Gay Weddings

Shower for a gay bride

Hi everyone!!

I'm throwing a small, surprise bridal brunch for my best friend who is marrying her girlfriend in September.

I know it's basically the same thing as a "straight" bridal shower, just make it something she'd enjoy, but has anyone gone to any great same-sex bridal showers and has any tips? Or for you lesbian brides, anything you'd love to see and/or love to have someone avoid? I want to be sensitive to the fact that she's marrying a woman, celebrate it, but also not have to get her stuff with two brides in poofy dresses on it. That's not really her style, but it's all I can find when I look for "lesbian wedding" stuff.

I'd appreciate any thoughts, and congratulations to you all!!!

xoxo
Anna

Re: Shower for a gay bride

  • edited December 2011
    The best same-sex bridal shower I went too was for a friend of mine last year. It was made in the style of my friend (themed around broadway musicals) and everyone had a lot of fun playing games like guess that song and playing a half broadway half couple trivia game. I'm not sure in other areas where gay marriage is newly legal but in our area it is just considered part of the marriage  and who the couple are (no different than if they were both video game game nerds or if a heterosexual husband was a stay at home dad). 

    In order to give some really good advice I'd need to know more about your friend, because honestly, there is no one way of doing a bridal shower for a gay bride just as there is no one way that works for all heterosexual brides. My suggestion would be to do a search for bridal shower games, bridal shower themes or even just "how to throw a bridal shower" and pick some ideas that you think your friend and the group would like. You may have to tweak some wordings and personalize elements but basically that is all in the fun! 
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  • K&J64K&J64 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would suggest inviting her fiancée too, as she's one of the brides as well. We had a bridal shower thrown for both of us, it was very traditional though as we're very traditional girls. It was Breakfast at Tiffanys theme and was perfect for our taste. Think of something your friend really enjoys (gardening, poker, music etc) and build a theme around that. You know her well so if she likes shower games have some, if not (like us) try to avoid them. We had bridal bingo, but that was just to entertain the guest while we opened gifts, that was the end of games for us, we're more about socializing, and bellinis!

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  • edited December 2011
    I went to a bridal shower last year that was a combined shower for both my FSIL and her (now) wife. For the most part, it just felt like any other bridal shower I've been to - there were a few games, the brides opened gifts, we ate food... you get the idea. They did have a little cake with two brides on it, but other than that, you probably wouldn't have known it was a same-sex shower if no one had told you.

    Their shower didn't really have a theme, but it had all the elements of a great party that they love - friends, family, food, and, of course, a few drinks! Without knowing your friend, it's kind of hard to know what she'd like and dislike - maybe think back to other parties you or other friends have thrown for her birthdays and other events. That might give you a good starting point as to what elements she may like for a bridal shower. HTH!

  • goawaypleasegoawayplease member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Unless you're looking for rainbow flags, I'd avoid looking up "lesbian bridal showers". It's just a party for your friend. If she's into classy or simple or fun, go with that.

    I think the only thing that changes is that you'd invite her fiancée. My fiancé had a separate man-date with his friends at a BBQ place during my brunch with friends 'cause he thought it'd be awkward to hang out at my shower, but I can see how leaving out her future wife would be just as awkward, in reverse...

    Also, if you want to avoid two brides on a cake, get two cute figurines. My sister and her husband had Brainy Smurf and Smurfette on their cake.
  • edited December 2011
    This might be a cute idea for you.  I am throwing a Frog Prince bridal shower for my BFF and I found the most wonderful products at a site called The Rosemary Company.  They have the cutest frog prince centerpiece that also doubles as a stand for the bridal shower favors.  I love the fact that they also show some recipes and have frog prince games.  I'm doing up my own invitations, but they have frog prince invitations and thank you cards too.  I am soo glad I found this site

      http://www.rosemarycompany.com/frog-prince-bridal-shower.html 

      I think it's a great theme and might work well for you because many of the items show two frogs, one with a crown and one without.  Just a thought.
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