Please Vote! At Home or Destination Wedding?!

ambersthebride

Please let me know what YOU would vote for.. a destination wedding or at home in Toronto - - - and why?????

Jewel224

I'm all for destination weddings - we've gone to a few of them in the past in my family and we love it.  But we're a close knit family, both immediate and extended, so we don't mind spending a week of our vacation to go.  Some people won't want to do that or spend the money for it. 

I actually wanted to have a DW this year, but my cousin decided to have one in January, and well, our family can't afford to attend 2 DWs, and I didn't want to wait until next year, so we are having ours here.

JennLax

You have to do what's best for you.

I personally wouldn't be in the financial position to attend a DW - even if it were a very close friend.  As long as you understand (and accept) that choosing a DW may mean choosing to not have important people in your life there, then I said go for it. 

sudburybride

DW!

After 8 months of planning my traditional wedding (1 more month to go!), looking back I would have rather had a destination wedding. I've learned from the stresses and headaches of planning that at the end of it all, it's you and your spouse vowing to be together. Whoever will come, will come. May as well be in a sunny destination where it's all done for you!

That being said, if I did have a DW in the first place, I probably would have felt bad not having a Traditional Wedding :P . If we ever renew our vows, it'll be destination all the way.

Littlin

I decided to have one here in TO because I wanted as many friends and family there that wanted to attend as possible.  However, my brother is having a DW in 2 weeks and I can't wait!  Definitely need to do what's best for you in terms of what you think is most important.

naomikb

A DW can be easier to plan (iassuming you're okay with the default stuff that the resort provides) because you don't usually do lots of DIY, take lots of favours and stuff down with you.  But obviously it is more expensive for everyone involved (except maybe the B&G if you don't do an AHR).  If you have lots of elderly family who won't be able to travel (or won't travel to such a hot place) or friends who are students/can't afford to go, then I'd take that into consideration.  It depends if you want everyone to come or not, typically DWs are quite small (10-30 people).

We did one in the GTA because we wanted all our friends/family to be able to come and to not have to spend a ton of money.  It was important for us to have everyone there.

LILIPAD27

Even though, weddings are stupid expensive and stupid stressful at times, and even when people don't give a shite about the work you put in, I would still do it here in Toronto.  Do what your gut tells you unless you really can't afford it but then I'd say, just keep it even simplier and just keep it to family.

amme5832

As a guest, I prefer the at-home wedding - assuming you are talking resort style (1 week away) destination.  Perhaps you mean weekend getaway?

Although I would love to attend a friend's wedding if it's a destination, there are a few issues:
1. Being able to afford to attend (both fiance and I would go, because I wouldn't want to take a vacation without him)
2. Being able to schedule the time off (I work in a small company and I can't take time off if a coworker has the time booked.  I also only get 10 weekdays off [weekends are no problem] for the year - if I've already booked my vacation time for the year, or just took vacation, then I don't have an option.  I may have to say no just because of that.)
3. When booking a vacation, my preference is to have control over the location and expense of the trip.  If the location / venue isn't somewhere that I want to go, it's a little disappointing.

As a bride, I knew family couldn't afford to attend a destination wedding if I had one, and even if they could afford travel, they aren't exactly healthy enough or capable of flying

ladyvaill

we decided on at home because my FH's dad can't travel for medical reasons at the moment and my grandma wouldn't be able to attend due to travel.

ambersthebride

Thank you everyone!

I totally agree I hate the situation that some won't/can't travel, and it means not having many important people there on the day.

Home in Toronto is definitely my first choice but I am going to look at city owned buildings and catering options. (I'm so anti-banquet hall it's not funny).

If anyone has any catering ideas or knowledge I'd love to hear em!

amme5832

Amber, we're going with a historic house in Markham that allows us to bring in our own (house approved) caterer and alcohol. It has a ballroom for dinner and dancing, a groom get ready room, a bride get ready room (of course, it is bigger though). I'm not sure of The size of your wedding - I believe the max capacity is 120. Our catering has been very reasonable as well! If you want more details, my venue is Heintzman House, and my caterer is Merlyn's Unique Caterers

Jewel224

Amber - a lot will depend on how much you can spend for your wedding. You need to decide first how many people can you afford to host.  Then it will be easier to give you reception ideas and costs.  Have you and your FI already decided on this?