Catholic Weddings

is converting required for mass wedding?

I was baptized Luthern..FI is catholic and wants a mass wedding. We both are under the impression I have to convert to have this. Does anyone know the church rules? I do not regularly attend church, but have attended his and enjoy it, however, converting seems timely and I'm not sure it's realy something I want to do. It's important to FI that we have a mass...Need some advice. Thanks

Re: is converting required for mass wedding?

  • meltoinemeltoine
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Comments First Answer
    member
    edited December 2011
    There is no hard and fast rule about both partners needing to be Catholic to have a mass. It's up to the individual priest to make the determination. Most won't do the full mass because your wedding is supposed to be a sign of your unity, but only one of you is participating in the Eucharist. Also, keep in mind that about half o the guests (you family) may be uncomfortable with the mass. 
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  • Theresa626Theresa626
    1000 Comments
    member
    edited December 2011
    I've heard that they will not do a mass unless both members are Catholic.  However, you can have a service that is very similar to a mass.  There just wouldn't be the Eucharist (communion).  I also disagree that a lot of members of your family would be uncomfortable with a mass.  You know your family best but I would never assume when going to a wedding that the wedding service had to be a religion I already know or am familiar with.  I think people in general would not mind if you had a service for a religion they are unfamiliar with. 
  • edited December 2011
    When I meet with my preist I wanted to have a Nuptial Mass and was told that becuase my FI wasn't baptized in any faith that this was not an option. After doing my homework I just recently I have found out that if one member is Catholic they have a right to have Nuptial mass regardless of what the faith the other has, it is my right as a catholic to have a Nuptial Mass.  Most would suggest not having one but it depends on personally perference and how important it is to the Catholic member. 
  • jnnslssrjnnslssr
    First Comment
    member
    edited December 2011
    Thank you all for your help. We decided today best is to contact the priest first, so most things I read on line say it's the best thing to do.
  • agapecarrieagapecarrie
    Tenth Anniversary 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    member
    edited December 2011
    It depends on whether the future spouse is baptized or not.

    A Catholic marrying a baptized non-Catholic may have a mass if desired. A Catholic marrying a non-baptized person may NOT have a mass.
  • Calypso1977Calypso1977
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    member
    edited December 2011
    only one person has to be Catholic in order to have Mass.

    Some will say you shouldn't have Mass because folks will feel "left out" if they cannot receive.  i personally have never understood this.   I have never felt left out at weddings of other faiths, and as a Catholic i am not allowed to receive communion at those services either (because of my faith).  its abotu having respect for the wishes of the couple getting married, and if the couple decides together to have a catholic wedding with Mass, tehn people need to grow up and accept it.  Communion lasts 10 minutes, and folks can go up for a blessing even if tehy cannot receive the host.

    If the Mass is important to your FI, in my opinion, you really should not deny  him the Mass. 
  • cukimerrydollcukimerrydoll
    1000 Comments
    member
    edited December 2011
    In Response to Re: is converting required for mass wedding?:
    It depends on whether the future spouse is baptized or not. A Catholic marrying a baptized non-Catholic may have a mass if desired. A Catholic marrying a non-baptized person may NOT have a mass.
    Posted by agapecarrie
    This.

    But if the priest isn't comfortable with it, they do get the final decision.  I'm Catholic, he's not.  And ours is cool with it.
  • edited December 2011
    I am Catholic and my FI is baptist.  The only requirement we had was that he had to produce proof that he had been baptized.  That's it. 
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