assigned seats/tables?

meladoriestar

This is something my father feels very strongly about: no assigned seats! He's Indian (I'm half - mom is white), and the Indians are more about walking around and mingling. The thought of assigned seats is shocking to my dad and his friends.

However, I've been to weddings as a guest where they didn't do assigned seats. When the announcement for dinner was made, I was in the bathroom. When I made it to the dinner room, there was only 1 free seat at each table, so me and my date ended up having to sit in a separate area from everyone just to be together.

My dad's solution is just to set up an extra table or two. That seems like it might work. We are doing entree selections, so I plan to make escort cards of sorts, that just list the name on one side and the entree on the back, so the caterers know where to serve what. 

How have you all done receptions without assigned seating? Any suggestions?

Sue-n-Kevin

Most of the weddings I've been to have assigned tables, not seats. After dinner, everyone mingles & walks around. Explain to your Dad that it would be fine to mix and mingle after dinner, and most people do. But the reception venue may not set up "extra tables" without charging for the people that would sit there.

Good luck.,

AKG_JGJ

We're doing assigned tables but not seat. I've been to weddings and been in your situation as well, OP. They are a pain, but I feel like they're a necessary evil. I agree with PPs suggestion. 

SuMmErKuTiE

I've never been to a wedding without assigned tables. I vote for assigned tables, but not seats. Group together your guests as you see most appropriate at each table, but don't tell them which seat to sit in. Instead of having the placecards at each table already designating a seat, have them outside the reception hall for the guests to pick up on their way in and they can choose their own seat at their assigned table.

If your dad's family is used to mingling, they can still do so, but it'll help dinner service to be much more organized.

bellebride116

We did assigned tables, not seats. I went to one wedding with no assigned tables/seats and it was so messy. Everyone was moving chairs around to create more seats at some tables. It was a disaster.

aerinpegadrak

Explain to your dad that open seating actually discourages mingling, because people who don't want to lose their seat will stay there all night.  If you know you have a home base, you can drop your stuff and go say hi to other people without worrying that someone will have taken your spot when you get back.  A table assignment isn't a ball and chain, people can and will get up and move around.

megk8oz

We did assigned tables, not seats. Everybody was very happy with the arrangement, because everybody got to sit with their date, and like, 91-year-old Gram didn't end up right next to the DJ and whatnot. I strongly reccommend doing tables, and when you set them up, just try to keep people seated with people they'd be most comfortable with (Aunt Muriel may not be too thrilled sitting with FI's frat brothers, ya know?).

Explain to your dad that assigning tables isn't forcing people to not mingle, it's just giving the a gauranteed seat for the meal that they will like. People aren't stupid, they know that when they're not eating how to get up and talk to people that they want to.

Also, you might want to check with your venue about adding an extra table or 2. Most places will only set up the amount of tables you need based on the final head count you give them.

aubreyalise

i'm actually not doing assigned tables/seats. we're going to have our bridal party table and one for our parents/siblings, and that's it. our wedding is small and fairly laid-back. we'll have 60 guests and it'll be a buffett dinner in a veranda. we're actually doing what your dad suggested, and we'll have more seating than we need which will hopefully resolve any issues with couples not being able to sit together.

mbcdefg

If people have to pick their meal ahead of time, I don't think that NOT assigning tables is going to work very well.

stefani103

I also vote for the assigned tables, not seats. That's what we're doing to keep people together (including friends who are now spread across the country and the different sides of our families). It means fewer tables (translated to fewer centerpieces too!). But there is plenty of time for mingling. If a table isn't full, we are still putting the extra chairs so people have room to move or others can come sit with them during non-lunch time. We are on a tight budget and doing a lot of prep and set up ourselves, so the assignments streamline a lot of the reception planning.