could talk to them and explain it to them.  I know some people reallly mind it for whatever reason, so make sure you can talk to them that it is something you two want and are willing to cover the cost for. 
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    raangoliraangoli
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    At first, my dad made it sound like he didn't want to have drinks/drinking at the reception. But we are having an open bar. It's not top shelf or premium, but nonetheless, drinks will be served. I am excited too that our venue allows us to have "signature" drinks that they will serve as welcome drinks as people arrive to the cocktail hour.

    If you don't want the open bar, Hina had some good suggestions. Or you could just have a couple signature drinks that are available throughout the night. That way there is a drink and it's not an open bar.

    The bar tab like Hina suggested could get tricky though. It all depends on how much you think people will drink and the average cost per drink. We thought about this option too, until we realized that the cost per drink (even for soda and juices, etc) were pricey, it made more sense to go with the open bar option.

    When you're close to choosing your venue, get the different price options and see what works best for you!
    ExerciseMilestone
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    SonaliPopSonaliPop member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    These are great suggestions.

    We could also pay for the booze ourselves.

    His parents will be giving some money for this wedding, mine will be, and the BF will be. He is the one who is working and who makes the dough, so, he's going to contribute as well. Maybe if our parents are not okay with paying for it or if we don't want them to, it's something we can take on.

    Some people use money from their weddings for honeymoons, others use it to pay off the rest of their wedding. Maybe this is one thing we can try to handle ourselves.
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    jnsainijnsaini
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I think Sonali it depends on your FI and the families if they are drinkers or not, if they are not the paid open bar honestly will be a waste.
    Being punjabi my fam are big on drinking and they drink good liquor at that..so we did get premium open bar for 5hrs, but nonetheless everyone is very civilized so I have no fears and FI was really excited about it so it worked out since the venue gave us one flat rate/person include liquor in the price.

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    kpwedkkkpwedkk member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If your Future in-laws don't want to drink, or don't want to be around those that drink - what about a non-alcoholic bar? or a signature drink - the last wedding we went to, their signature drink was mango lassis in margarita glasses - more folks were drinking those, than going to the bar and getting the real deal :)

    I wanted to have falooda as our signature drink, but the basil seeds hehe, they didn't go up the standard straws :D

    http://www.frewines.com/

    http://www.arielvineyards.com/index.html

    Or the sparkling apple cider.



    "The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart." ~ Miss K ~
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    SonaliPopSonaliPop member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My bf doesn't actually think they will have a problem with. They know how receptions are and they don't think or feel that alochol will mean we will be belligerent idiots. So I think just figuring out how much we are willing to spend is most important.
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