Pre-Cana

jesslovespete

Based on the posts I've read on the board here, our pre-cana is a little different! We just have the one pre-cana class (an 8 hour day) then we'll have 3 meetings one-on-one with the priest marrying us. No sponsor couple and no engaged encounter. Has anyone else had pre-cana in this format? Our class is in a few weeks and I'm just not sure what to expect (a little nervous!).

TIA!

Riss91

Mine was similar - except we had two 8-hour classes. The classes were very interesting and helpful and mainly centered on communication and caring for one another. We really enjoyed it!

jesslovespete

Thats comforting to hear! Its kind of like relationship counseling?

Riss91

Our courses were about communication, showing appreciation, settling disputes, etc. So it was more of a psychology course than a religion course. We weren't required to take an NFP course, but the did a brief discussion about it. They also briefly discussed communicating with children. We had breaks in between each talk to discuss with our fiance. I really liked it!

Calypso1977

ours was an initial meeting wtih the priest to do paperwork, etc.., then just 3 meetings with him one on one.  i enjoyed it.  it was very faith based and focused on the sacrament rather than secular things like balancing our checkbook.

mbcdefg

Yes, ours was similar.

We had one eight-hour session with a bunch of other couples in a school gym ... we were split into groups of maybe four couples per table, and we also had some time to discuss things between just the two of us. Married couples, and a priest, led the sessions. We didn't have any sponsor couples or an Engaged Encounter weekend, although I think the EE weekend was an option if we wanted to do that instead of a full-day session.

It was fine. Honestly, unless you and FI have never, ever discussed important issues (religion, money, children, sex, caring for elderly parents, etc.), you should be fine. Most of the couples at our table were whispering things like, "Um, if people don't know this stuff already then they shouldn't be getting married."

We met with the priest about three times before our wedding. We took the FOCCUS test once, and he really didn't go over the results with us, except to suggest that we might want to talk more with each other about our religious views. Some of it was talking about the layout of our wedding ceremony, and some of it was talking to us about our family lives and work and how we met.

The priest has also known me and my family for a while, though, so IDK if he goes more in-depth with couples that he's not familiar with. And he's a down-to-earth, funny guy, so that certainly helped take a lot of the pressure off.

jesslovespete

Thanks ladies! I feel a lot less nervous! I hope our experience is as good as yours!

MopsieB

Our pre-cana was really painless...Unless you live in a super conservative archdiocese, I bet yours will be fine, too. We decided not to do the Denver one because it lumps all ages together and takes THREE DAYS- almost 20 hours- to get through. Instead, we did a "special" pre cana for people 30 and over in Chicago (I'm in grad school in Chicago), which was basically seven hours on a Saturday at Old St. Pat's Church downtown. Our table consisted of three other couples- one already married in a Luthern Church and expecting their first baby; a long distance couple (like us) and a couple who had been together for many years and had three kids already...What made it fun for us were the other couples at our table. The leaders of the program meant well, but were really not upstanding choices for examples of marriage. For starters, they told us about their struggle with infertility and how they used I.V.F. to try and get pregnant, even though I.V.F. and other forms of artificial conception are forbidden by the Catholic church. I was a little disappointed that no priest even conducted a blessing over the proceedings or checked in at any point, but we got a workbook that we can refer to and as far as things that the church makes you do, it's probably useful for couples to focus on each other exclusively for a few hours before they get married! Good luck! I think you will be fine.