Christian Weddings

DH has a question for you all...the topic is babies

DH and I aren't looking at having kids until I'm done with my BA and he's fine with that but he is very excited to know that one day he will be a father. He's would like to know if any of your FIs or DHs are just as excited for fatherhood even though it might be a few year from happening.
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Re: DH has a question for you all...the topic is babies

  • edited December 2011
    I'm probably not a good one to talk about having children. my FI is horrible with children. When I was babysitting my 6 month old nephew, I handed the baby to FI for a second so I could go do something in the kitchen, and when I came back, FI was still holding the baby at arms length just staring at him. It was so funny. 

    For reason I'd rather not talk about again, FI is getting a vasectomy as soon as he can after we get married (he'd do it before, but he wants to make sure that I don't back out on him!). It was so funny, when FMIL heard about this, the look she gave me was priceless, it said, "First you're taking my baby away from me, NOW you're taking my grandbabies away from me.... how dare you...." It was great because FMIL and I get along really well.   

    We might eventually adopt children though. We're not totally against kids, but We don't see why, when there are so many orphans and children without families in this world, that we need to go and make our own babies, why not just get some of those kids!

    that's just my 2 cents. 
  • edited December 2011
    My FI (soon to be DH!!!!!) is excited about one day having little rugrats to call our own.  We want maybe 2 children ... not more than that though ... for the expense and the time to spend with them.  He looked at me a few months ago, and reminded me of what he said when he proposed - he wanted me to be the future mother of his children, la la la, all that stuff.  I'll never forget it.  We are at least 3 or 4 years away from trying to even get pregnant, if not longer ... so, the excitement is contained, but it's definitely there.  I'd say moreso with him than with me right now.  
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  • edited December 2011
    I think he is, but not quite as excited as I am (I'm super baby crazy so I have to keep reminding myself that we're waiting). He's really good with his nieces and nephews and definitely wants our own but he is just so practical he has to at least get accepted into his masters program before we try. He knows I want at least 100 babies, our own and by adoption. The only requirement on his part is that we can afford them!
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  • mrandmrsbristmrandmrsbrist member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    He is! He knows it's a long way off and they might not be his naturally (we're not sure if I can conceive or not...wouldn't be surprised if the answer is no), but he's excited anyhow.
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  • GJones27GJones27 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    DH is excited, but we both agree that now is not the time.   He loves to play games with his 8-year-old cousin, and I think he's excited to have his own kids one day.
  • FaithCaitlinFaithCaitlin member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    FI is thrilled about having kids. We probably won't have kids for the next 4-5 years or so but we are both very excited. FI will be a great father and he knows it! ;)

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  • SuMmErKuTiESuMmErKuTiE member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    DH can't wait to be a father! We were actually discussing it last night during our anniversary dinner. But we've been putting off having babies until we were settled down here in FL and into our house. Plus, we have a cruise planned with friends of ours from back home that we've been looking forward to for several months, and we decided to wait until after we got back from our cruise to start trying. My prescription of BCP's runs out in September and I've decided not to refill them and see what happens. I've heard it could happen right away or it could take a while. It all depends on God's plan for us, and we're ready when He is.
  • yodacubyodacub member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    FI is very excited to have kids.  He knows we are going to wait a couple years after we're married and occasionally reminds himself of that out loud :)  He loves kids - my cousin has a 4 month old and FI keeps telling me that he likes to hold the baby and see me hold the baby which makes him think of our future kids.  He really wants a little girl and can't wait to play tea party with her. 
  • edited December 2011
    FI is really excited too.  Its so cute because when we met he always said he didn't want to have kids any time soon and now everytime we see my neice he says "I can't wait til we have one of our own!"  We've talked about starting to try right after the wedding since the women in my family have a harder time getting pregnant as they get older.  If we can't concieve though(and probably even if we can) we're looking to adopt/be foster parents.  
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  • edited December 2011
    FI is really excited to be a father.  Whenever he sees kids, he lights up and plays with them.  It's so cute.
  • aggiebugaggiebug member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    H is excited about the thought of being a dad, but he is the reason we are waiting.   I love watching him with my niece and nephews, he is just adorable with the kids.  While I think it is a good idea to wait I have major baby fever and wouldn't mind starting earlier.  He knows this and at some points I think he is scared I would undermine our family planning! (which I would never do!) He is cute about it though.

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  • edited December 2011
    My fiance talks about when we have kids all of the time, but he is scared of it too.  He's not big on change so it does freak him out a bit.  Right now he's kind of crazy since we are buying a house and the wedding is getting closer. 
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  • edited December 2011
    FI is willing to be a dad, and wants to be a good one, but I don't think he's excited, per se.  When we met, FI didn't want any kids and I wanted 2.  As we became more serious, FI said he wanted to have just 1.  Now he is starting to warm to the idea of having 2 - and ironically I'm warming to the idea of just 1!  Kids are so very far off in our future though.  He'll probably be excited when we get there, but he's not really excited right now.

    I asked him what he thought would be a good age to start having babies, and he said 28, which actually surprised me since I'm thinking more like 30.  I think our general plan is to stay on BCP until our 5 year wedding anniversary (which would make us both 28), then throw out the pills and see what happens.  If we aren't pregnant by the 6th anniversary, we'll probably see a specialist.
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  • edited December 2011
    My FI is more excited about becoming a parent than I am and it's utterly adorable. I'm excited too, don't get me wrong, but he brings it up all the time.

    Something that gets in the way of my "over the top" excitement is the fact that I'm not the biggest fan of doctors or hospitals, and needles scare me to death. Seriously. I won't be getting an epidural but I won't even like the IV...

    I do want to be a mother though, and I've considered adoption. I'm really torn though because I do want kids who resemble their parents, and I know FI really does. Then there's the aforementioned irrational fears.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_christian-weddings_dh-question-allthe-topic-babies?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:464687ae-7bc1-4360-9aea-999e11f1e1adDiscussion:869956e4-002c-48d4-b703-aadf3b78bb5cPost:f867393f-431b-4542-a045-7c2acd281914">Re: DH has a question for you all...the topic is babies</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think he is, but not quite as excited as I am (<strong>I'm super baby crazy</strong> so I have to keep reminding myself that we're waiting). He's really good with his nieces and nephews and definitely wants our own but he is just so practical he has to at least get accepted into his masters program before we try. He knows <strong>I want at least 100 babies</strong>, our own and by adoption. The only requirement on his part is that we can afford them!
    Posted by Special2011[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Haha, me too!! If money were not a factor, I'd want like 8. But since money is a factor, I want 4. FI wants 2.. I'm trying to talk him into AT LEAST 3. We'll see. But FI def is excited about having kids! We are both teachers, so we love kids! I want to have them asap after the wedding, FI wants to wait a year at least.. so we will see! </div>
  • faith415faith415 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    FI loves kids and will make a wonderful father. He has a 3 year old niece that he spends a lot of time around and always says that he doesn't want our children to be too much younger than his sisters. I absolutely adore kids, which is no surprise since I'm studying early childhood education, and want at least 4. Although FI was the one who even made the final decision on when he wanted us to start trying I wouldn't say he's excited yet. He always says that when it actually happens he knows he'll be excited, but until then it's more abstract to him. He was the same with getting engaged/married though as well.
  • Purple&7Purple&7 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My FI says he doesn't want kids but he'll make cute little remarks like "when we have kids". I want kids and he knows it. He knows that eventually it will happen and when it does I know that he will make a great dad! He is so great around kids.
  • DramaGeekDramaGeek member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Neither of us want kids, and if one of us had wanted kids we would have never gotten married.  We have also agreed that if one of us changes our minds we are free to voice it but that we would not have children unless we both change our minds.

    Oddly, H would be the better parent while I am probably the one who would be more easily persuaded to have kids.  I would be a terrible mother, and I know that, so we won't be having kids.  We are awesome at being aunt and uncle though!

    Oh, and I cannot imagine what H's reaction would be if something happened and I did get pregnant.  It'd probably start with shock and morph into terror.
  • edited December 2011
    My FI will be excited to have a child. He knows he wants to be a dad, and is excited about the fact that he will be one some day.  Right now he is TERRIFIED of having a child, I think it's the fact that we will be completely responsible for a tiny little human who needs us to give him everything.
    Plus, I have to finish my BS before we start trying which will be in a year and a half.
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  • edited December 2011
    Neither of us wants kinds, though DH is only 90% certain of this.  He is a pediatrician, so he actually sees kids every day and is very good with them.  I'm horrible with kids; I got put on baby-sitting duty for 30 minutes one day at a wedding rehearsal, and half way into that the mothers came back b/c I had no idea what to do other than try to stick the pacifier back in the kids' mouths and rock the carrier thingy when they started crying. 

    If I ever got pregnant, DH would most likely be the one to stay at home.  He's actually said he wouldn't mind being a stay at home dad, but we've discussed the fact that it would drive me bonkers.
  • fpaemp2011fpaemp2011 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    We're both really excited for kids.  We're planning on at least 4, maybe more, and starting TTC in a year.  If God has plans for us to be parents sooner, I'll be thrilled.  DH has said that he'll probably have a little freak-out moment, but he'll be excited whenever it happens.
  • edited December 2011
    FI wants kids just as much as I do. We LOVE kids. He is so amazing with our niece and nephew that I know he will be 1000x better with our kids. We do not want to have kids until I am done with my BA and maybe masters and then he will be in seminary and I will be the sole provider so not anytime so, but when they do start arriving they will arrive fast and often. We want 4 or 6! Right now we have decided to not say the "c" word (children) in our house when we get married in fear we will get pregnant!! And seeing my niece and nephew be born is enough for me to strictly take my BC for several more years :)
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