Wedding Woes

The Brothers Grim

My FI & I had decided that his younger sister would be the only one in the wedding party. Well, I have 2 brothers and he has 1. 

(a little back story) My FI's brother doesn't really like me. From the very begining of our relationship has stated multiple times that I am only set out to ruin my Fi's life. That all I want to do is tie him down (no pun intended) and ruin his college years amongst other things. Almost everytime I see my FBIL he insults me and then pretends to be sorry. There has been less in the last few months but nonetheless the words he has said to me have been very hurtful. 

My FI's brother called my FMIL complaining that he was not a GM let alone Best Man. My FMIL sat us down last night & stated that we we're not being quite fair with him. As I spoke with my brothers this moring they asked how things for the wedding going & I said well but that we kinda had a complaint that my FI's brother because was not in the WP so we added him and friend that I had been wanting to add anyways. Right away both of them let me know how upset that they we're not in the WP. 

I never wanted my FI to feel forced to  have my brothers in the WP & I thought that if we left out all the brothers none of them could complain he's this & I am not. 

So now what?  Do I stick to my guns & say no brothers ir do I enter all 3 in the WP? 

I honestly don't know what to do. 

Thanks Ladies.

-L
Holiday

Re: The Brothers Grim

  • ReturnOfKuusReturnOfKuus member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    I think you should postpone until both of you are out of college.
    image
  • TheDuckisTheDuckis member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would have told FBIL that the wedding party is meant to be made up of people who are supportive of the relationship and the marriage, and that since he's obviously not, he will not be included. But since you already caved, there's nothing you can do.

    So I agree with Kuus, but I think you should postpone not just until you're out of college, but until you're capable of making decisions about things like who's in the wedding party without being brow-beaten into changing your mind.
  • ~~Busy.~~~~Busy.~~ member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    why is his family more important that yours?

    I too agree you should wait until you are out of college and this is coming from a girl who married her high school sweetheart.
  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm going to agree with everyone else - you need to postpone getting married until you have completed college,  you both have full-time jobs, and you are capable of making decisions more difficult than "who will be in the WP?".

    Learn some basic life skills and come back and talk to us in a few years.
  • edited December 2011
    I agree with the others, and want to know why your FI doesn't say/do anything when his brother says rude things to/about you?
    image
  • InksWellInksWell member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Hold out till after college. That'll show FBIL who's trying to sabatoge your FI's college career.

    additional question to be taken to another post.

    Dear Rain, Not Today. Sincerely, My Parade
  • lucy2113lucy2113 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We have not told my FBIL yet. My FI has & does defend me. But that does not stop his brother from saying the things that he says. The only reason I am concerned about this is that I do not want him in the WP. I do not feel guilted either. I just did not know what to do for a moment. So I came to you ladies for advice. Thanks either way. I think I know what to do.

    -L

    For the record, he's my High School Sweetheart too.Kiss
    Holiday
  • baconsmombaconsmom member
    5 Love Its First Answer First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Why couldn't you have your brothers in YOUR WP? Men don't have to stand on the groom's side just because they have c0cks, you know.

    But yes, wait till you're a grownup. 
    image
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