In-law's don't want to add to the guest list!

bebopbarr

My future in-laws don't want to invite anyone to our wedding!  Yes, we are having a "destination" wedding, but we live in San Diego, and we're getting married 4.5 hrs away in Vegas.  Is it just me or is it F-ing weird that they don't want to invite any of their friends to the wedding??!!

lisarose7

Did they say WHY?  They might be thinking that there's no point inviting people who might not want to travel or won't be able to go.  I have to keep reminding my FI that you don't invite the people you think WILL go, you invite the people you'd LIKE to go.

TheDuckis

It sounds to me like they're ashamed of the marriage. That might be something you and your FI want to discuss before you move forward. If their opinion doesn't matter, then the lack of guests shouldn't matter either.

Heffalump

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_laws-dont-want-add-guest-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:c512882f-b04f-4c38-acd9-825207ee2b1bPost:ad96da04-13d4-4ee2-9ed4-e558ee4fedb2">In-law's don't want to add to the guest list!</a>:
[QUOTE]My future in-laws don't want to invite anyone to our wedding!  Yes, we are having a "destination" wedding, but we live in San Diego, and we're getting married 4.5 hrs away in Vegas.  Is it just me or is it F-ing weird that they don't want to invite any of their friends to the wedding??!!
Posted by bebopbarr[/QUOTE]

Who TF invites their friends to their kid's DW 4-1/2 hrs away?  Do you really think their friends are that into you?  If it were just down the street, maybe they'd stop in for a drink or something at some point, but San Diego to Vegas?  Get over yourself.

LnR70707

Probably because most people think DWs suck.  HTH!

GBCK

I think it's weird when people DO invite their friends to their kid's wedding...
if you or FI have a reationship w/ these people, they'd be on YOUR invite list, right?

Inviting oodles of people who are friends of the parents...when the parents aren't hosting, etc, is just strange...why would you want 30 strangers there?
(and it often looks like a gift grab)

bebopbarr

First of all, if you're just going to be mean, why even respond?!  "Get over myself"....nice, real nice!

Any way, my FI & I have been together for 9 years, so the future in-laws aren't ashamed of the relationship, both families love us.  My FI's side of the family is a bit strange, and I've known this for quite a while.  I just found it strange that they didn't want to invite anyone to the wedding, especially since they had an engagement party for us and DID invite their friends to that....so if they were at the engagement party, why wouldn't they be invited to the wedding?!

I just want to add that the reason why we're having it in Vegas is because ,  I'm from Pennsylvania, he's from San Diego, and now we both live in San Diego...and Vegas was more convenient for my FI's side of the family & his friends to get to Vegas, than to come to  Pennsylvania. Not to mention that we've been taking an annual vacay to Vegas for the last 8 years and we love it there.

When I started the guest list, I immediately added my mom's close group of friends to the list, not only because they are my mom's friends, but because I've grown up with them coming to family functions all my life, and could see my wedding without them there.  All of them, including my own family and friends from back home , immediately responded with YES's saying that they would be more than happy to come to Vegas for the wedding, in fact most are making a vacay out of it and coming for a whole week! 

It's just going to be sad that there are 50+ people there for me and only like 10 there for him.  I know it doesn't bother my FI, it just makes me a little sad. 

Paulo's Menina Bela

What's stopping your FI from inviting old, families friends himself? I'd be more concerned if his family refused to go the wedding for reasons other than the inconveniences of DW's.

Basinskic

Maybe they assume their friends can not attend, or won't due to the distance...  and they don't want people thinking they are fishing for more presents.

felicia220

I don't really understand why she wouldn't invite just because she thinks they won't come.  My FMIL is inviting like 15 people she knows won't come but she said she thinks they would be offended if they weren't a least given an invite.  We didn't really have a number that we had to stick to so I don't care how many people she invites.  I just find it funny how different people think.  Here is your FMIL not wanting to invite people, probably because they won't make the travel.  Its so confusing to me.  Also, maybe it is just where I am from or my circle of people, but everyone invites their friends to their children's wedding.  Probably about 75% of my parents 160 pp list are friends and I know every one of them, so I just don't think it is that weird.  Anyway, why don't you either just ask her why she isn't inviting them or have your FI just invite them? What does he think about it?

fishgirl77

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_laws-dont-want-add-guest-list?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:c512882f-b04f-4c38-acd9-825207ee2b1bPost:cd8f513e-5de2-4bc8-9fbc-f46e69e6891a">Re: In-law's don't want to add to the guest list!</a>:
[QUOTE] It's just going to be sad that there are 50+ people there for me and only like 10 there for him.  I know it doesn't bother my FI, it just makes me a little sad. 
Posted by bebopbarr[/QUOTE]

If it doesn't bother your FI, why does it bother you?  The guest count isn't a contest or some sort of direct reflection on who is more loved.  Not every one interacts with their friends in the same way, so I find nothing weird about his parents' friends not wanting to spend their vacation attending his wedding.