Anniversary-jacking

TheMrsC23

Dear Prudence,
My husband and I were married last May 11. My new brother-in-law is now engaged, and we are thrilled, although we do not know his fiancée very well. They have picked dates for both their engagement party and their wedding: May 11 this year and next year. My husband and I were taken aback that they picked our wedding date. I know we don't have rights to it, but when my brother-in-law sent us an email regarding the dates, he did not even mention that it had been our wedding date, and he was my husband’s best man, so he should know. My husband sent him an email back that it probably wasn't the best date but we would make it work if nothing else could be considered. There is no indication my brother-in-law is looking to change the dates. My husband and I are confused as to what we should do. We know an engagement party can be skipped, and we will skip it because it's our first wedding anniversary. But skipping a wedding is a different story. What would you do?

—Miffed

ReturnOfKuus

Her BIL doesn't remember her wedding date.  Of course he doesn't.  Who in the hell thinks the date of when they were in someone else's wedding is memorable?!

6fsn

The wedding is on a Thursday then?

GBCK

they obviously should have given the groomsmen monogrammed shotglasses w/ the date on them.

PMeg819

I knew you'd finally write a letter about what you did MrsConn.

TheMrsC23

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_anniversary-jacking?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:95b609fd-aab0-4e1d-bf5a-0a2c39e5b5c5Post:05caeb22-e1db-47a0-8d6f-20b149184ee2">Re: Anniversary-jacking</a>:
[QUOTE]I knew you'd finally write a letter about what you did MrsConn.
Posted by PMeg819[/QUOTE]

Hee!!  I did think of you when I posted this. 

And really, you jacked my date.  Don't get it twisted.

Wzz

i do believe people remember these dates, because even if *I* didn't remember the exact date, i'd know the time around when the wedding was.

it's weird they'd land on may 11 twice, though, and not think back to someone's may wedding. it's also weird that the OP wrote into prudie instead of syaing to the sibling, hey did oyu know that is my anniversary! what a coincidence!

lizybeff

I had the same thing happen to me recently.  I calmly explained how my feelings were hurt and how I felt that I was being copied - and they changed their date. Unless there's a sentimental meaning to that day specifically, there's no reason it had to be that day.  To be honest, it is quite odd that they would want to get married on the same day that you did.  Does the bride know this?  Because she may be embarrassed to copy you.  Also, May 11th 2014 is a Sunday, correct?  If speaking up isn't your style, you could always make a quick appearance at the wedding.