Reception after Destination Wedding Help!!!

bribri54

We are getting married out of town and then having a reception when we return. Are there any suggestions as far as "dos" and "don'ts" for receptions that occur a few weeks after the actual wedding?

laurening

Don't re-enact the wedding. It comes off as a production and not meaningful. I don't care for at home receptions where the couple renews their vows, the bride wears her wedding dress and has bridesmaids, etc. I see it as the bride and groom get one wedding and they had it already. The party is fine, but it's not a chance to have a wedding day do-over.

Otherwise, do have a great party. Treat your guests well with food, drinks, music.

MeaghanandMichael

Ditto pp. Do not re-enact the wedding. Don't wear your dress, exchange vows, or have attendants. You are married and it was great. In fact, my opinion is that you are already married, it is over, and you shouldn't have the party as it is just gift grabby and showy. However, the jury is still out on the etiqutte on this one (I emailed Emily Post and she never responded) so I freely admit I could be wrong. Just know that other people might see it that way as well.

MyNameIsNot

IMHO, your guestlist for both events should be the same.  The AHR should be for people that were invited to the DW but couldn't make the trip.  I don't like the idea of having a "B list" for people that you don't like enough to invite to the DW.

I like the idea of just having a great party.  If your dress is simple (like many DW dresses are) I think it's totally ok to wear it again.  Do another cake, get a DJ, have great food and drinks and dancing. 

I agree that reenacting your vows is silly, but I like when couples have some photos or a video of the ceremony available for those that missed it.

kjshea

I am doing the same thing. Do you think we should word our invitation that we are having a dinner party at the DW and a reception at home?

flutgrl1

We had a 30 person DW and then a 200+ AHR reception. I wore my dress and loved it. My BMs that couldn't make the DW were able to make their toasts.  They were dressed up. We did skip the tuxes for the guys per my DH's request. After our DW we had  a short cocktail reception, the AHR was similar except longer with stations added and a band. We did do a renewal ceremony at it (our guests all knew in advance) it was fun and was needed for my Grandmother. We did the unity candle that we couldn't do at our ceremony venue and had a friend do a reading. This arrangement was perfect for us. It was a mixture of the private ceremony then big fun celebration after I always wanted.  We sent out 2 sets of invites, one with the DW and AHR on it and announcing our vegas wedding and inviting them to the celebration.

jennymassage

I think it is ok to wear your dress so everyone that was not there can see how gorgeous you look in it!
I agree with not reinacting the wedding, but I think it is cool to have a slide show play for those that are interrested in watching it maybe off to the side. I don't think you should have a whole video of the wedding plus a slideshow of pictures and make people sit through it. They are there to celebrate with you if they want to see the wedding get together with them and show the video.
I am having a destination wedding too! Hope you have fun and have a GREAT day! Mine is in March 2011 so I have some time

mocha beans

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_reception-after-destination-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:610bd996-7420-4b90-8e4e-4464a2316e34Post:82fce042-e317-4bf4-8596-02bbd49a3e21">Re: Reception after Destination Wedding Help!!!</a>:
[QUOTE]IMHO, your guestlist for both events should be the same.  The AHR should be for people that were invited to the DW but couldn't make the trip.  I don't like the idea of having a "B list" for people that you don't like enough to invite to the DW. I like the idea of just having a great party.  If your dress is simple (like many DW dresses are) I think it's totally ok to wear it again.  Do another cake, get a DJ, have great food and drinks and dancing.  I agree that reenacting your vows is silly, but I like when couples have some photos or a video of the ceremony available for those that missed it.
Posted by MyNameIsNot[/QUOTE]

This is pretty much what we'll do.  The AHR will be for everyone, whether they made it to Hawaii or not.  I'll probably wear a cocktail dress rather than my wedding dress.  I'd like to have a scrapbook or video of the wedding on a loop, so people can watch it at their leisure, rather than forcing the party to stop so we can AW ourselves out.

It'll be a party, not a reception.  No special dances, no fancy intros ect.

amyteall

We are having a small ceremony in Italy for just family, and the an AHR for family and friends. The AHR will basically be a party with food and music. In no way our the guests to our AHR "b list guests." It was very important for my fiance and I to have a small ceremony and a DW was the way we decided to do that.

We are not really going to have decorations at the AHR, maybe some pictures from the wedding to share but no slideshows or videos. I am planning to wear a cocktail dress, not my wedding dress. That's what we feel comfortable with, but I respect everyone's take on it.

As far as an AHR being a grab for gifts - we actually mentioned to some people that we weren't going to register anywhere and people were upset about that. People want to celebrate our marriage, they don't care if they were at the ceremony or not.