Connecticut

Rant: I've had it with these RSVPs!

So, today was the last straw. My RSVP is Monday and as you can see I am still waiting on a decent amount. What really boils my blood is that I now have familiy memebers hunting people down to ask them to send an RSVP. Seriously? How easy could I have made it? You got a STD 6 months ago. You got a invitation, with a response card, addressed return envelope and with a stamp 3 months ago! JUST GET A PEN AND SEND IT BACK. Why do I have to feel like im seeking people out to come to my wedding, you want to come or you don't. LET ME KNOW.

Now this morning I woke up to a text saying my step mothers father was coming and to put him down for steak. Why did I invite you did you just lose the invite? Seriously? My aunt and uncle complained that the hotel booked up for reservations so they have to stay across the street (boohoo, you missed the hotel block cut off date which you had 2 months to book) Oh and glad you got your hotel because you haven't sent me an RSVP yet. cool.


Sigh, sorry for the rant but this has just been really bugging me all weekend. I think I'm really annoyed about it is that we're blocked into 150 regardless so i'd like to know if we're going to actually meet it now or not. Anyone else feel the same way with these invites?

Re: Rant: I've had it with these RSVPs!

  • Vanessa630Vanessa630 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The absolute worst part of wedding planning- no question. 

    I feel your pain. If it makes you feel better....for as many times as we said "we should have done a small destination wedding," it was totally worth it in the end.

    Good luck
  • edited December 2011
    My RSVP date in next friday. I had a bunch of RSVPs at first, and now they're trickling in - I even had to ask my FMIL about hers! COME ON! I think we've got about half of the RSVPs back. but I doubt we get the other half over the next 9 days.

    Keep it cool, sista. it'll all come together!
  • calindicalindi member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011

    When it's my turn, I will try to remember all the RSVPs I procrastinated on or just took a short cut and Facebook messaged the friend that I was coming or not.

    In this modern day of technology, they may think it's quicker to just let you know via phone/email/Facebook/text/word of mouth than to put the darn thing in the mailbox.  I know I've been guilty of this, so I'm going to try to be patient when it's my turn to hunt people down!

    Just try to take a deep breath, remind yourself that in the scheme of things a few days won't make a big difference and they're not doing this just to drive you nuts, and give them a call right after the RSVP date lapses. 


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  • megbrooks2011megbrooks2011 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    This was my most unfavorite part of the wedding process!
    There were so many that we didn't receive and I wouldn't have been so upset but those darn stamps add up!  We didn't even receive one back from his brother, the best man.  It's wild.  I know there were some people that were on the fence and trying to make it so I was patient with them.  But honestly the best man?  Anywho start what you can for the tables and just add the late responders when you receive theirs.
    GL!
  • jdboden73jdboden73 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am expecting to have the same problem with my RSVPs. I am pretty certain of everyone on my fiance's side, but have no idea about my own family.  We aren't that close. When my brother got married in 1999 an uncle of mine actually called to RSVP the morning of his wedding and asked if he could bring an extra person and if it was OK to wear jeans!! What?? Yep, that's my family.  Hope you can take a deep breath and know it will all be worth it in the end when you have the magical memories of your wedding day.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • calindicalindi member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I do feel like people like immediate family and wedding party might think it's a given that they're coming.  It doesn't make it right, but if my brother didn't send back the RSVP I'd still know he was coming!

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  • edited December 2011
    I totally went through this too. I think it's a rite of passage on the way to the altar. My husband's own brother (who was in the bridal party) never responded. When we asked him why, he said it was because he never got to the post office for a stamp. Enraged, I said, if you took the time to open the damn envelope, you would SEE there was a stamp on it for you!!! Grrrrr! He wasn't the only one though. We got about 20 rsvp's back the week AFTER our rsvp date, and 2 months after the wedding there are about 10 that we just never got back at all.

    People are just oblivious to the amount of time put into an invitation. It's really annoying, and I'll never understand why people can't just check a box and put it in the mail, but it's something that probably plagues every bride. You're not alone!! I hope it all works out for you! 

    P.S- We also were locked in to a certain amount of people. We ended up having to pay for 3 imaginary people. Sucks, but at that point the wedding had turned into such a money pit that all you can do is laugh or you'll cry :)
  • edited December 2011
    Haha I know i'm going to end up paying for imaginary guests but i'm hoping its not more than 10 at this point! I also had to hound my FI's brother, the best man, to send his. My biggest thing is that people can tell me theyre coming but I also need to know what they are eating and I'd like to have it on paper so I don't forget/randomly pick something for them. Bah! I've definitely been guilty of the late RSVP but never again! I've been patient up until this point but its so close bleeeeh. I bet i'll get them all on aug 2. hahaha and yes, some people don't realize how much work goes into an invitation and how much of a process it was. 
  • megbrooks2011megbrooks2011 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    <div align="left">In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_connecticut_rant-ive-rsvps?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:65Discussion:b6317837-60be-46db-9eee-d7a829298d6bPost:f0156f7e-f57e-4e18-9880-8408fad811da">Re: Rant: I've had it with these RSVPs!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Haha I know i'm going to end up paying for imaginary guests but i'm hoping its not more than 10 at this point! I also had to hound my FI's brother, the best man, to send his. <strong>My biggest thing is that people can tell me theyre coming but I also need to know what they are eating and I'd like to have it on paper so I don't forget/randomly pick something for them</strong>. Bah! I've definitely been guilty of the late RSVP but never again! I've been patient up until this point but its so close bleeeeh. I bet i'll get them all on aug 2. hahaha and yes, some people don't realize how much work goes into an invitation and how much of a process it was. 
    Posted by alexismurda[/QUOTE]

    Ding! Ding!  That's how I felt.  My spreadsheet didn't end up matching the flash cards I had to give the venue so it was nice to be able to go back to and reference the RSVP cards.  And it didn't help that we didn't have some to reference.
    I also had four people RSVP and then not come.  And one of them being the "can I bring the guy I'm dating for three weeks?"  I said SURE!!!...and then they broke up a day before the wedding.  I think it was the most expensive break up for me.
    </div>
  • cdbishopcdbishop member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am not looking forward to this part of the process.  I am one that always responds right when i get an invite.  I don't understand some times.  Is it really that hard to check a box and put in a mail box?

    Sorry you are dealing with this, good luck!
  • edited December 2011
    I am know in the end I will feel the same way too! I'm sure I will have some stragglers!! I'm surprised at who hasn't responded yet and who has already.. It's actually quite interesting.. I feel your pain!! Good luck!!
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  • rswan412rswan412 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I totally hear your pain...however, I am one of the waiting till the last minute to RSVP. I am getting so much better at it though!
  • banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Aside from MIL issues, this was my least favorite part too!
  • pprendipprendi member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I just sent out my invites last week. We have received a few back. Most of the people who responded are my parent's friends who I barely know. My mom made me invite some family members who I know will be a pain. Two of the older ladies from work I invited said, Oh we don't drive that far." I said that they weren't obligated to come. They said we'll see. Are they kidding? Don't complain, just say yes or no.
  • edited December 2011
    Yup, this is pretty typical.  Super frustrating, but typical.

    I was thinking what you were (we got a bunch of RSVPs the week *after* our deadline), as in how hard is it to write a response and drop the envelope in the mailbox, but I do know that sometimes when I get an invite if I don't send it right away then I forget about it.

    When you get a verbal response, just write it down on an index card and be glad you have one more answer.  And do your best to be patient the week after your deadline to see what comes in before you start harassing people - as you said, if they miss out on lodging, that is their problem, not yours!
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